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Rebecca
Frequent user October 2018 Ontario

Stag & Doe or Wedding Shower???

Rebecca, on January 12, 2018 at 16:44 Posted in Before the wedding 0 11
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I’m torn! I don’t know if I should do a stag and doe or a wedding shower ! I could do a wedding shower and the fiancé can have a stag? I want to go with whatever would be best and of course most beneficial 🤷🏻‍♀️

11 Comments

Latest activity by Rawr, on January 20, 2020 at 17:41
  • Rawr
    Newbie October 2022 Ontario
    Rawr ·
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    SO i am wondering if you did that or not? I need advise on that too as well. Nobody seemed to of answered it?

    So did you do it? and how did you go about that? donations etc?

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  • Jessica
    Frequent user September 2018 Ontario
    Jessica ·
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    We are doing a stag and doe because its just something you just do where i am from. But my bridesmaids are also throwing me a bridal shower on top of a bachelor /bachelorette, were doing it all Smiley smile

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  • Vinod
    Featured August 2017 Ontario
    Vinod ·
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    Our friends locallly put a buck & buck for us and no wedding shower as the event was to help our wedding. We appreciarted allthe work and efforts and still love them as family.
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  • Vanessa
    Expert August 2018 Manitoba
    Vanessa ·
    • Dispute
    We're having a wedding social similar to a stag and doe. Also a wedding shower and the parties as well.
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  • Tiffany
    Devoted October 2017 Ontario
    Tiffany ·
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    We had both! Bridal Shower - Stag & Doe (Jack n Jill) - and separate bachelor & Bachelorette parties! Smiley ring Smiley heart
    But not everyone was invited to the shower - it was just a close family & friends.
    The Jack and Jill was open to anyone - family, friends, coworkers, friends of friends etc.
    the Bachelor & bachelorette parties were pretty well bridal party only.
    But you can do any of these parties however you want!

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  • Kristine
    Frequent user October 2017 Ontario
    Kristine ·
    • Dispute

    I had a wedding shower hosted by my SIL (who was also my MOH) and my MIL.

    I didn't want to do a stag and doe, I didn't want to ask for so many gifts from everybody, especially because we had done an engagement party.


    We did also have a bachelor/bachelorette


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  • Ap2017
    Super September 2017 Ontario
    Ap2017 ·
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    Doing both may be a lot for your guests, but if you have a larger social circle that would be willing to attend everything, I'd say go for it. We had a smaller wedding, so it would have been too much to ask from our friends and family. I also didn't want to plan one more event around the wedding! We had a shower, but we created a honeyfund registry for our honeymoon and ended up getting cash gifts, so that's an alternative option as well!

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  • Kait
    Curious August 2018 Ontario
    Kait ·
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    You could totally do both Smiley smile

    My fiancé and I are doing the stag and doe because he knows SO many people, so it’s a great way to get support from your friends and community. I’ve just told him that he and his men can plan it, because I’m more focused on wedding planning (which he doesn’t have too many opinions on) so it works for us.

    The bridal shower, you basically just give your list of who you would like there, but it should be thrown by either family, or by your bridesmaids. For me, my mom and mother-in-law will be hosting it Smiley smile
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  • Holly
    Expert June 2019 Ontario
    Holly ·
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    Stag and does are more of a fundraiser and are only beneficial when you know a lot of people! We are doing a joint shower and having a bachelorette/bachelor each. This way we get the "gift benefits" of the shower, plus we get to have that celebration together and we also get our own celebrations seperate.
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  • Stephanie
    Master July 2018 Alberta
    Stephanie ·
    • Dispute

    Either one someone else should be putting on for you. Stag and does are meant as a fundraiser for the wedding (popular in some areas but not others). Typically there are games, food, drinks, dancing, door prizes. Anyone can come if they buy a ticket.

    A shower is typically for those closest to the bride (although couple showers are becoming more common!) It is a time when people bring gifts for the couple. Although there are other options for showers now for cash instead or something.

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  • Michelle
    Curious September 2018 Ontario
    Michelle ·
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    From my knowledge typically a stag and doe is for raising money to put towards your wedding; and a wedding shower (i'm assuming same as bridal shower but both men and woman are invited?) is something your friends or family throw for you, as a way for you both to start your new life together with nice gifts for your home.

    Not sure if this helped but I hope it makes it easier for you to decide 😊
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