Maid of honour...?

I would reach out to her, maybe even plan on getting together. I find true friends never truly drift too far, people get busy but I am sure you will feel better if you talk to her.

The comments below make great points! But honestly I would reach out to her! If it seems out of person for her to not even be excited for you maybe something is wrong? Has she had a recent break up and the mention of an engagement is just not what she wants to hear right now?

Drifting happens and a lot can change with a person when you aren't up to date as much! I think this is a great time for you to get together with her one on one! See what's going on and make the decision then to ask her!

Okay, here's my take: I will only have a 13 month engagement, and I was actively best friends with my MOH at the time of my engagement (she woke up the entire house SCREAMING when she found out I was engaged)... and now we barely talk and she's no longer in the bridal party.

Things can change in the next 2 years, don't lock down your bridal party at all yet... I would seriously say wait until a year out. Life changes, people change... and that could be good! Maybe not forcing it with this friend, you'll drift back together, or really drift apart and then it's probably for the best you hadn't brought up being MOH yet...

Also with the the other girls said, my FH and I had about 6 people each to call before posting on social media, and she was one of them (hence the early morning screaming)... She could definitely be hurt she found out like everyone else. However, a true friend still would have reached out... so just be wary that unless she accepts an apology right away and moves on, she's being selfish, and that can translate into bigger issues down the road when planning a wedding.

Hopefully it all works out, and you guys can reconnect and make it work!

I think that her helping with your wedding would be a great way to reconnect with her. Ask her to be MOH, and if she accepts I am sure she will be very flattered and excited for you. Explain to her that you cannot imagine your day without her, even though the two of you have drifted.

I agree with everyone else and reach out to her!

I was in the states when I got engaged and posted my engagement on Facebook. I immediately messaged my best friend to tell her too. Usually I would've waited until I saw her next, but it would've been over a week and I was too excited about it lol.

This was October 2017. I didn't ask my wedding party until the start of 2018. I would talk to your friend and get a feel of where your relationship is at. It could simply be a misunderstanding!

I agree with what the others have said. we had a list of people we had to call/tell via phone or photo before we put on social media. I would have been upset if my BF didn't call me and tell me she was engaged.

talk it out with her. i'm sure it will be all fine.

and I see you aren't getting married till 2020. you have time to decide on a wedding party. don't jump make the decision right away (it took my 3-4 months to decide on one outside of 2 friends). so I waited to even officially ask them.

Well it looks like you've got this all figured out! lol Hope everything goes over well! To be quite honest I felt the same way with my Bestie but I just put her as a bridesmaid and had my sister step into the MOH role instead. In my case I had a sister so I knew it was the right choice because blood is thicker right? (For the most part.)

As the other girls said, welcome to the wedding wire community and congratulations on your recent engagement!!!

Congratulations on your engagement, Detra!

I agree with Dar. Personally, I think she may be bothered by the fact that you didn't tell her the news before you posted your engagement announcement on Facebook. While I'm not faulting you, I can see where she's coming from; as Dar said, it may have made her question where your friendship stands, even if it wasn't your intention to make her do so.

I suggest reaching out to her. Ask her how she's doing before transitioning into talking about your engagement. Hearing from you may make her feel better. I imagine she'll feel valued and explain why she didn't contact you first. I know she shouldn't feel like this as it's your big news and she should understand that it's yours to share how you wish to, but I'm sure if this is the case, she'll come around quickly after realizing your decision wasn't meant to be a slight toward her! (Realistically she should've known that form the start, but emotions can get in the way of logic sometimes!)

Neither of you did anything wrong; if she's truly your friend, you two will reconcile.