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Curious September 2021 Ontario

What to do?

Darlene, on April 6, 2021 at 18:56 Posted in Plan a wedding 0 6

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We are planned to get married on September 25th of this year. We postponed last years date. My mother in law is battling cancer and is not doing well. We are unsure that she will make it to September.
We are thinking of moving the wedding up to a small backyard wedding but now we are in the third wave and have so many restrictions. My mother in law is also hoping that the wedding will be a chance to have her children at the wedding which she hasn’t seen in over a year due to covid. If we move the date her children won’t be able to make it due to the restrictions.
If we do go forward with moving to a closer date my fiancé doesn’t want to do anything after covid calms down. I’m so torn as to what we should do. We want our parents to be apart of the wedding. What are your thoughts?

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6 Comments

Latest activity by Vinod, on April 7, 2021 at 13:57

Top August 2017 Ontario
Vinod · On April 7, 2021 at 13:57
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Its heartbreaking to hear the battle of your MIL and your wedding plans put on hold if things don't go through as planned. Pushing the wedding to an earlier date with her present will have the ease of mind with parents along side and anyone else you wish. Zoom or live streaming as suggested would have your MIL feel better to see them and your ceremony. A reception can be held later with a photo of her.
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Featured September 2021 Ontario
Hank · On April 6, 2021 at 23:20
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I can see how it's mentally draining to constantly try to keep up with different rules, and the idea of doing it again just isn't for everyone.
If it looks like your MIL can make it past April, I would try to hold off until then so that more of the immediate family can attend. But if there's any indication that this emergency brake shut down will stay beyond Apr 30, you and your fiance should be prepared to make a decision to go ahead anyway or wait.
I'm so sorry you're going through this.
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Curious September 2021 Ontario
Darlene · On April 6, 2021 at 19:34
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Thanks for your input. I think you’re right about even if we do wait until September. It’s not going to be the same regardless.
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Curious September 2021 Ontario
Darlene · On April 6, 2021 at 19:32
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Thanks Kim. I want more than anything for her to be there but I know she will also be heartbroken that her other children won’t be able to come. The zoom is a good idea. My fiancé is opting out of anything else once covid dies down. He only wants to have one wedding.
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Christiana · On April 6, 2021 at 19:32
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That's a really tough situation and I'm sorry you're having to make these kinds of decisions.
If having all of your parents be at your wedding is one of your top priorities then it sounds like you should have it sooner rather than later. Unfortunately that means your partner's siblings may not be able to come. There isn't really a viable option to have it both ways without taking some big risks. If you decide to postpone there's no guarantee your MIL will be there for it or even that restrictions will be eased to the point where everyone you want there can be there.
I hope you figure out something that works for you and your partner.
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Devoted June 2022 British Columbia
Kim · On April 6, 2021 at 19:26
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That sounds like it will be a really personal and intimate decision that you and your fiancé make, and a difficult one.
That being said, here's what I think. I would say push up the wedding to sooner so that you are able to your MIL there. If you're unable to have her other children there, what about live streaming it for them and having a zoom party afterwards? I know it's not the same as them being there, but I would personally feel awful if something were to happen to her and she wouldn't be able to make it in September. If you go that route, then I understand that your fiancé would want to wait for the party until things have cooled down.
I wish you both luck in figuring it out!
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