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Becky
VIP September 2019 Ontario

Overload of stress -.-

Becky, on July 24, 2019 at 10:14 Posted in Plan a wedding 0 10
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I don't have overly much to do left for the wedding, but I just feel so stressed about it all! Its more so trying to pay everything left and coming out short.

We did a will recently and were told it was included with the fee's we paid when we bought our house- we ended up only having some of it covered and were expected to pay a $700 bill we weren't expecting and no clue how we are to suddenly come up with that money. I don't even have enough on credit card to put it on there. They sent us a reminder and I just am so stressed about it. There was never once mention that there would be any type of fee's.

I have reminded my fh about him needing to help with costs and he hasn't given me a penny towards the wedding. I know things are tight but I am extremely frustrated. We have less than two months to come up with 3k. Well 2k of it is for booze and the rest is other small things that add up. We were going to use my parents card and then give back the money once we sold the booze at the wedding.

I am at my max though with my credit cards due to other expenses and savings gone from paying things off. I am just stressing hard on what to do or how to make it work. My parents have already helped out sooo much, mean while his parents haven't offered once to help with a single expense. I'm not saying expect it but disappointing after how much talk they did but now nothing.


Hard core just needed a rant.

10 Comments

Latest activity by Becky, on July 26, 2019 at 09:34
  • Becky
    VIP September 2019 Ontario
    Becky ·
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    Oh no! I would have cried when receiving that bill! My parents offered to cover the difference of plate because they wanted traditional food. They gave me about 800 out of the full amount which didn't even come close to what they were supposed to pay for the difference per plate. My mom recently said if anyone says no on our side we want to invite more relatives. I told her no because we didn't get to hardly invite any friends. She then offered to pay for their plates- I said thats fine but I need the actual money before she gives invites because can't afford those extra plates

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  • Janaya
    Expert August 2019 Saskatchewan
    Janaya ·
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    We just got hit with a $1,440 bill from the venue. My mother had offered to pay for the catering and then decided she only wanted to cover 75% of it. HAHA so thank god the bank just offered me more $$ on my credit card otherwise we are so screwed.

    so I know how you feel. Chat with your FH about your stress Smiley smile

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  • Becky
    VIP September 2019 Ontario
    Becky ·
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    I am going to try the account and see how it helps- appreciate your support Vinod ! I am stubborn when comes to asking parents to borrow money, I have in the past and paid back promptly but I would like for him to be the to ask for once and have to pay it back instead of me. We are doing wedding stuff this weekend on the Sunday and going to talk more with him then.

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  • Vinod
    Featured August 2017 Ontario
    Vinod ·
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    I had the same issue with most that are saying you need help or anything you can spare to help with the financial cost of the wedding. Always had the answer to avoid to the question and never gave anything as he is bad with money as most are. Never asked again until the last 2 months he said he would pay the Officiant and for the wedding bands.

    Cost surprises of the Will is always something they catch you on and want to get paid not realizing it should have been stated or when the payment date indication on the contract.

    One thing I did to be safe and secure so that nothing was touched was setting up another account for the wedding payments as a portion from all paycheques were put in that account. It helped a lot knowing the money isn't being spent on anything else besides its purpose.

    Borrowing from your parents can help if they are letting you do so and that amount added to pay back is knowing its there to give back too in the same account as the wedding funds. They know how hard it is and helping with a solution to the expense to be paid.


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  • Becky
    VIP September 2019 Ontario
    Becky ·
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    That's a good idea and small world haha

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  • L
    Beginner September 2019 Ontario
    Linnae ·
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    I hear you! Its crazy how all the little things add up. My Fiance and I opened a joint account that we both put money in to pay for wedding items which has helped but since i'm doing majority of the planning there has been a lot of items on my credit card and not taking the amount out of the bank account which added up quickly!! You could ask him to speak to his parents to see if they are able to contribute in some way?

    Side note: We are both Grey County Ontario September brides Smiley smile


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  • Kelly
    Frequent user July 2019 Nova Scotia
    Kelly ·
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    That must be so frustrating. I hope this weekend goes well, and remember to take a breather and remember all of the things he is amazing at. I find that it helps me be more patient with his little downfallsSmiley heart

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  • Becky
    VIP September 2019 Ontario
    Becky ·
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    My fh is amazing in so many other ways but horrible with money... I have spoke to him and he always says things will be fine. This weekend going to physically show him the list of what is remaining and the balances to make a point we don't have much time and we need to pay all of this. Ask how he can help or what he can help with as can't do alone.

    I find it funny when he gets really stressed about the wedding when he hasn't paid or physically done anything yet. I just get really frustrated when he does that! It was better after we had a buck & doe and paid off pretty much majority of it. I also organized and did all the leg work/deposits.

    Hopefully physically showing him will help him realize how much is left and what we need to do,

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  • Kelly
    Frequent user July 2019 Nova Scotia
    Kelly ·
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    I feel where you're coming from. My FH is the sweetest guy alive, but he's been really hands-off with all of the planning because he's been swamped at work. Because of this, he forgets that it doesn't just fall together, and that there are things to be planned and paid for. He made fun of me a while back for being stressed, and I snapped a little bit and told him about how stressful it is to organize everything and try to pull the money for it. We came to an agreement then that if there was any issues with regards to money, I just tell him right off the bat and he'll help me figure it out.

    We are two days out now, and everything is set. Now I'm finally relaxed and he's the one stressing because he's realizing how many things have to line up, but I've taken care of all of itSmiley laugh

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  • Missa
    Frequent user August 2019 New Brunswick
    Missa ·
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    Money is so stressful. I am sorry that it's taking a toll on you. The unforeseen expense with the lawyer definitely adds to all of it. Were you able to sit with your FH and talk about the stress you're going through? Maybe look at your money together and try to see if there is anything you can cut here and there until the wedding to help you pay with the cost?


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