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Bianca
Master August 2019 Ontario

Venue Anxiety

Bianca, on January 31, 2018 at 11:02 Posted in Plan a wedding 0 27
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I don’t know about anyone else but I am having venue anxiety. So we found the venue, the price is right, but they have us committing to a minimum number of guaranteed adults. This wasn’t a problem until my fiancé started putting doubt in my mind regarding how many guest will show up (the entire planning process I have been trying to pull the guest list down but it was constantly growing). Now I don’t know what to do.

Initially I wanted 100-120 guests at an intimate venue but now we’re looking at banquet halls and I’m getting overwhelmed. The venue we want is beautiful. Other similar venues have less minimums (or no minimum) for guests, OR the venues are almost perfect except for a handful of things.

Anyone been in a similar predicament? I’ve got a week to decide what I’m going to do.

27 Comments

Latest activity by Lina, on February 2, 2018 at 18:46
  • Lina
    Frequent user May 2018 Alberta
    Lina ·
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    I'm glad you found your answer. In the end it's about you and your loved ones.

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  • Bianca
    Master August 2019 Ontario
    Bianca ·
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    That’s a very romantic way of looking at things 😍
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  • Lina
    Frequent user May 2018 Alberta
    Lina ·
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    I didn't mine the minimum requirement because there are always more people you can invite. People that you meet along the way to planning, like other brides you connect with, or co-workers that offer helping hands with no expectations of being invited. If anything I have problems with keeping to my numbers. I want the world to share my day. To know how proud I am of the person I want to marry.


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  • Candace
    VIP May 2019 Ontario
    Candace ·
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    View quoted message
    We were looking at Bellamere Winery in London but we ended up booking Windermere Manor instead
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  • Jacqueline
    Newbie June 2019 Ontario
    Jacqueline ·
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    What winery did you book?
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  • Bianca
    Master August 2019 Ontario
    Bianca ·
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    Thanks for sharing your experience with this problem!

    After spending the day thinking about things, I’m feeling like I’ll make the right choice in the end ☺️
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  • Candace
    VIP May 2019 Ontario
    Candace ·
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    I had anxietywith meeting the minimum requirements for a venue at first but then we switched venues. A winery we were looking at had deals for the more people you had, we easily would have been able to have 120-150 people required to get the deal that we could afford but then my fiancé pointed out that if some people didn’t come (which because of the distance some might not) then we wouldn’t be able to afford it as comfortably. This got us stressing and freaking out until we found the venue we booked which is just as gorgeous and for a better price has a better wedding package.
    Things workout in the end
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  • Bianca
    Master August 2019 Ontario
    Bianca ·
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    Hahah same! My family is Italian so this will be the smallest family wedding most of them will probably ever see.
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  • Courtney
    Super July 2018 Ontario
    Courtney ·
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    I'm still always internally shocked when people are like 70 people? THATS IT?!

    Like holy moly. I feel like I have no friends haha.

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  • Carol
    Super March 2018 Ontario
    Carol ·
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    When we did the list, we started with the people that had to be there, I guess you could say the A list Lol , then it was filled up with close friends, cousins, friends that we stay in contact with, but not necessarily see on a regular, then co-workers. We still have people that we want there but 185 is our max in the room, so people sending regrets will be filled with those, and then we have people coming to the dance portion only, my older family members don't drink, and are fairly religious, and won't stay long after dinner, so their places will be filled with those that couldn't fit for dinner.
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  • Bianca
    Master August 2019 Ontario
    Bianca ·
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    That’s very interesting! It never occurred to me to ask to upgrade some other feature of our wedding.

    And I feel ya on the “having a small wedding by comparison”. It’s getting annoying tbh. Sometimes I wish I were having a large wedding just so people venues would take it seriously.
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  • Bianca
    Master August 2019 Ontario
    Bianca ·
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    Good luck! That’s a lot of invites you’ve got going out. Question for you, did you have an “A-List” and “B-List” for your invitees or did you just invite everyone you wanted to?
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  • Bianca
    Master August 2019 Ontario
    Bianca ·
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    Thanks Jessica, I think I will go with my gut! After I go through the guest-list throughly tonight, I’ll have a clear picture of what I’m dealing with and adjust accordingly.
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  • Bianca
    Master August 2019 Ontario
    Bianca ·
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    We can afford to pay 20-30% if we have to however! It’s what our contingency budget is for! I just don’t want to have to go there if it can be avoided!
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  • Bianca
    Master August 2019 Ontario
    Bianca ·
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    I don’t have the exact numbers but we would need approximately 90% to commit to reach out minimum. HOWEVER, this is from our “A-List” of invitees. We had a “B-List” that could easily fill the rest. To be honest, I don’t want to go into the B-list if I don’t have to due to these people not being as close to us.
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  • Bianca
    Master August 2019 Ontario
    Bianca ·
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    I wish I were only dealing with maximum guests allowed! Unfortunately the spaces I’m looking at (banquet halls) have a minimum. For what my fiancé and I both want, it’s what makes the most sense EXCEPT for the minimum we’re facing with some venues.
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  • Bianca
    Master August 2019 Ontario
    Bianca ·
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    Thanks for the advice Kryzia! You’re right, I might have to voice my concerns to the person at the venue. They have already been accommodating by lowering their usual minimum from 150 to 130, so I’m not sure how well that conversation might go lol

