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Stefanie
Devoted August 2021 Saskatchewan

In limbo..

Stefanie, on April 12, 2021 at 01:38 Posted in Plan a wedding 1 41
Does anyone else just feel like you're waiting in limbo to know what your plans will be?

Our wedding is August 14 postponed from last year and as of right now we can have a 30 person ceremony only I think. I haven't sent any new invitations with not knowing what it may look like. So I'm trying to still work on my DIY stuff in the meantime although I've been having a hard time because of not really knowing what's going on. I feel like it will basically all be last minute planning. With not even knowing if we can have a reception I haven't met with the venue and decorating company to decide on linens. The waiting to finalize things is the toughest part right now.

How's everyone else doing?
However we did pick up our cake tasting this weekend (from a local nut free bakery!) and I've been working on painting table numbers so checking some stuff off the to-do list.
In limbo.. 1
In limbo.. 2

41 Comments

Latest activity by Jodi, on April 25, 2021 at 21:24
  • Jodi
    Newbie August 2021 British Columbia
    Jodi ·
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    MY situation is the exact same. We has a couple have ultimately decided to postpone but we can't actually do that with the venue until 2months ahead. Our date is Aug 1st so we are waiting until June 1st. However our venue Is pretty much fully booked for 2022 so we will likely wait until 2023. We booked the venue in 2019 so pre-pandemic, thinking we were planning ahead properly. I stopped all wedding prep since early 2020.
    Hope it works out for you.
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  • Kelsey
    Frequent user August 2022 Alberta
    Kelsey ·
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    Totally with you. We postponed from Sept. 2020, to August 2021, and now to August 2022. We sent out an email telling people to wait for info but to know we wouldn't be doing it this year. Our guest list is pretty big and we just really want to have a wedding with all our people. It's been so hard on both of our families we just want our wedding to be a big sigh of relief and a party.


    The limbo thing sucks. I was a few weeks away from my bridal shower when covid hit and I feel like ever since I've been so pessimistic about planning. Might need to go do a cake tasting to get excited haha. On the plus side we're excited to really zero in on our registry and know what we want.
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  • Jenna
    Newbie August 2021 Ontario
    Jenna ·
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    I hear you! We also would lose deposits so although we would love to elope, it’s not worth considering right now. If I could go back in time I wouldn’t have made all of these commitments and plans, we’re not considering moving to 2022 so we’re stuck with waiting for now! Hang in there Smiley smile
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  • Brittany
    Newbie June 2021 Ontario
    Brittany ·
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    I hope you can keep your guest list and your current date. I can't even imagine the struggle or sadness you are experiencing. Just stay strong and try and enjoy the last little bit of planning you have left. Regardless of what is happening in the world this is a beautiful time for you and your new family and you have to look at that as the positive. Wishing you all the best!

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  • Stefanie
    Devoted August 2021 Saskatchewan
    Stefanie ·
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    We are definitely not postponing and plan to get married either way! However it's just a matter of what actual plan looks like. We already have all our deposits down from pre-pandemic so unless they can't be used due to restrictions we risk losing those deposits. It really is just a matter of is waiting to have an idea of what it's going to look like. Right now our 30 person guest list is our immediate family and bridal party. It's just the waiting to know if we can include anyone else or even if a reception of some sort can be involved.
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  • Brittany
    Newbie June 2021 Ontario
    Brittany ·
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    My fiance and I are eloping. With the state of the world right now you don't know how many times you will need to keep changing your date, guest list, etc. My advice is talk with your fiance and put a plan together. If you both are on board to keep switching up your dates - then do that. If the stress is getting to you, talk about eloping. I understand it may not be your dream and some people will be upset with your decision but remember this - it is yours and your fiance's special day - nobody else's! Before we even got engaged we both agreed to elope. Our families are 100% happy with our decision because they understand it is OUR DECISION. We have talked to numerous people who had to change their wedding plans over 4 times and are still not married. You have to remember its you and this person forever so its not the wedding venue or the guest list that makes your special day. It is you and your best friend! Wish you the best of luck Smiley smile

