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Genna
Curious July 2022 British Columbia

Lodging for guests... We pay or they pay?

Genna, on January 26, 2020 at 13:39 Posted in Plan a wedding 0 7
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We are having a very small or 5 key wedding of max 35 people. We live in Calgary but don't want to get married here. It's either going to be in the mountains or west coast. Most of our family lives here. My MOH lives in Saskatchewan and that's 5 and 1/2 hour drive. The best man and groomsmen live in the states and will have to fly up. They will be staying with us along with my maid of honour until the wedding however if we do our wedding in the mountains are on the west coast that will be anywhere between 2 to 18 hours away from here. I'm wondering is it supposed to be our responsibility to pay for lodging for our wedding party and also who pays for lodging for the guests?

7 Comments

Latest activity by Tracy, on February 4, 2020 at 12:02
  • Tracy
    Frequent user August 2021 Ontario
    Tracy ·
    • Dispute

    You are spending enough on your wedding for them to attend. They will rsvp, if you are too far for them, they will say no. But I'm sure they don't care the distance, it's to be with you celebrating your day. If you feel the need to help out, if the resort was willing to give you a discount, ask them to spread the discount/upgrade you & your partner would have received to discount the hotel rates. Do your research first. We are out of town so I've given my guests a few options and I have included the distance to the wedding so they know how far it will be. Including a local KOA and B&B's.

    Other options are renting a bus and everyone going to reception together. You can also offer to pay for your parents room and maybe maid of honour and best man to help them out, however, they will probably say no.


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  • Ashley
    VIP August 2020 Ontario
    Ashley ·
    • Dispute

    I dont think you should be paying for other peoples lodging that will get super expensive. but you can do a hotel block for people so they can get a discount or suggest an air bnb for people

    • Reply
  • Tori
    Top October 2019 Manitoba
    Tori ·
    • Dispute

    Lodging is paid by your wedding party unless you are giving this as their gift for being in the wedding party - but the guests are all to pay for themselves. Just think of it like a destination wedding, you wouldn't pay for them to go to Mexico, it just means that less people may be able to make/afford the trip out to attend. Best you can do it possibly book a hotel block to try and get everybody at the same place as well as maybe a cheaper price if you get enough people to book there.

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  • Vinod
    Featured August 2017 Ontario
    Vinod ·
    • Dispute
    You do have the choice to pay for the wedding party lodging as a gift or let them pay themselves. We didn't pay for our wedding party since they shared rooms with others. You gift paid for the hair and make up is enough for the bridal party as the gifts given to the groomsmen.
    Consider the options of gift given and expenses spent that isn't needed on you.
    • Reply
  • Marcy
    Frequent user October 2020 Saskatchewan
    Marcy ·
    • Dispute

    I agree with what others have said - It shouldn't be your responsibility to pay for their lodging. Honestly, that's kind of part of the expectation when you agree to be in someone's bridal party. There are always ways for people to find more affordable options. Depending on the time of year, and where you're wedding is being held they could camp, air bnb, etc. I've been in quite a few weddings as a bridesmaid and a couple as a maid of honour and have always looked after my own lodging. As for guests, id say it's definately up to them to pay for their own accommodations. You can book room blocks at most hotels, which gives guests a special discounted wedding rate to help them out.

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  • Kadi
    Curious August 2021 Alberta
    Kadi ·
    • Dispute
    My wedding venue offers rv and tent sites for guest witch coast extra. So they have to pay for that if they decide to do it. I do not think it is your responsibility to pay for their accomdations while they are visiting for your special night. That will coast you WAY to much. Its no dofferant then a destination wedding at a resort where you guest have to pay for the airfare and pay for the hotel. Just my two cents
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  • Amelia
    Master October 2020 New Brunswick
    Amelia ·
    • Dispute
    I don't think it's your responsibility, you can certainly help find accomodations for your wedding party. If you find an air b&b that would fit everyone you could offer to pay it or even chip in for most of it as a gift to your wedding party.
    They agreed to be in your wedding so as long as you're open about the potential costs you're fine. That being said if someone can't afford it you either need to accept that they won't be there or offer to pay if you're able.

    The guests are responsible for their own accomodations. You can help find rooms or reserve a block of rooms (which usually gives guests a discount) but you do not need to pay for them.
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