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Sara
Devoted November 2017 Ontario

Rsvp's!

Sara, on August 24, 2017 at 14:04 Posted in Wedding ceremony 0 19

Hi everybody!

I am just wondering how everyone else was making sure people RSVP? I am having quite a time getting people to RSVP to the wedding shower and no one is RSVPing to the wedding. I am feeling a little discouraged. We are doing online RSVP's so I don't know if people are confused or what. Is anyone else having issues not getting RSVPs? What did you do about it?

TIA!

19 Comments

Latest activity by Vinod, on January 4, 2018 at 09:28
  • Vinod
    Top August 2017 Ontario
    Vinod ·
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    If you are feeling no one has responded back, send an email asking if they are aware of the rsvp date. After a week if no response, give them a phone call personally. Don't gwt down or stressed out over this matter. Its just how some people get not realizing how important it is to you.
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  • Amanda
    Frequent user September 2017 Quebec
    Amanda ·
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    I totally understand...I had set my cut off date Aug 16th and just until last week some people hadnt replied yet. I askes my MOH to as one of my so called good friends to see if they were coming because when I gave her the invite she was totally stoked...now all of a sudden she wont reply to my texts and hasnt given my MOH amd actual answer...just an I dont know if we are going. So I said F**k it...im not gonna stress out about it. I will have the people there that matter and that is it. My FH keeps saying if it was only him and I standing there alone it would still be the best day ever! 😊
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  • Kila
    Frequent user September 2018 Ontario
    Kila ·
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    I feel like a lot of people don't really understand what goes into a wedding and what it costs per person . They feel they can just show up or not show up .... ugh so frustrating
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  • Karina
    Curious October 2019 Ontario
    Karina ·
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    If they feel bothered or hounded by you needing to know then they have no idea how weddings workXD It is so frustrating because everyone knows how stressed you are and by not RSVPing they are adding to your stress levels.

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  • Carol
    Super March 2018 Ontario
    Carol ·
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    They could be waiting for an actual paper invitations.
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  • Kayla
    Devoted September 2017 Alberta
    Kayla ·
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    I made it easy and included and RSVP card, my number and email. So they could choose how to respond.Everyone but one of my good friends responded right away. I actually had to text this one friend on the cut off day to see what was up
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  • Erin
    Master September 2017 Ontario
    Erin ·
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    We sent email reminders to all our guests for RSVPs and other important details.
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  • Erin
    Expert September 2017 Ontario
    Erin ·
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    I am in the same boat! We asked for RSVPs to be returned by August 12th, and we are still waiting for several. Last night I actually texted and messaged several of our guests asking if they were coming. I didn't want them to feel like I was hounding them but we need to know numbers for the venue and catering. Several of my MIL's friends still haven't sent theirs in yet so I asked my MIL to contact them and ask, which she is doing! Honestly, I feel like we have the right to follow up with guests who haven't responded, so I wouldn't feel bad if you have to!

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  • Sara
    Devoted November 2017 Ontario
    Sara ·
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    I am feeling a little relieved that I am not alone. This wedding shower has had me in tears a few times now. Last night I found out that none of my bridal party will be making it to the wedding shower and most of my family. My FH's family will all be there and I am so thankful for that but I just wish the people closest to me would care about it too. I just have to keep telling myself it will all work out but it is really hard some days. I am definitely going to keep mentioning the wedding RSVP with people when I see them in a subtle way so that people will do it sooner than later. I guess whatever happens happens... Thank you everyone!

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  • L
    Newbie October 2017 Ontario
    Liz ·
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    I've been texting/messaging the people I'm close with, and asking through the grapevine about the others. Im probably going to let my fiancé deal with his side of the family XP Yeah I set our RSVP's a few weeks early in anticipation of people not answering on time

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  • Sonja
    VIP September 2017 Ontario
    Sonja ·
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    I called the people that didn't RSVP. Usually they got busy and forgot, or they misplaced the invitation.

