Hey!
I am completely torn between two venues... And although I have made a pros/cons list, I still can't decide.
Bit of a backstory: When I originally got engaged, my immediate thought was to have it on my family's farm (obviously a rustic/outdoors theme). But, my mom didn't like the idea of doing everything mostly ourselves and the responsibility that comes with hosting etc. (fair enough). So, after that conversation and the realization that we couldn't do that, I began to look for venues. We hope to marry in late Sept / early Oct with about 100 guests, give or take 10.
First venue: Private gardens
Pros: A private venue 'gardens' that has different areas for the ceremony, cocktail hour and reception. Natural greenery backdrop and rustic arbor for the ceremony. Lots of space for guests mingling outdoors and lots of photo opportunities (and nice ones too, there's a carriage on site and photo wall already). Nice rustic building for the reception and I would need to do miminal extra decorating (other than personal touches). Includes table/chair setup/breakdown, microphone setup, bartending, really everything except the normal stuff, ie no catering, photographer, dj etc. Chairs don't need to be covered too, as they are nice already.
Cons: It costs 11k (tax in). Bar service is 8.50$/drink with only 2 options: cash bar (and she really means cash, you can't pay with debit/credit for the bar) or consumption bar (open bar). However, you can set your price for how much you want to pay then switch to cash bar once we reach that threshold. No catering available, she has 'preferred caterers', and she won't share them until you agree to have the wedding there, but she is a very nice lady and I believe her when she says they run anywhere from 30-40$ a head. No bridal suite available, but there is a spot for me and my party to 'wait' before the ceremony (a she-shed with wicker detailing, it's nice, but you can't get ready there...). Reception ends at 12-1230 (she hasn't decided yet on whether they're scaling back or not), which for me and my family, who are partiers, seems early. So overall, with catering included (and we don't exactly know the price yet), it would be around 20k most likely for just the venue and catering. Possible $22,000 if we treat our guests to some free drinks. The dancefloor gets expanded by removing some of the tables. The reception space is small in that sense. We likely wouldn't make any money and not have as much for a nice honeymoon.
Second venue: Hall at a curling club (a nicer one than what you would think hearing that right off the bat lmao)
Pros: The price is right. 5k for the venue/ceremony/bridal suite and decorating fees (which I mean chair covers, linen fees, their time for the decorating / extra rentals she makes you pay for) all in. They do ALL the catering in house (so we can't bring in our own late snack etc., which is kind of a con). But, for a decent buffet meal we'd pay $33 a head (with gratuity/tax ends up around $6500 ish), plus maybe $1300 for late night snack and another, say, 1000$ for h'or deouvres. So there would be $8800 ish. They have all the options for bar. Toonie bar, cash, tickets, consumption. We love the idea of a toonie bar to save money and treat our guests at the same time. Drinks are $6.50/drink. So, overall, for that would be $13,800 plus bar maybe $2000 to be safe, so $15,800. Reception can go until 1am. If we go with this option, we would save $ and be able to afford a nice honeymoon and our parents would save money too.
Cons: It's at a curling club so there are not as many photo opportunities. Wedding ceremony background wouldn't be as nice (although it is a treed background). So we would 100% have to go elsewhere for special / nicer pictures. The ceremony space is kind of plain, so we'd have to do a lot more of our own decorating to make it nicer (where as venue 1 you don't need to do much). The decor is kind of dated? She seems to use bright white chair covers, which I kind of think are tacky looking, but she says she's hoping to get in some more neutral chair options for next year, which would be nice. The reception space is massive, so in her pictures the tables look small (and therefore I'd need larger centerpieces to fill the space imho). The reception space has sound buffers around the edges which kind of catch your eye in, not a bad way, it just kind of takes away from the rustic feel. The other place it's rustic everywhere you look.
Everyone is saying just do what you want, but I'm a fairly practical person. I thought I wanted the garden place, but not thinking about the money we would save if we went with this other spot is quite alot and it's quite nice in itself as well. Just might take a bit more decorating (which I don't mind, and we could probably afford nicer flowers etc if we did go with this place.
I also don't want to regret my decision. Do we spend the extra money to have better photos on site? I love the outdoors and gardens, but they won't be as nice in October than when we saw it even just 2 weeks ago now. I don't know. I do know that our family's like to party and so the extra time is great at the club.
Has anyone experienced all this overthinking and not knowing what to do? Taking any and all thoughts here, but if you can avoid the 'at the end of the day it's what you want' notes, that would be great as I already know that and truly don't know what is better!
Thank you in advance 
