Why am i not your bridesmaid?

I agree with Bianca and Brittany. You have your reasons for choosing your bridal party and didn't make the cut. You shouldn't have to give an explanation other than she is not.

I have a 'friend' who I had a falling out with 2 years ago and we've fell out of touch, of course once she knew I was engaged, she asked me the same question. When I told her I already picked my team, I told her I only had room for x many people and I wasn't adding "1 more" since I'm already unbalanced with my FH. I also know she wouldn't be able to afford it, and she always makes things about herself but I didn't want to hurt her feelings. We haven't spoken since but some people just want to be the centre of attention at someone else's event.

Maybe you could have her do a reading at your wedding so she feels included? If you want to keep your friendship, she should understand that it's not mandatory for her to be a bridesmaid to you. She might be hurt but she needs to respect your decision

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Absolutely what Bianca said. Major faux pas on her part! You picked your party for personal reasons, and you do not owe anyone an explaination for what those reasons are.

View quoted message I agree with this!

I had the same issue with a close friend that I had since grade school. I told her that although she wasn’t a bridesmaid, that we were wanting her to be incorporated in another aspect of our wedding (performing our wedding song). I said we were trying to incorporate as many loved ones into our ceremony to make it feel more special.

If she's truly your friend, then there shouldn't be anything for you to do in order to keep her

Never should that question be asked by any good friend you know. Instead, she should be happy for you and say let me know if there is anything i can help with or even take ypu out for lunch or dinner.

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I agree with Bianca... it's just plain rude to put someone on the spot like that, especially when she's pretty much trying to make you feel like, "why wasn't I important enough"...

I say explain your choice of bridesmaids has nothing to do with what she means to you, and that's it. You don't need to soothe her ego because she wanted to be a bridesmaid...

Also I've found many girls like the idea of being a bridesmaid, but once they get hit with the bill for the dress, the shower, the bachelorette, etc.... They show their true colours of understanding the real commitment.

That's really unfair of her to put you in the position where you feel like you have to justify your decisions regarding your wedding party. I would just tell her that your reasons are private and are not personal towards her.

Sounds like she just wants to be included. Try to explain it was a difficult choice to be begin with and about your budget. Honorary bridesmaid also seems good

Honourary bridesmaid? Or perhaps let her know that she will still be invited to the bachelorette party? It's just something for the most part that she will have to come to terms with unfortunately.