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  • Stefanie
    Devoted August 2021 Saskatchewan
    Stefanie ·
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    I couldn't agree more. It is hard on so many levels. I was just talking to my MOH this morning that I think we are going to live stream with our officiant and I am going to make up my own invitation for that to email out and our link will be up on our website. If things change and we can change some of those to in person we will notify them as soon as possible.
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  • Samantha
    Newbie August 2021 British Columbia
    Samantha ·
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    In the same boat as everyone else! My wedding is August 21! I delayed planning all fall/winter due to covid but then realized things needed to be booked as vendors were filling up. Now 4 months to go and I’m gonna be scrambling with all the DIY decor and whatnot. Oh well I guess. 🤷🏼‍♀️ Our wedding is out of town so invitations are going out this week. We’ve already updated our website explaining covid is to blame for our guest list being downsized. We have no idea how many people we will actually be allowed to have so we are planning for best case scenario of 50. We are getting married on our 10 year anniversary so we will be married no matter what lol. I just hate all the limbo and stress around who and how many people to invite and how many guests we will be sending an “uninvitation “ to. Im sad that all of my family is 3 provinces away so I’m just hoping my mom will still be able to come somehow. For everyone else we will do a celebration next year back home.
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  • Jennifer
    Frequent user August 2021 Ontario
    Jennifer ·
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    🥰!


    We also splurged a little bit on some nicer things (fancy plates and chargers for the tables, a water fountain for the outdoor patio (which well give to my parents as a gift after the wedding) and even hired a jazz trio for the guests during cocktail hour!
    We feel that if it’s going to be an intimate wedding, we want it to feel as special and memorable as possible.
    We’re even considering hiring a videographer to capture our day so our guests who aren’t able to come can at least feel like they saw a part of it.
    Next year we plan to have a backyard catered party for all of our extended family who can’t come this year. It’ll probably cost about $3k but at least we have lots of time to save for it!
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  • Marissa
    Newbie October 2021 Ontario
    Marissa ·
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    Love this reply!
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  • Jenna
    Newbie August 2021 Ontario
    Jenna ·
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    I am in the same boat! August 21st wedding this summer is happening no matter what. We went from 140 to 50 guests and are waiting to send out invitations until June. Our wedding is out of town and travel and hotels definitely adds to the stress. Bachelor/bachelorette plans will likely have to be cancelled or postponed. If we can have 50 people it will be a blessing at this point! Excited to be married and move on with life Smiley smile
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  • Jennifer
    Frequent user August 2021 Ontario
    Jennifer ·
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    August 20th wedding coming up here!


    We got engaged in Covid and have stuck to our original date this year. We went from 160 to 50 tentative guests and have made many changes to our plans. One of the biggest reasons why I love my fiancé is yes content with anything, anytime. His whole family has seen hard times and grew up very poor so they’ve really got an amazing happy-go-lucky vibe on life.
    It’s made me more easy going with all the chaos and unknown (both in normal life and planning a Covid wedding).

    We both say “we’re going to have an amazing day no matter what”. And when I worry about how much I’ve compromised on the wedding, and may still need to compromise, I think to myself all the reasons why I can’t wait to BE married.
    Shifting focus back to what’s important has helped me feel positive no matter the outcome.
    I feel for you though! One day us Covid brides will tell our stories and laugh about what a beautiful mess we made in a dumpster fire!
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  • Kayla
    Newbie June 2022 Ontario
    Kayla ·
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    I can also definitely agree with everyone when it comes to the uncertainty and limbo feeling. My wedding is scheduled for August 28th 2021. Yesterday I decided it would be best for us to postpone the wedding to next year. I am a little worried about my contracts with the photographer and videographer. Our contracts states that if both parties are unable to attend the wedding due to COVID restrictions the deposit can be moved to a new date. I’m just not sure if because we’re choosing to postpone because of the uncertainty of restrictions, if that will effect my contract? Anyone else have experience with this?
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  • Jaime
    Newbie June 2022 Ontario
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    We had to postpone just now for our June 5th wedding. I would say wait until closer to the day to know what is going on. We tried to get a new date for the fall, but they were all gone, so our new date is next year--thankfully most vendors have moved with us.

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  • T
    Newbie July 2021 Alberta
    Taylor ·
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    Thanks for this comment - focus on the things that you can control. I needed to hear that today.

