To invite or not to invite new coworker

View quoted message Agreed! That is the vibe I’m getting on here

View quoted message Yeah, that’s what I’ll probably do!

View quoted message I did not do STDs for co-workers I will just be doing invitations closer.

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That's the thing about small offices, drama could start very quickly. I'll hold off on STD's for coworkers and invite them later on.

I would say hold off on inviting the new guy. If it comes to invitation time and he still works there and you get along, then give him an invitation. But I don't think you need to give him a save the date since you barely know him.

I would probably invite the new person, if you are not super close they may not even want to come. I work in an office of 16 and I am close with about half, I do not want to cause any drama though so I will invite everyone. They will only be invited to the ceremony and dance though not the dinner.

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I agree. I'd be discreet about the save-the-date and decide later if you'd like to invite him. Either way, I'd skip the save-the-date for him in case he doesn't last or you don't click.

Thanks all! I’ll probably skip stds for the 2 coworkers and send one to my old boss. Then when invites come out, I’ll have a better idea who’s invited

Best idea would be, be discreet with the STD's, maybe let your colleagues know to be discreet as well, then if you have developed a relationship with your new co-worker later on, feel free to invite him.

On the flip side, giving out a save the date mandates he get an invitation, whether you like him anymore or not, or if he's even still working there!! I'd play it safe.

When in doubt, the answer is no. You said it yourself, you'll be able to gauge your relationship by the time your wedding invites roll around. You can revisit it at that time. But to spend 100-200 bucks on a person just because they're new? He would totally understand if the roles were reversed.

Honestly Save the dates aren’t even necessary for your coworkers and I would honestly hold off. Who knows what can change, and if you do like him and send him a std and then he leaves the job and goes elsewhere and you don’t talk as much, it becomes awkward

I wouldn't do save the dates for coworkers at all (regardless of closeness with them). because things can change. if you decide to. I would send to their home. but don't include new hire.

decide when you do invites if you want to invite new hire or not.

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That's what I was thinking of doing for the owner, just send the STD to his house rather than the office. I might also wait until after the new hire's probation period (Beginning of February) to give out coworker STD's to see if he's likely to stay or not and if I want to invite him at that point (It would only be a few weeks after the other STD's get mailed out - plus they don't know anyone else on the guestlist).

The thing about the small office is that I talk about wedding planning quite a bit, and I don't want any assumptions made by the owner/new hire on who's invited.

Since save the dates aren't done by everybody I would personally send the STD's to their home addresses and not give one to the new hire. Who knows if he will even be there by the time of invitations? (Speaking from personal experience at my office...)

Then feel free to hand deliver the actual invitations but make sure to have the name on the invitation so it doesn't look last minute.