Special Requests for guests

We are having an unplugged ceremony

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Or hire a security guard

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The teacher in me secretly wants the coordinator to go around with a basket collecting phones from people who have them out lol

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Officiant announcement is the way to go. Make sure to have your coordinator play enforcer in case some people think they're above the rules.

I think my only two big requests are:

1.) No cameras or phones out during the ceremony. As someone else mentioned, some guests have no spatial awareness and get in the way of the professional photographer and/or videographer. I'm not paying all of this money just to get pictures of people standing in the aisle with their huge IPads on full display.

2.) No kids. I only have a few friends who have babies/small kids so I don't think it'll be an issue with them. However, I have some cousins with kids and my fiance has a lot of cousins with kids. I've put on our wedding website that children are not allowed but I do worry someone might try to sneak one of them in.

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I'm requesting no cameras or phones during the ceremony, too! I've seen one too many times where people have gotten in the photographer and videographer's way with their IPads and IPhones. I was thinking of putting up a sign for people to see as they entered the venue but then my fiance made a great point that a lot of people probably won't even read it! So we are going to have the officiant make an announcement before the ceremony starts.

View quoted message That was my plan lol. For me this is my 2nd wedding and during my 1st, everyone around felt that their opinions were more valid then the bride and grooms. In the end we ended up having a religious ceremony that neither one of us followed. The sterotypical plain decorations, events & attire that either one of us were interested in, and at the last minute my parents (who had offered to pay for the food and 1/2 of the booze as a wedding gift) changed everything and decided they were going to do everything themselves with what they wanted, but had no plan or idea what they were doing and completely ruined the dinner & had nothing but beer and water for drinks.


So when my fiancée said he didn't care what the wedding was like as long as it was fun & he was dressed up like a knight with armour & a cape, I ran with it lol

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Omgsh medieval theme is so cool!! I'd love that, you can have so much fun.

I'm planning on setting a dress code, but am having a medieval theme and am sure sure how to word this....I'm not expecting people to necessarily go rent a costume, just try to stay within the realm of fashion-style as possible.


Other than that people don't just get a plus 1. I'm having a wedding of 40 people, so if your name isn't on the invite, then they're not invited or welcome.

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Exactly it's their day/our day and we just need the support. She also brought up that I did not ask her to be a bridesmaid, but I was going to, but she kind of went off on me saying she had to many weddings to go to and that she didn't think she would be able to come, that was before I told her it was 2023 and not 2022. She got the invitations; she just doesn't get a plus one and hopefully she will come and share my special day. It's our day leave out the drama and support each other.

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HAHAHAHAHA! I agree, love that look! But not for this wedding lol

I mailed out 80% of our guests and the rest through the website. Out of 120 people, only 7 people have RSVP'd so far. (3 by mail, 4 online). Super exciting!! I keep checking my mailbox and the website to see if the numbers have changed LOL. I met with some friends the other day that told me they received the invite but haven't replied yet. I know that most will most likely reply in Feb or March.

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Oh ya for sure website will work.

Exciting that your invites went out!! How do you find the replies from people, are they coming in?? We had a small wedding so only ended up mailing out like 12 invites or so and everyone pretty much confirmed back via text and/or call haha but I hear the frustration from some brides are here about how longggg people take to rsvp.

PS : For the record, nothing wrong with combat boots and leather jackets - personally love that style lol just..........would not be an option for a wedding I would be attending haha unless it's like a badass rock n roll couple and that's their theme and it's totally okay to do so and obvious haha!

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Thank you!! My invites went out already but trying to figure out how to word that on the website maybe?? Not too worried about MY side just those odd few

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Yes crossing my fingers for you, not an easy decision but she could be regretful if she does not come.

I have a close friend who I made the light assumption I would be in her bridal party but her numbers were tight and she wanted even numbers on her side to her fiancés side so long story short I wasn't asked but I did not make a fuss. I was surprised but did not want to make her feel bad or give her extra stress, so we attended her day and made it all about her cause I just think that's the right thing to do.

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Lol haha oh gosh well even though it is "suppose" to be about everyone just being there and being present lol I think if there is a dress code it should be respected, period. Sounds like it would be a good idea for you to list it on invites - that way at least people can't say they didn't know and hopefully those understand that combat boots does not exactly fall under "cocktail attire" "black tie" - whatever you choose to have lol Crossing my fingers for you!

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Omgsh the IPad...

I am always so surprised when people do not respect the wishes of the bride and groom for their day. I have to say, recently I attended a close friends wedding and she requested no phones during ceremony and I actually loved being "unplugged" and fully watching without any distractions - there was that much more sentiment for me.

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At first she was upset, but then she understood, still hasn't invited me to meet him. We will see if she RSVP's yes.

We've been friends for 16 years but since Covid we hardly see each other or talk much, but I still love her and hope she does come.

We haven't made any special requests but I'm seriously thinking about it - Dress Code!

Me & FH had a talk last night about a few items and it seems some of his guests are not too informed about wedding etiquette. Or as HE put it, clueless. Then mentions he thinks one guest may show up with his leather jacket and combat boots!

No requests so far, although it is one of the reasons we went with a buffet....

I requested no photography during the ceremony. I personally find it distracting and rude, especially when people bring big iPads and stick them out while disrupting other people's view. The worst is when they get in the photographer's way. How annoying is it that someone thinks they can get a better shot on their cheap phone camera over a paid professional. One person walked up to the altar at my sister's wedding holding a tablet and it was embarrassing.

Most people complied but I did notice a few snuck in a few shots here or there.

View quoted message Oh absolutely! Since everyone knew we were getting married at a winery, it was pretty common sense!

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Wow I am shocked at half not following it! And good for you for sticking to your guns at no plus 1, probably wasn't the easiest for you to do but if that's how you feel than that's most important on your day. Hope it did not cause issues with you and your close friend!

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I can appreciate a dress code! Did you find most people respected it?

We just had a dress code

These aren't weird requests; I think adding a dress code is important and helpful for the guest to know what they should be wearing. My friend did that for her wedding, 50% wore what they wanted and the other 50% followed through.

I put my dress code and I also did the no kids, mind you most of my guest have grown children and the two of the groomsmen have babies, we gave them the okay to bring them, but they both said no, this was their night for a kid's free day. I also did a no plus 1, which sparked a few issues with some of my guests, but the thing is, If I've never met your partner, why would they be invited versus someone I knew? We have a small wedding and I had to cut a lot of people who I would love to have there, but the budget just wasn't there. She is one of my closest friend and has been dating this guy for 5 years and I've never met him, the pictures I've seen of him are half of him. So I don't what him there when I could have a cousin instead or another friend.

Only request we got was Gluten free option, not to force speeches and not garter toss.