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  • Vinod
    Top August 2017 Ontario
    Vinod ·
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    The postponement feeling isn't worth to go through as Covid seems to overtake many decisions for many couples and planning processes. On the note of DIY projects, they look great and keeping busy during the time to do something at home. Just wait until 2 months to see what happens with the months prior and ask the company if replacements can be made if the date has to be changed on the invitations. Samples look tasty and hungry to try some LOL.
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  • Stefanie
    Devoted August 2021 Saskatchewan
    Stefanie ·
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    That is really upsetting. Thankfully last year when we postponed we had zero issues with our venue or vendors. And our venue for this year we don't have a minimum. Although I am pretty sure whatever government says is allowed they have to follow that regardless and can't charge a minimum attendees. I think it sucks if they don't give one a choice. We plan to go ahead no matter what this year after postponing already. It's just been to exhausting and I don't want to do it all over again.


    I hate that the wedding size is so unpredictable. We don't think it's going to be allowed yet it's so hard to really truly say as things seem to be constantly changing so quickly. I hope the venue works with you regardless when the time comes!
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  • Laura
    Frequent user August 2022 Ontario
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    We are supposed to be August 21, 2021 and booked literally everything in 2019 and 2020 (mostly pre-pandemic) because I just wanted to get everything secured so I wouldn't have to worry about it for a year or two. All my vendors except the venue (ughhhh) are flexible about postponing. The venue is making us wait until 60 days prior to the wedding to postpone, which means we aren't allowed to do anything until June 21st. Super frustrating since in our minds we do NOT want to go ahead with the wedding. Our contract said we would guarantee a minimum of 160 people, so the venue is insisting that if on June 21st the government says that weddings of that size will be allowed by late August then we have to go ahead no matter what. I think it's ridiculous because at this point it is seems pretty obvious a wedding of that size will not be allowed... but we just have to wait it out!

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  • Stefanie
    Devoted August 2021 Saskatchewan
    Stefanie ·
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    I am so glad I am not the only one. I am definitely focusing on the things I can control!
    Hopefully in time here we have a better idea on how things might look!!
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  • Desiree
    Frequent user August 2021 Ontario
    Desiree ·
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    In limbo.. 3
    Our wedding is aug 7( Was planned before covid) But we are still slowly getting ready but I'm
    Not enjoying it and we finally just order the invites today but with unknown it's so hard. Our guest list is only 50 people and my fiance doesnt want to postpone, he is good with some guest or no guest.
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  • Lauren
    Curious July 2021 Ontario
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    Yeah I've been blissfully ignoring all Covid news because it's just something I can't control, but last night it was really starting to get to me. Hearing about 18000 new cases a day by end of May doesn't fill me with hope for Ontario. I'm so sorry that your new date will almost definitely be impacted by what's going on right now.. I know when we rescheduled for 2021 there was no thought in our minds that Covid would still be a problem, and you probably felt that way too. It's so unfair and I'm so so sorry that you had to change so many of your plans, and it's possible that they may still be changing. My heart breaks for you and all of the May brides. The government has been talking about the vaccine like it's some miracle cure and now it's here but it isn't helping. I hope that whatever happens your wedding is beautiful with all your most loved friends and family and in the end you and your husband will be very happy with it. ❤️
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  • K
    Beginner August 2021 Ontario
    Karissa ·
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    I totally feel you! Frustration recently because we want to go out of Ontario for our honeymoon but not it sounds like that could be closed. Our date is Aug 27, and I would just prefer to try something new rather than a cottage! And not knowing how many guests, just planning for it to possibly be very little people. Hard to be optimistic with the way the government is handling.
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  • Sonja
    Newbie July 2021 Ontario
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    I feel hopeful for you to be able to have something nice by July. We rescheduled from August 14 last year to May 21st this year, cut back from 180 guests to 50, and moved everything to an outdoor venue .... apparently discussing harsher restrictions and possible stay at home order extension -_- We’ll be getting married that day regardless even if it ends up being immediate family only, but it’s still a little heartbreaking.
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  • M
    Newbie August 2021 Alberta
    Miranda ·
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    COMPLETELY understand your feeling- my date is August 14th as well, everything is basically ready, but we don't know what will happen in the end. Really trying to stay present and focused on what I can control but it is sometimes really hard to cope with this much uncertainty! You aren't alone and we will likely wait until June to make any big decisions to postpone or go forward.
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  • Lauren
    Curious July 2021 Ontario
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    My date is July 24 2021 in Ontario. We have already postponed from last year as well. To be honest, this wedding is happening regardless of what the restrictions are. This time around I'm just moving forward with the thought that it's happening because I can't do it any other way. It's too difficult to worry about something I can't control and can't predict.

