Bridal Shower????

View quoted message We had a backyard BBQ lunch social instead of a bridal shower. I didn't want people to feel like they had to give us even more gifts. It sometimes feels like a wedding is more about the pre-wedding gift giving/getting parties than the actual wedding itself. I also wanted a chance for everyone to meet and socialize.

Stephanie nailed it, the tradition was begun to "shower" the bride with gifts to help her start her home for her new family (traditional gender roles indeed!!). Bridal showers are usually hosted by someone other than the bride or her mother, such as a maid of honor or the whole bridal party. You do not need to have one, many couples are skipping this all together or having co-ed showers, or instead having a lunch or other get together instead of a gift giving party.

In the past, people tended (more often than not I think) to live with their parents until they married. So, women were starting their own household (again, traditional gender roles because of the time) from scratch and showers were a time to "shower" her with gifts for her home, advice, blessings etc.

That's my understanding anyway.

I am still honestly unsure and I've stood in a few weddings. The purpose I get is to congratulate the bride and shower her in gifts and love. I personally prefer a couple shower, both myself and fiance will be doing a combined shower where we can celebrate with friends from both sides!