Should I invite my parents?

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I'm glad you've come to a conclusion you're comfortable with. I think at least an invitation will stop any comments down the road of "well, we weren't even invited to the wedding..." Just in case they are somehow able to seek out forgiveness and reconciliation once you are married and no longer "living in sin" (as my uncle put it when he found out my bf/FH and I were living together).

Good luck with the wedding, and your parents, and siblings. I wish you the best!

Oh ladies, thank you so much for all your responses. I really do appreciate it and it’s so nice to see that I have choices i.e. some friends have gone down the route of “but they are your parents; you have to invite them” I’m tired explaining this and the fact that this started nearly 20 years ago..aww. I am the sort of person whose conscious of what other people say etc so I’ll invite them. As some of you said, the ball is in their court then and if they don’t come, I know I’ve reached out and that’s the final reaching out I’ll be doing. I’m more hurt at the fact at how long they’ve disapproved of my relationships. I naively thought they’d start accepting my relationships when I became older. Ive broken up two wonderful long term relationships because of their opinions and need to realise now that I should count myself lucky to have met someone wonderful in my middle years :-) (we met 3 years ago)

Thank you all again for your advice and I apologise for the delay in responding. My phone broke the weekend :-(

Wishing you all the best in your wedding plans and future xxx

I would do the typical protocol and invite them to your wedding. If they really don't agree on your wedding or your relationship they simply won't show up but at least you invited them. This way the ball is in their court because you did what you had to do (inviting them) If they do show up, maybe they want to forget the past and try to make things work between all of you, including your new husband. I would give it a try either way is good for you.

I totally get what your going through. My sister has given not a yes or no to my wedding and its 16 days away. Its about managing your expectations. If you invite them and they dont come are you going to be upset? And if you invite them and they show up are you going to be upset. Write out the possiblities of each out come and in the end go with your gut. You can always try and in the end if you can step back and say you gave it your all generally speaking you will be content. Best of luck on your day. Regardless of what happens remeber its about you and your fiance ... Everything else is just decor.

I wouldn't invite them, you have your reasons and like you stated your siblings are so much younger than you and cannot begin to understand the details and all of the issues that you and your parents have gone through, why set yourself up for more disappointment ? Just so you can say you did the right thing by inviting them? They DONT support your relationship? So why invite them to a celebration that sole purpose is to publically support the relationship? Makes no sense to me. Take a stand for yourself and your relationship - respect is very important.

If you don't want them there then I don't see why you should invite them. If they clearly make no efforts then don't even stress about this. Your siblings are young so they won't fully understand but that's something you can live with. Just don't feel pressure to do anything that you really don't want. It's your big happy and and nothing should make you second guest or have regret. I'm sorry you're dealing with this and hope it all gets resolved and you can move on with the planning!

Awe this is so tough! I would do whatever you and fiancé really feel is right. You could invite them but they probably know that they weren’t originally invited because of your siblings? Either way at least they get the invite and then the ball is in their court and you don’t have to be the “bad guy”. It really is up to you though, I can totally understand why you wouldn’t want to invite them.

You could send an invite, and leave it in their court if they decide not to attend.

HOWEVER - if you don't want them there, and if you are sure in a few years you wouldn't look back and wish you had invited them, then don't.

It ultimately is supposed to be a day where you are surrounded with people who love and support you and your decisions as a couple. Try explaining to your siblings, but they should support you.

I feel your pain 💜 hang in there my mom has never liked anyone I have been with and is totally against my wedding even though we have been together 9 years!You need to do what feels right to you and forget what everyone else thinks.If they love you they will put their feelings aside and support you.I would send an invite and see what happens.

My father and I haven't spoken in over a year because of stupid drama. He was 100% in the wrong for what happened but will never take the blame for anything. Even though I already knew he would say no I still sent the invite. It felt like the right thing to do.

I would try reaching out to them before you send an invite. Either party could take offence to being sent an invite or being declined before actually trying to reconcile anything. If it were me I’d kind of lay down the details before the invite. See if they’re willing to work through it just so they can put aside their differences and be there for you on your day. I’m sorry you’re in this situation! Good luck!

Wow I’m sorry you have to go through this! I’m assuming you have talked to your siblings before and shocked they don’t understand. It’s your day and if them being there might ruin it I wouldn’t. Maybe sending an invite out might help them come to terms it’s happening either way, come support or don’t come. Even if you invite they may not show up since they haven’t talked to you in long time and wouldn’t support it.