Help! moh crisis!!

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This is really good advise.

As much as you can see her perceptions of the relationship/friendship might be inaccurate, they are her perceptions and feelings which can't be completely discounted.

Depression is like any other illness—you can’t know exactly how someone is feeling and dealing with it even if you have experienced it yourself. Her perception, even if inaccurate, is how she sees things and how she feels.

I would suggest apologizing to her for being too involved in your planning and not checking in with her (or, whatever it is that she was upset about). Ask her what you can do to be a better friend to her. And, ask what you can do in regards to wedding stuff with her (not talk about it, give her lots of notice, whatever she says works best for her). Ask her how she feels about being involved in your wedding. She may still want to be involved, she might not. Whatever she decides, ensure her you will still be there for her.

Depression is really difficult and part of the disease is backing away from social circles and activities. It may be really hard for her to leave the house some days, so do keep that in mind when you're asking her to go to these meetings with you.

If I you don't want to lose hope, I would suggest even writing her a message, since she isn't willing to meet you in person (if you haven' already), and reach out to her, maybe even go to her place and check-in. It may turn out great, but be prepared for it to go either way. Make sure to chat with her about her feelings, she may just need someone to listen and acknowledge her emotions. (Try to make this meeting about her, before jumping into your business).

Afterwards, you can bring up your wedding again, give her some options of which events to attend, and ask her to choose one or two. Make sure you give her lots of prep time for it, and maybe even a timeline or guide of what will happen (this will ease her anxiety). It is a lot of work, but something that she may need. Don't expect her to be a typical MOH, so lean on your other bridesmaids for extra support.

Best of luck to you and her!

Your a busy bride and she should understand that. She is going through a tough time and needs to focus on herself. Her excuses shouldn't shut you out as a friend. Its a tough decision on you to keep her on-board.

Making time to see friends is hard and we all experience that throughout our busy days. Once a week make plans to go for breakfast or lunch with her if thats makes her feel better.

It seems the other way around with her moods of depression. She has lost you instead of you losing her.