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Sarah
Expert July 2021 Ontario

To postpone a second time... ?

Sarah, on March 24, 2021 at 09:45 Posted in Plan a wedding 1 38
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Hi everyone looking for some advice. We are debating whether or not to postpone our wedding a second time. Current Date is July 10 of this year. My fiancé doesn’t want it to be mask-y and we won’t get refunded if we have to cut down the guestlist so he wants to postpone. The future is so uncertain!!.
If we do postpone the reception, we will be eloping this May/June in the meantime. So we are getting married this year regardless.

Our guestlist is between 90-100 which would likely be allowed outdoors (it is now so I’m assuming July will be safe for that). But our venue is charging extra costs for moving reception outdoors which I haven’t heard back about yet.
Is it worth moving through with the wedding and having it still be covid-y this July orrrr should we push back again and just elope ?Im def leaning toward elopement as I think that would even make the big wedding feel more laid back too but I don’t want to regret it? I guess the grass is always greener no matter what we do

38 Comments

Latest activity by Sarah, on April 5, 2021 at 14:27
  • Sarah
    Expert July 2021 Ontario
    Sarah ·
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    It’s so true!!! I’m actually feeling excited at the idea of having a much more laid back feeling wedding (although it won’t look like it of course). Thank you so much Smiley smile !!!! Congrats to you as well!!
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  • Amanda
    Expert July 2022 Ontario
    Amanda ·
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    I am so pumped for you - It is so nice to be able to focus on your Husband that day and parents (All the people who mean the most) - Because on your BIG wedding day, you are always pulled left right and center and barley get time with the ones closest to you, so for that reason too, it made it that much more beautiful for us and our parents. Smiley smile

    I hope it is better than you think - I know it will be BEAUTIFUL ! Smiley ring
    Congratulations Girl!

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  • Brittneey
    Newbie July 2022 Ontario
    Brittneey ·
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    Heyy! So my fiancé and I were supposed to be getting married July 24th 2021 but had to postpone it until July 23rd 2022 only because covid has ruined everything and since my parents are not In the same province they couldn’t make it out. So postponing the wedding is a great idea
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  • Sarah
    Expert July 2021 Ontario
    Sarah ·
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    Thank you!! Yes we feel exactly the same. We don’t want to spend all our money and effort on a wedding that is so restricted. It’s reassuring to hear it turned out even better than you imagined! We have decided to go through with eloping and postponing, and it honestly feels so right for us. I’m actually so pumped for an intimate ceremony Smiley smile
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  • Amanda
    Expert July 2022 Ontario
    Amanda ·
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    This is a hard choice for MANY right now.
    I had pushed back my wedding for the 3rd time - Originally 2020, to 2021 and now 2022. That being said, we did get married in our home this February because we just wanted to be married and not WAIT any longer for the UNKNOWN.
    I think it is a great idea to do, we are so happy we did it and it turned out better then we could have ever imagined.
    If you do decide to have your wedding, just way your pro's and con's because you are going to be paying a pretty penny for your wedding, and to not have it they way YOU want... Is it worth it? Will you be ok with people dancing at their tables and not a dance floor? ... Masks anytime you leave your table etc. ?
    It wasn't worth it for us to spend the amount of money we had planned to not have my family dancing and being together - I am hoping next year everyone who wants to be vaccinated will be, and things will be a little more normal.