    Another reason why I love this place is because of how beautiful it is! Other venues would require expensive drapping to create a look I’d be pleased with, while this place is stunning naturally.

    Decisions decision!
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  • Courtney
    Super July 2018 Ontario
    Courtney ·
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    Minimums are ALWAYS tricky.

    We're having a small wedding (75 people.. which I still can't fathom is small). There were so many venues that we looked at where we didn't have enough people to actually book with them! Minimum was 100 or 110.

    The venue we ended up going with charges a minimum dollar amount. With the amount of people we're having and the Cost Per Person we don't actually meet that minimum dollar amount. Our venue however, is allowing us to 'upgrade' or 'add' things such as more apps, more expensive liquor to 'spend' that extra money to get us to the minimum.

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  • Carol
    Super March 2018 Ontario
    Carol ·
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    My venue requires a minimum of 125 guests, we are at 112 confirmed, and we have 73 left to get replies from, now those are from my tradiotional family, that wants a physical paper invitation in their hand. I'm really hoping that 10 to 20 of them send regrets, because we have a second list of people that we want there, but had to get bumped for family. We saw about 20 venues and probably 16 of them required minimums.

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  • Jessica
    Super March 2018 Ontario
    Jessica ·
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    As Stephanie said in another post, you should check with them what the minimum is. If you can afford it (even without that many attending), then I would continue on with them if that's the venue you fell in love with. So if they need 100 people and you can pay for 100, even if only 80 show up, then I'd say do it (even if it's a little odd that they request that).

    I invited over 230 people, and I had almost half respond no. Right now we're looking at around 140 people. Our wedding is also in the winter which makes travel tricky and we had a lot of out of town guests who would have to rely on flying, so I'm not overly surprised by the numbers. Go with your gut!

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  • Lynnie
    WeddingWire Admin October 2016 North Carolina
    Lynnie ·
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    Hi Bianca! What percentage of your guests need to RSVP yes to hit your minimum? Make sure to factor in how far your guests are traveling!

    To be super cautious I'd want to make sure that you can afford for 20-30% of your guests to RSVP no, or be comfortable meeting the minimum spend regardless of the RSVPs!

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  • Jen
    VIP June 2018 Ontario
    Jen ·
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    I've never heard of a minimum at venues.. only a maximum.

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  • Kryzia
    Curious July 2018 Ontario
    Kryzia ·
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    Our venue didn't have a guest minimum, but they did require us to book their in-house audio/visual people. So, I can understand where you're coming from. I fell in love with the place immediately, so we booked the place. But now the audio/visual company is charging us a lot more than we originally anticipated and it's given me serious anxiety to the point that I want to cancel. But the place has been super accommodating since I've expressed my concerns. Your venue might be more flexible than you think. Just keep the lines of communication open.

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  • Bianca
    Master August 2019 Ontario
    Bianca ·
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    We will see! I just had a talk with my fiancé that really put some of my anxieties at ease. Just one of those things that needed to be addressed out loud lol
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  • Stephanie
    Master July 2018 Alberta
    Stephanie ·
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    I see now. For us, venue was one of the top three things. Also, I am the type of person who, once I see something I like, I can't forget about it, and the day of the wedding, I would feel like the other option was the second choice. But, everyone is different so if you are having second thoughts about it, maybe it's not the right place.

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  • Bianca
    Master August 2019 Ontario
    Bianca ·
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    I understand how minimum requirements work. What I’m getting at is I don’t know if I want to commit to one.

    ALSO, We’ll be sending out save-the-dates well in advance so there’s a strong chance that the majority who are invited will attend. My issue is I don’t know if I want to commit to that despite it being an incredible venue.
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  • Stephanie
    Master July 2018 Alberta
    Stephanie ·
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    A venue can't make you fill the minimum requirement; they can charge you for a minimum though. For example, if the minimum is 100, and you invite 150 people, and only 90 of them can come, you've done your part to try to meet that minimum requirement. They will still charge you as if 100 people came though. You can't control other people's schedules.

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