Is it just me?? or

View quoted message You handled that so well!! Good thinking on the rehearsal dinner ☺️

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That's scary my own mom even said about wearing an off white - cream dress and I said no your not. After awhile you just know what to say and to whom, I am happy everything worked out for you

View quoted message So she isn’t wearing the dress? Thank goodness

I'm not saying it's funny because personality it's not a close friend of mine said I found a dress to wear too your wedding, oh great she said it was off white. I too had a bird. I said well my dress is Ivory don't think you should get or wear that dress, why well because I explained it too her. ohh okay, and thinking if anyone wears anything close to my color I don't think I could ever forget that, or them

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I'm glad everything worked out for you Amie! I would mind too if a parent showed up wearing something very white since they are in a bunch of photos. If it were any other guest, I wouldn't care as much, but it I'd still be thinking: "why did you think that was a good idea?!"

View quoted message Well I did mention it. She showed me the dress is person and I said I preferred this other coloured dress she showed me also. She asked if it’s bexause the dress is “lighter in colour”? I was a bit squeamish but told yes, it is. It was a bit of an awkward moment - maybe just for me. I then suggested maybe she were it the bridal shower or rehearsal. She thought the rehearsal would be an appropriate time to wear the white dress.

So that’s good! I’m reliefed she won’t be wearing a white dress to the wedding. It’s selfish of me, I know but like some of you mentioned, she will in a lot of photos.

It's a pretty dress but it is quite white to wear to a wedding. Just be honest with her, I'm sure she felt that way at her wedding! My mom was also looking at white dresses but I mentioned it to her and she immediately understood and bought a navy blue dress.

I'd definitely talk to her! I'd be really unimpressed with my FMIL if she wore that dress since it is common knowledge that it is a faux pas to wear a mostly white dress to a wedding (if you're not the bride).

I would feel same as you! She will be in a lot of photo's as shes one of the parents, I would do a similar convo as what Montanna mentioned

View quoted message That’s such sound advice - thank you. It’s not a huge deal and I was maybe being a bit of a bridezilla getting upset about something so small. She can wear what she wants. 🙂

View quoted message Thanks for sharing your experience. I’ve decided I’ll not say anything. She’s a wonderful woman and in the end, it’s not the end of the worls

I'd let it go. Personally, I wouldn't wear white to someone else's wedding because I know a lot of brides don't like it, but I really don't care if someone else wears white to my wedding. It just doesn't seem like worrying about it is a good use of my mental energy. It's not like people will get confused about who the bride is!

One trick that I use when I'm getting overwhelmed is to ask myself what would happen if I did nothing. This is a great example of a situation where doing nothing would have no averse effects, so move on!

It’s certainly not just you! My dad’s mom, my nan, bought a white dress very similar to that one but with a few red flowers on it. I asked my mom to talk to her for me but she wouldn’t. So I called her and was able to slip into the conversation that I really hope I'm the only one wearing white! She said “ahhhh it’s not a big deal, there’s no rule against it” and I said, “even if there isn’t a rule, it’s something that means a lot to me. I love the dress that you choose, but maybe you could wear it to rehearsal dinner! But for my wedding day it would mean the whole world to me if you had a coloured dress. Please just think about it.” She has since returned her dress in exchange for a bright grey one! It’s a hard conversation to have, my fiancé doesn’t see the big deal either, but it’s your wedding day and at the end of the day when it’s all said and done you just need to be happy!! Just explain to her your thoughts and maybe just let them sit with her for a while without straight out telling her to find another dress. She might make the decision on her own

I totally get how you feel, it's actually one of my biggest fears is that someone will wear white or someone will try and make the attention on them.
That dress isnt too bad. If it really is bothering you I'm sure you can just talk to her and she will understand. Everything with work out.

I understand your frustrations with someone else wearing white, I am worried about that myself. I have an aunt who believes its perfectly okay to wear white to a wedding when you aren't the bride. It makes me crazy, and worried she will show up in white. She took my mom dress shopping and was trying to convince her to wear white. My mother put up a fight, but ended up buying a white dress with blue flowers. She also has a hard time sticking to her guns. After seeing it though, I decided that I don't want to get upset about it. Because of the flowers, it doesn't look like a wedding dress so I'm letting it go. (I also am wearing Ivory, not white so that might be why I had an easy time letting it go).

If it bugs you that much though, sit down and nicely address this with your future mother in law. Hopefully she will be understanding. Just let her know that you do want to be the only one in white. It's not an unreasonable request. It's your day, and you hopefully will only get this day once.

Thanks everyone!

Maybe it's the picture but it looks grey to me with white and black accents. I can see why you'd be upset about her wearing white though... but I dont think it will take away from you as the bride at all. It is your day though and if you dont want her to wear it I'd let her know sooner than later so she can find something else

View quoted message You are very welcome! Trust me I’m the same way. It makes it difficult when it’s your in laws and not your parents!

View quoted message You’re right. I struggle being direct. I’m afraid to ruffle any feathers or shake the boat. Thanks Casey. ❤️

View quoted message Hmmm. Then I would let her know that it’s very white to be wearing to the wedding and you wanted to be the only one in white. Something along those lines.

View quoted message Thank you! What a great idea. If she says she was planning on wearing it to the wedding?

I am sorry someone showed up to your wedding in that. I don’t understand how your guest didn’t know. Personally, I stay as far away from white as I can.

thanks for your input though!

It is a beautiful dress. I would have the same issue telling my mother in law that I didn’t want her wearing a dress she already bought! Although it does have black accents it is still mainly white.


Maybe you can suggest she wear it to your shower if you are having one?

We had a plus 1 show up in a white lace dress, and I didn’t even notice until someone pointed it out. My friends and my sister were livid for me. In all honesty, nothing will take away from you and she will probably get quite a bit of snarky side-eye, but I don’t think it is a hill to die on