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  • C
    Frequent user November 2017 Ontario
    Chris ·
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    You are not alone. My Bachlorette is tomorrow the venue we were having it at was double booked so they cancelled ours yesterday my neighbour is organizing it and trying to figure out plan b and only 3 rsvp now as the rest no longer want to come if we are only doing dinner and nobody knows what else to do . one texted me inviting me over Saturday and she was invited and said she was not even told it was my Bachlorette.
    My shower is in a few weeks it was booked months ago and nobody in the bridal party is attending. We are having jack and Jill with 100 invites and only 10 responded. They did it via evite.
    My master of ceremonies rsvp but now cannot get time off for wedding so she is not attending.
    The deadline for my wedding is 3 weeks today and only 14 have confirmed and paid in full out of 50 who paid their deposit and 100 invited.
    I am now wondering with my luck if a hurricane will come through literally.
    My naturopath told me me as long as groom is there who cares the people that want to be there will be and not to Stress. So when I have a moment or issue I keep repearind it back to myself.
    I think of all the wedding showers, baby showers 1st birthday, 50th, 40th, house warming parties we attended the past 5 years and not one is coming to our shower, Bachlorette and nobody is planning my fiancé bachelor kind of sad. Makes you rethink why you always give 110 percent and get nothing in return.
    Nobody even rsvp at all they cannot go they only rsvp is they are going. So you are not alone.
    Don't worry as long as the two most important people are there you and your partner everyone else is a bonus
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  • S
    Newbie September 2017 Ontario
    Sara ·
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    I had sent out save the dates and my finances family were confused so I made sure to make the traditional RSVPs to send to them and the older guests and his family still didn't send back the majority of them. When asked if they are coming they said maybe... so difficult to plan a wedding and meals when no one answers!!! Especially when I spent all the time making 2 separate RSVP cards and money on stamps for the return envelopes. Frustrating!!
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  • Melissa
    Devoted November 2017 Ontario
    Melissa ·
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    We just sent out our invites, and already have people replying. we needed replies for the wedding day, reception and for the breakfast the morning after. My computer genius brother in-law created a website that links to a google form for our replies. People are saying its sooo easy and it's all personalized. the website is also on our family name domain! So that's pretty neat!

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  • Sasha
    Super October 2017 Ontario
    Sasha ·
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    I totally understand. We are still missing about 15 RSVPs and the deadline is next friday. I just really don't understand because it's the easiest rsvp ever. We had an 80 year old couple RSVP online and they said it was so easy and user friendly so I'm sure no one is confused. Like if you get the invitation why not just do it right away? Lol I think I'm going to make a little Facebook post on Monday asking anyone who hasn't done it yet to kindly do so by Friday. Hopefully that will work.
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  • Tiffany
    Devoted October 2017 Ontario
    Tiffany ·
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    My RSVP deadline is tomorrow. We supplied the envelope addressed and pre-stamped. We had a lot of older people that wouldn't use the online RSVP so we did it this way. We still have 20 (40ish people) or so RSVP's to come in... by tomorrow!! [ we did send out 70 invites total]. I check the mail daily and this week we went 3 days and had nothing, we also had a lull during the middle of when we sent them out and the deadline. I understand the 'feeling discouraged' feeling. I did my deadline date a couple weeks before the venue wanted #'s so that we had time for the stragglers that came in and to make any phone calls to people that didn't send them back. I would put a gentle reminder out or if it comes up in conversation, say something along the lines that you haven't received their response.

    As for the shower - I don't understand why people can't RSVP (to anything wedding or shower related) - my mom had the same issue with getting RSVP's for mine - I had to flat out ask some people because she didn't hear and wanted to make sure she had enough food etc.

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  • B
    Super August 2017 Alberta
    Bethany ·
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    Yes I was feeling the same way for my wedding. I sent out 32 invites (+1 option) and got 10 back.. most being my wedding party, or ppl declining lol. I was getting stressed and nervous that no one was going to come. But I had exactly 50 come to my wedding, which is what I was banking on! I called ppl three times before the wedding to make sure they were actually coming.
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  • Sara
    Devoted November 2017 Ontario
    Sara ·
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    Our RSVP cut off is September 30th because the venue wants pretty accurate numbers for our details appointment on October 3rd. I'm just worried because people aren't even RSVPing to the wedding shower so it makes me feel like we will have to track people down for the wedding as well. I do have my mom putting a bug in people's ears so I will hope that can help. Thank you!

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  • Joey
    WeddingWire Admin May 2015 Maryland
    Joey ·
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    Hey Sara. When is your RSVP deadline? You're still a ways out from your wedding date, so if your RSVP deadline isn't for a while it may be that your guests just don't feel compelled to rush yet. Unfortunately until your RSVP deadline passes there isn't much you can do to hurry people along (other than maybe have a parent or family member spread the word by word of mouth). It's a pain when people miss the RSVP date and you have to call to follow up!

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