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Miranda
Curious May 2020 Alberta

MOH mistake?

Miranda, on January 24, 2020 at 14:50 Posted in Plan a wedding 0 12
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Hi ladies, I am unsure of what I should do and am hoping you can offer some advise..
Back in college (about 20 years ago) is when I met what I consider to be one of my best friends . After college I moved to Alberta and as it does, life happened and we kind of lost contact. We would reach out and talk every couple years or so but when we did it was like we never stopped talking, just picked up right where we left off.
Fast forward to this year when out of the blue she Facebook messaged me and in talking said if possible (by that she meant if I was only having a small wedding she understood if she couldn't come) she would love to attend my wedding. We kept talking for the following month and it just felt right to ask her to be my maid of honour. She sounded genuinely happy that I asked and prior to that she was asking of there was any way she could help with planning. We have been talking fairly regularly now and I am so happy to have her in my life again! My question is, do you think I put too much on a long distance friend? sorry for the long winded post lol

12 Comments

Latest activity by Tracy, on February 4, 2020 at 11:56
  • Tracy
    Frequent user August 2021 Ontario
    Tracy ·
    • Dispute

    Only she can tell you if she is feeling under pressure. Have a video chat which will help you see her facial expressions when you're talking about it. Perhaps she is better doing on line help and come the week of the wedding arrive earlier to help with the last minute details which will help take pressure off of you.

    • Reply
  • Kimmy
    Newbie August 2021 Alberta
    Kimmy ·
    • Dispute

    I live in Alberta. My MOH lives in Ontario. We've been BFF's since we were 4! She's been in Ontario for 24yrs now and we are still an important part in each others lives. So YES long distance can for sure work Smiley winking If you feel it's right, then go with it Smiley winking

    • Reply
  • Ashley
    VIP August 2020 Ontario
    Ashley ·
    • Dispute

    I just find it hard to maintain long distance friendships. if you see yourself keeping up with the current interaction then make her MOH but i feel like youll end up fading again and make new friends. once people start having kids and buying houses its so hard to maintain these LD friendships thats my view.

    • Reply
  • Miranda
    Curious May 2020 Alberta
    Miranda ·
    • Dispute
    Thank you all for your very valuable input!! I feel much better and plan on having a phone coffee date with her tomorrow to do some planning. 😊
    • Reply
  • Rayanne
    Featured June 2022 Ontario
    Rayanne ·
    • Dispute
    There are friendships where time and distance do not matter. I doubt she took the role lightly and if she is excited and you are happy with the arrangement I think it'll work just fine.
    • Reply
  • Ashley
    Beginner November 2022 Manitoba
    Ashley ·
    • Dispute
    I think that’s fabulous true love and friendship. If I may, I think you should let her know how you feel, and if she truly wants to lend a hand, let her help you take even one thing off your plate 💙 I hope you and your partner have a fabulous wedding day!
    • Reply
  • Vinod
    Featured August 2017 Ontario
    Vinod ·
    • Dispute

    You can make it work long distance wise to keep your MOH updated with what is to be done and dress shopping. Any details discussed will be the same with the bridesmaids too. Given your MOH will be having more responsibilities on her. Email, text and facetime whenever needed with a dates of events taking place and time to come down.

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  • Lynne
    Curious June 2022 Quebec
    Lynne ·
    • Dispute
    I live in Montreal and all my bridal party is in New Brunswick so yes it can definitely work. As long as you stay in touch with them it's all good. Smiley smile
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  • Geneviève
    VIP September 2020 Ontario
    Geneviève ·
    • Dispute
    You can definitely do it for sure! I’m in Nova Scotia and my MOH is in Ontario where the wedding will be. It’s been tough sometimes, but if your friendship is that strong, you can definitely make it happen! Maybe just pick the top things for her to attend so she can budget her travel
    • Reply
  • Madisyn
    Expert February 2020 Ontario
    Madisyn ·
    • Dispute
    You can definitely make it work! My one MOH lives 8 hours away, the other 4 hours away, and my bridesmaid is on the other side of the country! We are all in a group chat and keep the communication open as needed. They've helped with decision making and planning, it's just involved a lot of phone calls, pictures and video chats. 😊
    • Reply
  • Amelia
    Master October 2020 New Brunswick
    Amelia ·
    • Dispute
    I agree with Tori, as long as both of you are ok with the distance and the limits that might cause then it should be fine.


    I think it's lovely that the two of you have managed to stay in touch!
    • Reply
  • Tori
    Top October 2019 Manitoba
    Tori ·
    • Dispute

    I think that as long as you and her are both aware that there is a distance and that she may not be able to physically be there by your side - then there isn't a problem with it at all! Don't forget to mention to her that you understand there is distance and she may not be able to "be there" for you, but she will still be there for you.

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