Rsvp's

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Yeah and that can be hard because she should feel like it's important too. Just doesn't make a whole lot of sense but I guess I won't be thinking about her on our day, so all good!

I haven't sent out the invitations yet, but I already know that my grandmother will not be attending. She's the kind of person who only leaves her house once a year to go to the Italian consulate and for funerals lol.

Don't take it so seriously. Your wedding IS important

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That's great advice! I will try to live by that. I probably won't be thinking about the people that didn't come on my day so you are right, I'll let it slide and just enjoy the wedding planning and the big day!

Thanks so much

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That's too bad! Sometimes we just have to roll with the punches.

And that is so true! We will have more cake and candy haha

We had some disappointing no’s. Both my husbands sisters, some childhood friends of mine. They were hard to swallow at first, but eventually we both stopped thinking about it so much. When our wedding day arrived, it was just so special to celebrate with everyone who was there, that we didn’t even think about the ones who couldn’t come. It does suck, and you can feel hurt that they aren’t coming, but don’t let it ruin your day. Have your grieving time and then focus on those who did say they would come!

I know for mine some of them just cant afford to make the trip from Alberta and Newfoundland to Nova Scotia. Although some of my aunts who i thought would come, have replied no. But whatever, more cake for everyone else, right?

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Thanks! I'm glad I'm not alone but hopefully it's not too bad for you!

Oh man too many problems with invites, rsvps and family drama. You are not alone. Try to concentrate on you and your fiancee

No feelings hurt and if your family don't want to answer your calls, Thats not right to you to make you feel that way.

View quoted message That's upsetting. I did the same thing with some of my cousins and got the rejections i thought but you have some hope you could be wrong.
That's sweet your grandfather is making the trek to see your special day.

We haven't really had any surprises from our families. I considered not inviting my cousins at all because I knew they wouldn't come except for one, but ended up inviting them anyway. I was right, only one cousin will be coming (out of 14). But my fiancé's grandfather surprised us by saying he would come (he's almost 95 and will need to travel 200 km).

I was a little hurt however to learn that my roommate wouldn't come. I understand that she had previous plans, but I can't help being sad.

View quoted message Thats's so frustrating. I just wish people would see it that this is our 1 special day and there's no way to make up for not coming for no reason.

For whatever its worth, my FH grandma keeps saying "I hope I make it there" even though she isn't sick or anything!

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Aww thank you so much! I've seen videos of people doing live streams for their sick parents or grandparents! So sweet! We will have lots of pictures to share and remember that day even with the people that aren't attending.

That's really hard, I'm so sorry you're going through that. I would suggest reaching out and seeing what the reason is. Maybe travelling is hard on them and they really want to be there, so maybe there's another way for them to be a part of your big day? (OMG a cute livestream!?) I hope it gets worked out, but like others have said, if they don't want to support you for your big day, it's their loss, not yours.

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She won't return my phone calls and my mom said the same thing so we both don't know why. I guess I will just let it go! Thanks for your input Jennifer!

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That's a good size guest list. Ours is around 100 as well. That is surprising the percentage of declines. wow!

You are probably right. There is probably a finance issue/ kids. The family drama can be hurtful when people can't get past it to be able to celebrate our one special day.

Thank you for your advice Brittany! I really appreciate it!

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Thank you, that put a smile on my face. I'll try to keep that in mind.

It is true though because if they don't care enough then I shouldn't either.

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Yeah it's hard not to when they won't even return my calls.

That is understandable for your situation. No hard feelings there.

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That's unfortunate for her. I can see how it may be hard to stay connected with her family. but if you have a close relationship with her. just give her a call and talk to her.
almost always people have reasons for not attending. and that's ok.

I think I'm going to have a hard time with this. They say to expect declines RSVPs from like, 30% of your guest list? But we aren't inviting the "B-listers"... we have pre-cut the guest list down to core people. We are currently at 103 people before invites are sent. So I'd be really surprised if many people decline, as almost no one is out of town and its mid-January...
For your BC fam, it could be that they can't afford the travel, or already have labour day long weekend plans... maybe some people with kids aren't wanting to travel before school starts... I would maybe reach out to people who you were expecting to come... at least so you know why.
As for your Grandma, if she has distanced herself from the family after your papa's passing, something else may have gone on with her and your older family members? maybe? Either way, that's rough, I'm sorry you're dealing with that.

I had some family decline that I wasn't expecting, but I wouldn't stress to much about it. If they are not able to share this special moment with you, then it is their loss, not yours.

Don't get down of your family declining. They may have prior engagements beforehand. You will see visit them sooner and see them. I know two of my cousins couldn't make it because of going through the U.S. citizenship and fighting a case which he can't leave the states at all.

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Yeah that's understandable if they already accepted another wedding. Family drama is complicated. She married my papa after my nana died and my papa recently passed and she refuses to have any connection with us since.. not sure why. She's been my grandma since I was 2 or 3.

There were definitely a few RSVP declines that had us a little offended at first, but most of them have other weddings the same day. Grandmas would hurt a little bit, but just ask her why - maybe her reason will surprise you