Wedding in a month

I think you should have an honest discussion with your mom (possibly with an impartial mediator) and get to the root of why she feels the way she does about him. I think you should gently explain to her why you love him and all of the positive things he brings to your life. Let her know that you dont want to pick sides but that you ARE marrying him no matter what and that it would mean the world to you if she could get along with him. It should be a frank but still loving discussion, but when it comes down to it, she doesnt have to approve of him. The fact that you and he love each other is the only thing that matters in the long run.

Thank you all for your advice. It is all appreciated.

I am looking for something smaller to just celebrate the marriage with close family. We still aren't positive where we should have it. A house isn't an option because we don't know anyone that has a house big enough. We are thinking either a nice hall with a kitchen or my grandmas church basement. Or my dads unoccupied upstairs?

The church is cheaper than a hall, but it's not very nice looking and it would mean we have to invite all the family that goes there, which is a lot.

Plus my mom has openly told me that he isn't good enough and she is perpously trying to make him feel unwelcome. Any tips on how to handle that? I don't want to have to pick a side.

It's your day you can do whatever you like!!! There is quite a bit involved in planning a wedding, so a month won't leave you too much time, so maybe you can do the Justice of the Peace, then maybe a cocktail reception!? Or a cake and punch reception? Valerie suggests the cake and punch idea often and I love it!!!

Hi E! Welcome to the community! I'm so happy you're joining us! It's so exciting that you're getting so spontaneously! I can imagine how nervous you must be at the same time, but don't worry, let's think about ways to make this as fun and smooth as possible. I think if you feel comfortable having something smaller or intimate, you should go for it! You could also take a look at these discussions for ideas:

Civil, religious or symbolic ceremony?

Anyone else doing a non-traditional ceremony + reception?

How would you like your reception to look like?

What are you most excited about getting married? In what kind of venue would you like to celebrate your wedding?

WOW! You certainly are planning quickly!

I think it is perfectly acceptable (and probably easier!) to go to a Justice of the Peace and simply host a reception afterwards. Booking a location for a ceremony is a lot of extra planning for you. So check our your courthouse options for sure!

Don't let your family talk you into a bigger wedding than you want! An intimate celebration after your private ceremony is beautiful! I think it is a great idea. If you are just having a small gathering, you might want to consider having food brought in from a caterer. You can set things up buffet style, but that way you don't have to worry about asking people to do work before they come, or accomodating people who might need to heat things up, and the risks of foodborne illness if things are not prepped properly. You can find inexpensive caterers, and I think it is worth the cost to avoid the extra thing for you to coordinate on your very busy wedding day!

If u want it plain and simple. Just a juice of the peace and have the ceremony and reception in someone backyard.

Hello and welcome to the community!

First of all, congratulations on your engagement, and already figuring the date and the type of gathering you would like Where are you planning on holding your potluck?

Before tackling your questions, what do you envision when you think about your wedding? It sounds to me like you are interested in something low-key and intimate (correct me if I am wrong!). Where you planning for your potluck to fall on the same day as your wedding ceremony? Why not have that as your reception?

At the end of the day, you and your FH have to be happy, and if you picture having a small wedding, do that! Especially since your FH's family can't be there!

Anyways, not sure this helps, but feel free to write more if you have any other questions!

Karen