    I know that we're in a full lockdown right now.. But if we go back to the colour-based restrictions (which I hope we do by the summer!! No more of this entire province nonsense), the toughest restrictions (grey) allows 50 people outdoors. I'm not sure if your wedding is outdoors but if it is, you are almost guaranteed a 50 person wedding no matter what. I know it's likely not what you imagined (us either.. Our shortened list is 85 and I honestly don't know how we'd narrow it down to 50) but at least it's something. It would probably be a really lovely day.

    Your cakes look DELISH and I can't wait to do my tasting! Your DIY stuff is super cute too! I know it's hard to want to confirm things and not be able to.. Try to worry about the things you CAN control. Music, timelines, what you want your hair/makeup to look like, invite design, signage, decor (if you want to find stuff online).. It's not what you had imagined I am sure, but I think you can do it!

    Feel free to DM me if you want to vent or need someone to bounce ideas off of. It can be therapeutic for sure!

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  • Stacey Tc
    Devoted August 2022 Saskatchewan
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    Got it 👌🏻

    Thanks for the clarification Smiley smile

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  • Christiana
    Super November 2020 British Columbia
    Christiana ·
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    I believe she was referring to another Ontario wedding, but yes rules are different depending on the province and sometimes even on the region of the province. Last I heard all people count toward the limit on private properties in Ontario. Staff would only not count if you're at a staffed venue. But I don't live there so I could definitely be wrong. Best to always just check with your local health authority for the most recent accurate information.

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  • Stacey Tc
    Devoted August 2022 Saskatchewan
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    Saskatchewan rules and Ontario rules are drastically different.

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  • Kristen
    Frequent user October 2021 Ontario
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    Just FYI any hired professionals present don’t count as part of the gathering. They follow different protocols than guests so they are not counted in the guest total
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  • Pauline
    Beginner August 2021 Ontario
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    Early July wedding here! We have been in contact with our Toronto venue and have been discussing 3 main options: 1. postpone by May (60 days out), 2. wait and see in May to decide if reception is still possible, 3. ceremony-only with takeout dinner. After the lockdown we will reassess the situation but we are pretty set on ceremony only at this point as we don’t feel comfortable hosting a reception in this current situation, and don’t really have confidence that things will be significantly better by July. So far I have seamstress, photographer, officiant, florist and makeup/hair booked. LOL so much for the wedding wire to-do list.
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  • Katelin
    Newbie August 2021 Ontario
    Katelin ·
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    I completely understand the frustration with the limbo state. We have our current date set for June 12th outside on a family farm in Milton, ON, and have invited roughly 35 people knowing that we might be limited to a 20-25 person reception, or maybe not one at all. We are currently struggling with getting it down to a 25 person event, including things like photographer, coordinator/planner, caterer. Hopefully, the Ontario situation looks a little better and things open up so we can still have our reception.

    I personally feel very optimistic about 25 people on June 12th. I think in June, you should be able to make a call about your August date with more certainty and information. My friend gave me advice in creating a pro/con list of postponing, or having an micro event. It was very helpful, and I definitely recommend it in order to help you think through situations.

    Best wishes for you and your partner, we feel you!

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  • Marsha
    Devoted July 2022 Ontario
    Marsha ·
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    I know your feeling so well, our first date was Aug 1 2021, i been flip-flopping and made the decision in feb that we would rather postpone for 2022, I even stopped visiting this site for few months but I am back. I feel great about out decision, We were going to still have a wedding and do it all over again next year with reception, but I am an all or nothing girl and i said na because once i get married that reception will not happen and walking down the aisle already married for me wont give me the same euphoria

    it will all fall into place, you will feel it in your gut

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