How to tell my bridal party that we're doing a "budget" wedding, and I can't really pay for their stuff?

With my bridesmaids I told them I was not paying for their hair but I would like them all to have it up. It was up to them whether they wanted it done, or to do it themselves. A few of them expressed interest in having it professionally done. I found a great hairdresser to come to us for a decent price per person, and let them all know. 3 confirmed and were happy I arranged it for them, and two decided to do theirs themselves. When you accept a role in a wedding party you are also accepting the money and time that goes along with it. That is why it is a question. I don't think it is unreasonable to ask them to pay for their own things, as long as you are not forcing super expensive options and services on them.

I have always covered my own hair and makeup as a bridesmaid. For me, it comes down to choice. If I have a say in how my hair and makeup are done, I’m fine with paying it myself. If I have specific instructions from the bride, I’m a little more annoyed when I also have to pay. I think it’s okay to give some stipulations ( all up or down, nothing too bold etc) but give your ladies some room to make the look their own. Also, let them know it doesn’t have to be mandatory. If they want to save money and do it themselves, that should be an option for them

We’re buying a house this year while we plan for this wedding in 2020 so we definitely wanna keep the best budget we can without sacrificing what we want. We plan on making the day all about us though, but I don’t plan on getting anyone for makeup and my sister (MOH) and I both are really good at makeup and we usually do our friends makeup for events already. I only chose 2 bridesmaids and my maid of honour so we don’t have much to do. And as for hair, I haven’t decided about that yet because I wanna go with simple, no big fancy Dolly Parton updo’s for me.. I gotta check some hair stylists out but keeping a budget I think we’re just going to get ready together and help each other and have a fun prepping together without a stranger with us.

View quoted message Thanks for this. I don't know enough about protocol but I'm in the same boat and won't be paying for their makeup and hair either. So this made me feel better lol.

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Oh yes, I'm definitely easy going when it comes to all that. The only thing I've asked is for them to run the dress by me first just because I know the general colour that we're going for. Otherwise it's all up to them! Same with hair and makeup and shoes. They know we have a photographer, so basically they're free to do whatever is comfortable for them and what they think looks good on them.

I was planning on buying each of them a special accessory though, as a thank you, and as a sort of memento.

I would just be upfront to them! Maybe just tell them basics like I would like your dresses to be _____ colour, when you find something please let me see it first! And same with hair and makeup just suggest an idea but maybe not an absolute?

I think it would be unfair if you demanded certain things (you have to wear this dress, these shoes, makeup has to look exactly like this and hair) and then force them to pay for all your demands.

If you keep it light and open I'm sure they will all be fine!

When you agree to be in someone's wedding, I would never assume that the bride would be paying for the dress, hair or makeup. Sometimes brides do pay for something as their thank you or just give them a simple gift. If people are accepting the role to be a part of your day they should expect the costs that come associated with it.

I've been in 12 weddings. and have always expected to have to pay myself to have my hair and makeup done. but with that being said, I've never been forced to have my hair/make up done. it was always optional. i would find them someone that could give them a fair price. and run it by them the cost.

I'm not paying for my wedding parties dress, hair or makeup either. I have gifts for them all (accessories for the wedding day, and a personal gift for each of them). None of them have expected me to pay for it.

Every wedding I have been in, I have expected to pay for those things. It's actually pretty standard.

As much as we would've liked to pay for our Wedding Partys attire, hair & makeup, its just not possible. I made a private FB group where I post what I'm up to, appts etc. I made a post for makeup with a link to artist with prices. Another post for hair listing appt times & salons requests like dry hair etc with price. I made it clear that hair & makeup are optional. I posted if anyone was interested, I'd make appts & that we'd pay the fee for 2 makeup artists to come to my Parents so their prices wouldn't change. I have my Mom, FMIL, 6 Girls + myself. All but 1 Bridesmaid signed up for hair and makeup. As far as the bridesmaids dresses, I worked my butt off to find a beautiful dress on a budget that fit our sz range XS -3X. I looked everywhere I could find because it was all I could do to help them. I ended up choosing 5 or 6 dresses that no matter which dress, the bridal shop set 1 price of $225.00 + tax. My Girls agreed on 1 dress (happpppy dance) & they paid their deposit. For shoes, I chose color & closed toe and asked for them to pick a comfortable shoe. They've found great shoes for between $20 - $49.99. I feel so guilty about the amount of money they have spent, I really do. When my Fiance got tux prices under $200 for everything including shoes, he felt horrible! I said compare that to the Girls & the Guys have it much easier! 5 Girls need alterations as well... I hope this helps.

Best tell them the TRUTH being friends/family members they should understand. My bridal party already know I'm not getting many items, that's just the way the cookie crumbs. Good Luck

Honesty is key! Besides, they are in your bridal party for a reason - they are your friends. As friends you should feel comfortable letting them know as well as they should have no problem with you not paying for their hair and makeup as long as you aren't requesting they get it professionally done and they can do it themselves.

Just be honest with them. All my girls are paying for their own dresses but will probably just do their own hair and makeup. My hairdresser (also been doing my hair for YEARS and is a friend) she is also attending the wedding. She will do my hair but idk if it's in the budget for me to pay for my girls too. So they can either pay themselves or just do it themselves. As for makeup we are all just doing our own. I'm possibly going to pay for the eyeshadow and lipstick but the rest of the makeup they can use their own. My girls aren't upset or offended by the fact they have to pay or do it themselves because they understand the financial aspects of it all.

I agree with Allison and Bianca; be honest with them upfront. As they are paying for their own dresses, they may have (hopefully) already assumed they'd have to take care of their hair and makeup as well. I'm sure they will understand and that also leaves the option for them to do either themselves if they opt to.

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I agree with Allison about being honest with your bridesmaids right away, that way there's no misunderstandings. I haven't been in any weddings, but my sister was in her best friends and had to pay for everything herself (including a flight from Toronto to Prince Edward Island!). So it's totally common to not be able to cover all the costs for the bridal party.

I would be direct and honest with them and let them know about the hair and makeup situation. Some may opt to DIY their hair and/or makeup and if any girl is really good at one or another, she might offer to help the others.

I'm a bridesmaid in one of my bridesmaid's wedding in 5 months and her wedding is very similar to yours - casual and budget-friendly. I'm on my own for hair and makeup and I'm gonna get my hairstylist who's doing my wedding hair to do mine for this wedding and then DIY my own makeup.

Also for my wedding, my maids are paying for their own hair and makeup, I paid for deposits but they will pay the rest.