Our own supper?

Given what i think will for you is there.

Your meal with your husband and wedding party seems unfair to others and your own family.

I like Tori's idea of having your guests eating out on their own time since they will be hungry.

If you feel to share the restaurant your all eating at and family also want to go there, let them on their own time.

View quoted message That's a great idea!

Okay.... let's get to your question rather than suggesting ways for you to afford a sit down meal or buffet....

IMO, I think that it would be more than alright to have a finger food reception but yes, try and set it for maybe 7? If you do want to have it at an earlier time like 5:30-6:30 then make sure you make it clear on the invitations and your website that there won't be a meal but tons of finger foods to go around.

Once that is made clear you could even put on your website which restaurant you will be going to (make sure you have your own reservation), so that if people want to eat there they can and it won't be so hush hush and look like you are trying to hide something.

Of course - this is all just my opinion

Have you gotten separate quotes and looked around? We were able to do a buffet style for 17$/plate including dessert.. we paid 1700$ which may seem pricey but not compared to 50$+ /plate. Wish you luck!

I had the same problem here. I wanted to invite so many people but couldn’t afford to pay for everyone and FH didn’t want to charge our guests. I thought I could do an intimate wedding ceremony and dinner and then invite all my guests for the party, but a lot of them wanted to see the ceremony. My bridesmaid suggested to have a later ceremony (around 7 pm so they know dinner won’t be served) and have a small dinner before it happens with only our wedding party and close family. Not sure what i’m going to do yet but I think it’s a good compromise!

Also remember if you don’t do a meal you will still need to feed you and your fh and your bridal party. If you are going to a restaurant that will be a few hundred dollars as well. Please don’t ask your bridal party to buy their own dinner.

View quoted message I would actually talk to your venue and cost it out properly. Also venues may do things like charge you a room rental fee if you are just doing a few finger foods, but not if you are having dinner. Also like I said before you do need to provide a significant amount of finger foods if you are going that route. Probably more then you realize.

You could cut costs other ways like not having an open bar. Maybe serve a meal but only provide wine? Your alcohol costs will be significant with a cocktail reception. Or reduce the guest list maybe?

I think its really best to just have an evening ceremony if your not doing a meal. That way people aren’t expecting a meal.

That's true about finger food costing the same as buffet service. Your not breaking the bank going that option.

It would seem odd tp disappear and come back. Why not arrange for room meals tp your room and put the sign on the door "DO NOT DISTURB". This way you all get to enjoy a nice meal.

We estimated if we did a full supper it would be 2800 but just finger foods would be 1300. It would be pizzas fruits veggies cheese etc.

I am not sure if you looked into it but our meal was much cheaper then I actually expected. When we looked at the individual prices it was shocking but adding it up I realized it wasn't as bad it looked. The price of finger foods added up very quickly, it was like $10-30 a dozen and each guest would probably have at least 5 probably more if there were no dinner option. We decided to have only half our guests have dinner (our closest family and friends) the other half will be invited to the ceremony and dance.

If you're having finger foods, I would suggest a later ceremony so the reception isn't over dinner time. Your guests won't complain if they have already eaten and know ahead of time it will be an appetizer reception.

Yeah, I would prob go off site to have dinner if you want more privacy or not to upset anyone from not being included.

If you insist on having an earlier wedding and not serving dinner to all guests, I would go someplace else for dinner. Since you are having your reception there it is very possible some guests will decide to have dinner there before the reception. That would be very awkward to have you and your bridal party sitting eating dinner, while other wedding guests are sitting there kind of excluded.

Have you priced out a cocktail reception? We initially thought of doing this in a way to cut costs. We soon discovered that those finger foods add up quickly and it would cost us about the same to actually serve a meal. You have to provide a decent amount of food, even if it’s all finger food. Especially if people will be drinking.

Yes I’m sure there will be people who would be upset to see that some people get dinner while others don’t. But you have to decide if that bothers you or not.

Like I said I would compare the actuall price of the two options. If you still want to have a cocktail reception I would suggest having an evening ceremony that takes place after dinner.