Wedding party regrets?

No regrets thankfully. We chose the right people and happy with our small number and locally too.

I had 2 Absentee MOHs who have been my best friends for 15 years, I moved to Ontario in October and we got married in Ontario, my MOHs found out 2 weeks before the wedding they couldn't come (we planned the wedding in 6 weeks so a lot of people couldn't come, one MOH is 6 months pregnant and the other wasn't able to get time off work to fly in. they were both still super involved with the wedding planning, as was my Mum who was in the UK until a week before the wedding. It was difficult to involve them in the wedding planning, perhaps give them some detail to help plan that they will be able to do online? this might make you feel like she's more involved. With the friend who isn't in the bridal party, I would give him a special mention in a thank you speech, maybe if you are doing bridal party gifts your could include him in that, it would set him aside from the other guests

Sorry about your regrets, ,, . My daughter that I'm closest to is MOH standing beside me my oldest daughter MOH standing beside her sister, then my daughter in law to be in Sept next then my sister in law (sister) last. Then Bestie is Flower girl, then granddaughters as 2 Ring Bearers.

The groom has his nephew as bestman, My Oldest son Groomman #1, My youngest son #2 THEN HIS OTHER NEPHEW as #3 sorry for upper caps I'm just wiped just got home from work.

I'm really sorry you're feeling that way about your bridal party. I ended up only going with a MOH (my sister), and FH went with 2 best men (two of his closest friends). I sometimes regret that I didn't have a larger bridal party since the excitement doesn't always seem to be there.

Try to trust your choices and hope that everything turns out well, I'm sure it will

I'm sorry to hear about your regrets. Consider asking the close friend who's been helping to do a reading...and maybe even give her something to wear in her hair to have her stand out as a significant friend?

View quoted message I totally get how hard it is to have that distance. I live in BC and the entire wedding party is in Ontario!

I would like to ask my cousin to be in my bridal party - we used to be best friends and then drifted apart quite a bit when she started making bad life choices and then got pregnant, but now its been 2 years and we are back to where we were before! I would love to have her standing next to me on the big day but I know she is super irresponsible with her money and cant afford anything, so im hesitant to ask her because of that. so we will see when it gets closer to the wedding maybe

This is something that bothered us quite a bit, when we first got engaged and we decided to nix the whole idea of having a wedding party. Being in the middle of planning a wedding from a distance (living in Alberta, getting married in Québec), I understand your frustrations and potentially hers too!

I think as long as the lines of communications are open, and that the level of expectations are modified to accommodate for the troubles that can come with a long distance groomsmaid, it'll work out just fine!

I would encourage you to speak with her about your concerns. I mean, I'm sure she has similar concerns about not meeting your expectations or not being able to be there for you two, as much as she'd like!

Happy planning and I hope it works out

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No way! That's pretty crazy! I'm sorry your friend allowed her jealousy to ruin your friendship. Her loss.

We're not at a point where cutting people is necessary, but with our "groomsmaid" living in the UK, it has definitely been inconvenient and frustrating for us.

If you will not be 100% happy with who is standing by you on your wedding day then fix it! It sucks and is awkward kicking someone out of the wedding party trust me I know!
When I got engaged I knew exactly who I wanted and I asked them and they all said yes and it was great..for a bit. About month or so later my MOH started acting so rude to me because she was jealous about how she wasn't engaged and I was. Her jealousy to our of hand and I asked her to step down as MOH and just be a bridesmaids, she agreed. However her bad attitude didn't go away and I eventually asked her to just attend as a guest. Some more things happened and she ended up getting taken off the guest list completely all because she was jealous.
She showed her true colours and luckily it was early on in the engagement so I didn't ruin any wedding plans. I don't regret it at all. Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do.
Talk to your fiance and do what feels right.

Definitely feel you on this. We just have my Maid of Honour and his Best Man, but they've not been any help at all. Me and my FH are doing everything, despite asking for help, and now I wish we hadn't had any attendants.

I do feel this sometimes. One of my bridesmaids *might* be moving to Newfoundland this year for a job. Her family would still be in Southern Ontario so my wedding would be an excuse for her to visit them too. This is the bridesmaid that is financially unstable too, so we've had some tough discussions about money, but we're on the same page now and she's stoked about everything again! She's the only one who I thought might be better off not in the party, but now I can't imagine not having her!

My MOH is going through a rough patch so right now her energy isn't in the wedding, which is understandable. I'm more frustrated at her situation and wish there was more I could do to help her, but I'm chatting with her today and she's doing better so yay!

Other than that, I don't have regrets, even though everyone is all over the place! None of us live in the same city but we are making it work. They are all important to me so even if the only thing they can do is stand up with me, I have come to terms with it.

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We're just going to let it be. We just wish we had thought it through a bit more before asking her.

She has already bought the dress. Whats complicated though is the dress is at our place and we're trying to figure out the best way to get it to her. It will need alterations.

Its really expensive to send it to the UK. We could give it to her Aunt here in Winnipeg, and she could bring it to BC, but what if she doesn't end up going to BC? What if she forgets to pack it? We could mail it to her family in BC and hope she goes there and has time to get it altered while there. There's a lot of "what ifs" happening here.

Honestly? I have thought about it, and there were some - but now the person in question has stepped up and I don't regret asking at all!

With your situation though I would say that with the distance being such a big deal, I wouldn't think it's the best idea to have her in the wedding party. Does she already have her dress? I mean, if she does - then I would just leave it be and on your wedding I'm sure it will be like she never left. But if she hasn't, maybe you could reason with her that as much as you love her, she just can't be there for you in the planning stages but you would love her to be a honourary Bridesmaid/Groomswoman. This can be announced at the wedding btw as well as in the timeline card things if you have them.