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Nicki
Newbie September 2020 Ontario

Uninviting Guests

Nicki, on July 20, 2020 at 17:08 Posted in Plan a wedding 1 17

Just looking for suggestions on how to uninvite guests. We have to text everyone this week and let them know we are downsizing to 30 people but I don't know what to say. Thanks in advance!

17 Comments

Latest activity by Cassandra, on July 28, 2020 at 12:25
  • C
    Beginner August 2020 Alberta
    Cassandra ·
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    All great suggestions already! Whatever you choose to say, your friends and family will totally understand, maybe not right away but eventually! Covid-19 has really shaken up everyone's way of life. You could also have them on one of the meetings like Zoom, or the google one, even the facebook video call that way they get to see you & still be a part of the day, just not in person!

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  • Leah
    Curious April 2022 Ontario
    Leah ·
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    Hey there! I uninvited my international guests for my wedding, I had a note with our save the date emails that said something like “while it is our deepest wish for you to be with us on our wedding day, for health and safety reasons we feel this will not be possible.” People need to understand as it’s their health and safety you are protecting, and the risk of someone at a wedding spreading Covid is still a possibility, and just not worth it. We also will plan two trips when it’s safe to do so and have mini celebrations where our families are from. So it gives them something to look forward too and also includes them in our celebrations too.
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  • T
    Curious August 2021 Ontario
    Trish ·
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    To each their own...lol

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  • P
    Newbie September 2020 British Columbia
    Paige ·
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    Oh gosh I wouldn't recommend lying and saying it's immediate family only if it isn't. That would just break my heart because you know people are going to find out otherwise as soon as any photos are posted and probably feel awful. Don't offer more details than you have to especially when they're false details.

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  • T
    Curious August 2021 Ontario
    Trish ·
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    I think this is great; and I genuinely think people will understand given the circumstances.

    I would just maybe add..

    "It breaks our hearts to say it, but because of the COVID gathering restrictions, we've had to completely change our wedding to a super small gathering of immediate family members in order to get married this year."

    Kind of clears up that they're no longer invited and it's just your families (even if that isn't the case)... shh lol

    Good luck - and I'm so sorry you've had to downsize. What a crazy time!!!

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  • J
    Beginner July 2022 Nova Scotia
    James ·
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    I think people will understand how unprecedented these times are. Some may even feel relieved because they may have been nervous to attend a gathering.
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  • Amanda
    Expert July 2022 Ontario
    Amanda ·
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    That is a great idea as well. You can e-mail or phone your venue to ask about the connectivity and to make sure that they will allow the phone or the camera man (whoever is doing the live stream) to connect to the internet for that use. They usually have no problems for it!

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  • Nicki
    Newbie September 2020 Ontario
    Nicki ·
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    Thank you, I'm thinking I might come up with a short message and then send them to the wedding website for up to date information if we decide to stream (we aren't sure since the venue is in a more rural area so not sure what kind of connection we will have). I appreciate you giving me some ideas! Smiley smile

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  • Amanda
    Expert July 2022 Ontario
    Amanda ·
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    Have you thought of doing a live video of your wedding so those guests that aren't invited can still watch, and then possibly send out something like this...

    Due to COVID-19 we were unable to have the wedding we hoped for this year, and have downsized to just immediate family. It breaks our heart to not have all of our family & friends present, but we want to thank you for all your love and support through this challenging time, and during this tough decision we've had to make.

    We hope you can join us for our Virtual wedding, to allow us to feel that you are still with us on our big day.

    No matter what you decide I hope it works out well for you girl! Smiley heart

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  • Nicki
    Newbie September 2020 Ontario
    Nicki ·
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    This is great! Thank you so much Smiley smile
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  • P
    Newbie September 2020 British Columbia
    Paige ·
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    This is what I sent everyone:

    Hey (name)!

    It breaks our hearts to say it but because of the Covid gathering restrictions we've had to completely change the wedding plans to a super small gathering in order to get married this year.

    We really wish we could have you all and if we decide to celebrate next year we will be sure to let you know.

    It's not going to be the wedding we pictured without all of our loved ones but everyone's health & safety is most important to us.

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  • Sara
    Beginner September 2020 Ontario
    Sara ·
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    Maybe first double check who would want to still attend under the circumstances. I’m on the same boat and I know some people will already not attend which makes down sizing a little easier!
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  • Jenny
    Beginner October 2020 Ontario
    Jenny ·
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    We are totally in the same boat. We want to invite our whole list in the event things open up more but I really want to avoid having to tell people who RSVP'd that they can't come. Such a hard call.
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  • Nicki
    Newbie September 2020 Ontario
    Nicki ·
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    We are planning a wedding celebration (almost like a stag and doe since we also had to cancel that) in the New Year so definitely a good idea to bring that up! Thanks for your help Smiley smile
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  • Nicki
    Newbie September 2020 Ontario
    Nicki ·
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    We haven't decided if we are going to zoom/Facebook live yet but definitely something to mention! Thanks Smiley smile
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  • Hank
    Featured September 2021 Ontario
    Hank ·
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    Are guests able to join you virtually? If so, that's a detail you can add to your invite rescind to help soften the blow.

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  • Amelia
    Master October 2020 New Brunswick
    Amelia ·
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    Are you doing any kind of celebration later? If so I would say "as much as we want to share our day with everyone we love, the celebration of our love has been postponed to 202X" you don't need to mention that you're still getting legally married this year if you don't want to.


    If you aren't doing anything later I would say "we have had to make the difficult decision to reduce the number of people present at our wedding due to covid restrictions. We hope that we can celebrate with you/both of you/you and your family another time".
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