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  • Sarah
    Expert July 2021 Ontario
    Sarah ·
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    Thank you for sharing! Looks like we’re doing exactly the same thing Smiley smile
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  • Brianne
    Beginner May 2023 Ontario
    Brianne ·
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    Just wanted to say we did the same thing. Got legally married last year (we weren't sure what was going to happen!), postponed to 2021, and now just postponed again. We also want a chill feeling on our day, and the mandatory marks just didn't feel right. Obvs I'm biased but I think it'll be worth the wait. Enjoy your elopement 💜
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  • Sarah
    Expert July 2021 Ontario
    Sarah ·
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    Agreed completely. We decided to go this route as we don’t want to settle for a wedding with restrictions
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  • Vinod
    Featured August 2017 Ontario
    Vinod ·
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    Your points are valid and make sense to elope this year pushing back the bigger celebration for next year with the full guest list. You two want to make your day special and memorable with the thought your family and friends will be present to celebrate when everything is cleared up and open for travel. Postpone your venue for sure to feel reassured your on the right path and not lose your deposit or pay more.
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  • Bailey
    Beginner October 2021 Alberta
    Bailey ·
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    Ours is October 23rd ! I got engaged last summer and figured “well everything will be a distant memory next year” and here I am just anxiously viewing the vaccine rollout and the case numbers daily . Because I am just on edge about all of this ! Will have final decision in august weather we are postponing or not !
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  • Sarah
    Expert July 2021 Ontario
    Sarah ·
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    Exactly! To top it off if we had to cut the guestlist we wouldn’t even be refunded, just “credited” the extra like $4000. What a waste!! Just doesn’t seem worth it overall
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  • Amanda
    Featured August 2021 British Columbia
    Amanda ·
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    I totally agree with you! You spend all this money on your big day and you only get half of what your paying for and half of what you have been dreaming of for so long! It's not fair in anyway shape or form.

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  • Sarah
    Expert July 2021 Ontario
    Sarah ·
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    I honestly like your perspective too. To get married during covid is going to be like this cool historical thing years from now plus I respect adapting and rolling with the times!!
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  • Sarah
    Expert July 2021 Ontario
    Sarah ·
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    Agreed completely!!!
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  • Sarah
    Expert July 2021 Ontario
    Sarah ·
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    Love this! And those are all such great points. I agree I think by our date there will still be restrictions as well. It just doesn’t feel like it’ll be worth all the money and effort for what should be An amazing day.
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  • Sarah
    Expert July 2021 Ontario
    Sarah ·
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    Congrats!! That definitely sounds like a great idea. The best part is for your wedding one your little one can be involved Smiley smile
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  • Sarah
    Expert July 2021 Ontario
    Sarah ·
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    I love this and I agree with all of your points. At the end of the day, no we don’t want to feel cheated out of anything and deprive ourselves of the “full experience”. Thank you this really helps affirm my stance!
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  • Sarah
    Expert July 2021 Ontario
    Sarah ·
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    Thank you, I agree and my fiancé feels the same!
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  • Sarah
    Expert July 2021 Ontario
    Sarah ·
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    Hahah omg we are the same!! If we were to go through with it this year (unlikely honestly) I would def go mask free.. with all that make up and in July.. no way haha!
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  • Hank
    Featured September 2021 Ontario
    Hank Online ·
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    In my opinion, since you're not in a rush to get married in order to take any next steps in life, I would postpone simply for the economical factor. You won't get refunded regardless if your numbers are smaller and I think you mentioned even with a "cut down" guest list of 100, you already overpaid anyway. So if that money is not coming back to you, you might as well make your vendor work for it.

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  • Julia
    Newbie August 2021 Ontario
    Julia ·
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    We are doing the same. 🙂 Now that we’ve put so much effort into planning the big day, as well as so much emotional energy and anticipation, I can’t imagine us postponing it. We’ll take what we can get, and if things are weird due to covid, it will all just be part of our wedding story. One day our grandkids will be very amused to hear what a wedding was like during covid. 🙂
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  • Gloria
    Expert October 2022 Ontario
    Gloria ·
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    Yeah we’re thinking of postponing our OCT wedding again Smiley sad I don’t want masks and “no dancing” at our wedding... weddings should be fun not sit down have dinner and leave Smiley sad
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  • Amanda
    Featured August 2021 British Columbia
    Amanda ·
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    My fiance and I are probably going to be postponing for a second time. We're getting married in BC on August 7. We're in the same boat as well. I really don't want t be wearing masks at my wedding. As well as possibly only having 10 people at our wedding. Even if things to get better by August, receptions might be the same as last summer where you can't leave your table and mingle as well as no dancing. What kind of wedding is that without dancing?!

