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Newbie October 2023 British Columbia

Post pandemic party

Becca, on April 28, 2021 at 18:39 Posted in Plan a wedding 0 6

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Hi Everyone,

So Adam and I were going to get married last Dec when we could still have up to 50, but then restrictions tightened. Because of our beliefs, we couldn't live together before marriage, so we quietly eloped rather than wait for an undetermined amount of time to get married. We made it as "unweddingish" as possible so we could have a ceremony with our friends and family later and it would still feel special, since my family is in a different province and country and couldn't attend. But as this pandemic drags on, I'm starting to feel selfish for wanting a wedding when we're already married. It also feels like our friends' lives have moved on, so we don't know if people would even be excited for it. Am I being super entitled by wanting to celebrate with friends and family and wear my dress? Is it worth it?

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6 Comments

Latest activity by Vinod, on May 31, 2021 at 12:05

Top August 2017 Ontario
Vinod · On May 31, 2021 at 12:05
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Your not being selfish about wanting a second wedding without the actual Officiant present as a friend or family member can take the place of the Officiant. Your guests will be very happy to celebrate your new chapter in life as they are making the time to be there in person to celebrate you two. One thing though, I wouldn't say wedding when planning the hall as the costs will go sky high. Anniversary seems to bring the cost lower and affordable.
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Newbie October 2023 British Columbia
Becca · On May 14, 2021 at 17:53
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Thank you all for your input! It's helpful to know other people are doing similar things too and that their families and friends are still excited ❤
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Featured September 2021 Ontario
Hank · On April 28, 2021 at 19:43
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I would also like to add that during pre-pandemic times (and sometimes during, ugh) people have gatherings for ANY reason all the time. So definitely no need to feel weird about it. Depending on our circumstances, we may actually end up having multiple make up receptions - our parents only like Chinese food and we couldn't have it at our wedding due to a lot of our friends having allergies to common Asian ingredients so we may have a family reception with Chinese food and a friend reception somewhere else.
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Super December 2020 Ontario
Carmel · On April 28, 2021 at 19:30
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So we were also supposed to get married in December but had to postpone because of the lockdown. We also still got married, but with a short legal ceremony in "elopement clothing" (although have already been living together for 3.5 years and through everything we just wanted to be married) and not one person questioned the fact that we were still having our "big" day only 2.5 months later! Because our original date was on NYE, we actually had some virtual parties with friends back in our hotel room post ceremony and the excitement on that marriage day did not diminish the excitement for us on our wedding day. It was PERFECT. We are in difficult and strange times - there's no rule or etiquette. You deserve that big day just like you would have without the pandemic! People are so fatigued and tired of all of this that I think having a celebration to look forward to is a wonderful thing! You'll notice the excitement for it will pick up again as you get closer to as well.
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Super November 2020 British Columbia
Christiana · On April 28, 2021 at 19:10
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I sort of feel this way, but for different reasons. I didn't want a big wedding to begin with and would have been happy eloping. But because it was really important to my husband, we planned a 100 person wedding. Plans obviously changes and our tiny covid wedding ended up being more or less what I would have wanted from the start. But my husband still definitely wants to do a reception when it's safe so that's probably what we'll end up doing. Everyone we've mentioned this to seems really happy and excited about it. We haven't had anyone question why we would have a reception even though we're already married.
I imagine it would be the same for your wedding reception. Everyone will be excited to celebrate with you and it will be a great reason for people to get together after the pandemic. If it's something you want to do then do it!
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Featured September 2021 Ontario
Hank · On April 28, 2021 at 19:07
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Not at all. That's like saying I can't have my birthday party on my actual day because life happened and my friends have all wished me Happy Birthday on Facebook. I say if it doesn't mess with your finances and you have the energy/capacity to host an event, do it.
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