What has been the hardest wedding decision to agree on together?

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Oh, low key is completely my vibe too

So far so good! We seem to have the same idea of what we want, though we’re pretty good at compromising with each other I may not have notice lol

View quoted message No, the one here is actually going to be the low key one. I really don’t want to go traditional. Peruvian weddings are also extravagant with 100s of guests and my partner wants some of the extravagance so we’re putting more money into that one.

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That's an awesome idea, what a great compromise so are you guys doing a fully traditional Lebanese wedding here?

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Ouch! My dad's family is Lebanese (and large) so at first I swore off inviting aunts and uncles. I wanted a small wedding and as soon as I invited one aunt, I knew my family would say "you /have/ to invite x,y,z" my dad did it to my sister and it was a disaster for her (long story short, one uncle told us he extended the invite to all 7 of his adult kids and they RSVPd yes, but then none of them showed up, so he must have not said a thing). However, my dad also helped secure me a free venue with one of his clients, so in exchange, I offered to invite all the aunts and uncles, increasing my guest list by 20. It's been hard to work with the new budget and mentally preparing myself for unwanted guests, but there are so many positives from it, so I can't really complain.

More to the theme of the question, my fiance is from Peru and almost all of his family and a lot of his friends live there, so we're actually having two weddings and we decided that I get to plan the Canadian wedding the way I want it (within reason) and he gets to plan the Peruvian wedding, so there is very little compromise. Most of it so far has been his want for something a bit more classy. Where I'm all for plastic folding chairs and table cloths to save money, he doesn't want our wedding to end up looking like a cheap frat party. Haha. Can't blame him.

Surprisingly, no. We've been very good at planning together and both of us have a similar vision of what we'd like our wedding to look like.

The only thing we've disagreed on so far (knock on wood) was whether to have the wedding at all. I really wanted a small city hall thing, maybe followed by a small dinner with our families, and that was what we agreed on....... before telling our families. Then his mom started on him ("you're my oldest son, what will people say, don't you want to celebrate the most important day of your life" blah blah blah) and then FH wasn't so into the city hall thing. We kind of argued on and off for about 3 months while I started figuring out logistics. He wouldn't budge. So I'm having the big fat Lebanese-Ukrainian wedding I never wanted ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

The hardest things for us (more me but he gets upset when he sees me stressing like I was) was chasing our 1st photographer and then having to start from scratch less than 3 months before our Wedding to book a new one. The florist we booked in September cancelling just 2 weeks ago (due to health issues & she was a huge help finding our new florist) The worst was definitely getting the call on my Birthday that our Invitations which we were to mail the very next Morning were not in and they couldn't tell us if or when they may come in... Our Invitations went out 1 week later but I didn't sleep for that week. I hope with 49 days to go, we are truly hoping for some smooth sailing! 🤞🤞

Originally it was the date - i wanted 2019 and he wanted 2020. now i’m SO glad we chose 2020! the only other thing that took a bit of back and forth was wether or not to get a videographer. For now, we’ve table the discussion and will revisit closer to the wedding

We didn’t disagree on anything. He wanted me to be happy. I would take his opinion in consideration if he had one. His only must was to have great food, which we did!

Location/Style of wedding.

We both wanted to elope, but being an only-child, it just wasn't going to happen. So we started looking at other options: Small immediate family-only ceremony/reception in Canmore, or on Vancouver Island; Small wedding in Canmore; All-Inclusive at a resort; Reception-only event...

We had to make a decision sooner rather than later...so we decided to get married close to our hometown and where 95% of our guests are from.

We're definitely excited about our day, but definitely wish we had the balls to just do it here.

The biggest decision that was going back and forth about was the cake. A small wedding doesn't need that much cake to feed everyone. My point of view was small 3 tier cake as opposed to a showcase cake to display for the whole world to see. My husband the other way around to have the biggest and 4 tiers for everyone to just say WOW! The final result was what I decided and it was perfect as he was happy too with everything done just great.

Guest list was the only issue and we didn't disagree we both knew I had to cut my side down. We compromised and some people were not invited to dinner.

Nope! Nothing really! I have done a majority of the planning but I wouldnt choose anything without his approval! There have been a few things I've suggested that he didnt like and we changed it!

We had a little disagreement on how much to spend on photography. But I'm a photographer so it was really important to me to have good photos. And it's my brothers friends that are taking the photos, I couldn't not ask them. They've known me my whole life. Once I told him that, he was okay.
The rest of the planning has been good.

The only trouble were having is him giving me his input!! Lol... hes totally fine with whatever I want and decide to do which is great (no arguments) but I wish he would help make some decisions.

Guest list.
We both want it small and his list is smaller than mine.

If I could go back and tell advise myself it would be to stick to my original plan and keep it smaller than small, bc by the time additional people are added it’s no longer the small intimate gathering that you intended it to be. (Thankfully it hasn’t gotten to that point as yet)

Mainly the guest list. Most of my family is overseas and there won’t be a huge number of them but my fiancé’s mother wanted everyone petty much invited and we’re having the smallest wedding of all her children. My fiancé was siding with him mum until I made him realize just how disproportionate it would be for me if all these people he has met once come.

Where to have the wedding has been the hardest to agree on. We initially wanted a destination, but had to change due to my grandma not being able to come, and finances for my sister to travel from Australia.

Not so much a decision but to get him thinking about things. My logic is to get some things sorted out before hand so we don't have as much to do right before (this is very unusual for me - I usually procrastinate on things but my parents want to know things so I'm feeling the pressure to think about things earlier). My FH is more: can't we decide a week/month before the wedding?

He's not as involved as I am with the wedding so when he has ideas/suggestions, I'm very keen on them. One thing we wanted but my parents are against is him walking down the aisle lol. They think he should just appear out of a side entrance but he wants his 15 seconds of fame.

We also don't have a first dance song, there's not an obvious choice for us and he doesn't want country, I don't want anything that has been done over and over.

So far it's just that I wanted our Dog and Cat at our wedding but he said no :/ I get it though, I want them for pictures but don't want to look after them while we are having the wedding (instead we will probably just put the Dog in a Doggy Daycare).

Food was tough. FH wanted low key subway/pizza and my mom said hell no. And I sort of agreed with her. So as a compromise, she's paying for the food.

The guest list, who gets a plus one, who doesn't, how many people, how far into the family tree we send invites, etc. It really bothered me that he kept bringing the list into question when in my mind it was set and ready to go. We talked it over though and came up with a list that made us both happy, even though it's quite a bit bigger than we originally anticipated.

It has been our wedding colors! I wanted Navy for girls and grey for guys. He didn't like navy but I didn't like royal. Morilee recently came out with Saphire and we chose this. Even choosing his suits has been hard and not finished figuring it out.