    Some people will think your crazy to postpone again and again and say "just get married, it's just another day" But if you want to have your wedding the way you want it to be and not have any regrets, then postpone until you can have your dream wedding! My fiance and I are on the same page and we want to remember our wedding day for years to come with most of our friends and family present and not look back and wish we had done things differently. We will eventually get married. We have our whole lives together.

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  • Mackenzie
    Curious August 2022 Ontario
    Mackenzie ·
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    Me and my fiance have decided to post pone a second time.
    We cant do a civil ceremony and we just found out we are expecting in November so we decided it would be best to focus on that and have our wedding fully next year.
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  • E
    Beginner June 2021 Ontario
    Erika ·
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    We are in the same boat! Originally 6/6/2020 to 6/26/2021 and we now going to get married with our immediate family and wedding party that day. We will postpone the big celebration (only 150 guests) to when it’s safe. We won’t even plan and/or pick a date until life returns to normal. We’ve heard great things from people who have done this and had an amazing day with their closest family and friends, and then can celebrate with no restrictions. I really couldn’t justify spending so much money on a glorified dinner when there’s dancing restrictions and it will feel tense and uncomfortable. Weddings are about the social aspect and even with our outdoor venue, it’s not about being able to have 100 guests, it’s about the overall guest experience too. Ontario has so many restrictions and I don’t want to look back at our day years later and feel cheated over the money we spent for the mediocre experience we had. We’re going to go all out with decor and have a beautiful day regardless this year, and I feel relieved with this decision because I can actually feel excited now that we are for sure getting married. Before it was just up in the air of if these restrictions will be lifted, will we be in lockdown, will it happen, etc etc.
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  • Daily
    Frequent user August 2022 Ontario
    Daily ·
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    Omg same here!! I have two kids too. No way I’m compromising my wedding. I only wear mask at work or out because it is mandatory. I want people to see my face. Might sound selfish but I want it my Way!! 😂😭😭
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  • Sarah
    Expert July 2021 Ontario
    Sarah ·
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    Yes! I agree wholeheartedly. I think it’ll still be mask-y by July and I am def concerned about other restrictions as well. I want us and our family /friends to have a good time! I don’t want people to miss out because they’re not comfortable etc. Thanks for sharing I’m really starting to figure out what I want now Smiley smile
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  • Sarah
    Expert July 2021 Ontario
    Sarah ·
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    Thank you for sharing! I agree I don’t want to settle! It’s a tough decision honestly. We’re the same in that we already have two kids so we aren’t waiting for the next step either. I am just eager to “complete” our family and change my name! Hence eloping. We will decide within the week!
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  • Sarah
    Expert July 2021 Ontario
    Sarah ·
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    We are similar! Our original date was last august as well. I agree we’d do the elopement and let it go except yes we also have way too much money put into our venue so we gotta use it. I feel like with eloping we can look forward to the big wedding as more of a fun party and it would lift the stress a lot. Thanks for your input I’m def leaning toward eloping this year more and more
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  • Sarah
    Expert July 2021 Ontario
    Sarah ·
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    This is such a great way to put it. I also don’t want to wait all this time for a masked wedding. We’ve been together 10.5 years and have two kids so If I’m waiting for the big wedding I want it to be a good one too! Thank you!
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  • Kathryn
    Newbie May 2021 Alberta
    Kathryn ·
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    We pushed back our wedding from Auguat last year to this may. We're doing an elopement style with just our parents and siblings and then a big thing in the fall (by big I mean maybe 80 people max but we didn't have a big guest list to begin with). We decided that we just will keep pushing the party + vow renewal back because w have so much money tied up in deposits that it's worth it for us to have a party later on in life with all the money that's been put down PLUS you get to celebrate your marriage twice Smiley smile
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  • Daily
    Frequent user August 2022 Ontario
    Daily ·
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    I personally not a fan of wearing mask and I feel like it takes away the fun so i postponed my wedding a second time to August 2022. I’m legally married 7 years ago but we just never have a wedding. And I’m not waiting all these time just to have a mask wedding. At the end of the day, it is how you feel and what makes you happy.
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