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Maya
Expert January 2019 Alberta

Invitation wording help

Maya, on July 5, 2018 at 18:33 Posted in Plan a wedding 0 14
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So just a few things for our wedding invitations that I need help wording. My cousin got married last year August and one of my uncles brought our other cousin who wasn’t invited as his plus one. This cousin causes drama and drinks too much, I was planning to address his invite to him and my aunt. Is there another way to tell guests they can’t substitue someone for their significant other.

Also we are planning to get married around 1-2 so that we have enough time for photos. Some family and friends are from out of town and my mom thinks they will do shopping when we go for photos. I was thinking to have hors d’oeuvres at 3:30-4:30 and have dinner start between 5:30-6:00. We also have the option to get a horse drawn wagon for an $245/ hour for guest to tour around the park as it will be off season. Should I ask how many would be interested in that or just do it?

We are also planning on emailing out the invitations and only getting a few for keepsakes for immediate family and grandparents. I would appreciate any other wording suggestions for unplugged and no kids.

14 Comments

Latest activity by Maya, on July 6, 2018 at 14:51
  • Maya
    Expert January 2019 Alberta
    Maya ·
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    Thanks, it’s not the only family drama I’m dealing with. Lol my Fiancé’s sister wanted to be in the wedding party and is going to be a groomsmaid and we are having issues getting her dress. We agreed on one and then she was like I’m going to look at more. Just makes me wish I hadn’t caved to let her in the wedding party.
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  • Brittany
    British Columbia
    Brittany ·
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    Yikes. See, I may not be as composed about this... If he RSVPd for your aunt, and your cousin showed up instead... I'd tell her straight up, you're not on the seating chart.... but I can be mean when people try and pull one over on me.

    If both of them (aunt and cousin), showed up, then you can really say, there's no seat for you. Go home. Haha. Just kidding... sort of...

    If he RSVPs with Uncle & Aunt... maybe even contact them and reaffirm that it's the 2 of them coming?

    Sorry, I know family drama sucks. Hopefully it works out.. or maybe you could have a 3rd party family member casually mention something? Good luck!

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  • Maya
    Expert January 2019 Alberta
    Maya ·
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    I do not think he would say cousin x was substituted until the day of and she would just show up. She brought her bf to my last cousins wedding which she wasn’t invited to.
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  • Brittany
    British Columbia
    Brittany ·
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    You could, if you received an RSVP with her name substituted, (even after very specifically listing your aunt and uncle) contact your uncle and say "we have some guests we are waiting to invite if we receive declined RSVPs, if Aunt X can't come, we already have someone for her seat. If we have more space at the end, Cousin X can come instead" --- And then just say there was never space... haha.

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  • Maya
    Expert January 2019 Alberta
    Maya ·
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    What do you plan on doing if someone does substitute someone even if they RSVPd for their significant other. For me with that one cousin I have certain reasons for not wanting her there, because of how she drinks and causes drama. I just don’t know how I would say I don’t want you here nicely without causing a scene.
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  • Stephanie
    VIP May 2019 Ontario
    Stephanie ·
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    This is exactly how we are doing it!

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  • Vinod
    Top August 2017 Ontario
    Vinod ·
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    A note on the invitation may help.

    Kindly note that no substitutes will be allowed on place of significant other and 19+ only event.
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  • Maya
    Expert January 2019 Alberta
    Maya ·
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    We aren’t sending plus ones to people we haven’t met their significant other. It may be an unpopular opinion but I can’t afford to increase the guest list by 50-60 people. We already have 165 guests and at 70 dollars a plate having any extra will not be affordable.

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  • Maya
    Expert January 2019 Alberta
    Maya ·
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    I want to find a nice way to say no substitutes, because I know I will have people that think they can bring someone instead of the significant other that is listed.
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  • Holly
    VIP June 2019 Ontario
    Holly ·
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    For those guests that have significant others that we know we will address it to them also on the RSVP it will say
    "RSVP for (name & name)
    Two seats are reserved for you"
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  • Vinod
    Top August 2017 Ontario
    Vinod ·
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    The phrase is used a lot out there now adays, we have reserved ___ seatd for names of guests. RSVP can follow to let them know whom is to verify. They wouls have to email or call you personally to bring someone else and you can say no.
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  • Sarah
    Frequent user July 2020 Nova Scotia
    Sarah ·
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    Maybe you could send a reminder and tell them that important information is on the website? Depending on how many guests you have it might be hard to call all of them and ask!
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  • Maya
    Expert January 2019 Alberta
    Maya ·
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    I would love to add a pole on the wedding website, but none of our guests are using it and I sent it to all of them for the save the date already.
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  • Sarah
    Frequent user July 2020 Nova Scotia
    Sarah ·
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    We are doing rsvp on our website, that way only the people on the invitation can rsvp because only their names will be there. And you can also add to your blog about who is addressed on the envelop is who is invited, and that there is no + one substitution, or children invited to the wedding. And as for unplugged ceremony, you can add that to your itinerary for the day, or have a collection basket for all electronics to hold back the urge to take photos. Just simply explain each in your own way, I don’t think there is any specific way.
    You can also add poles to wedding websites if you’re doing one, and then you can see who would be for a horse drawn carriage tour, (I quite like that idea!)
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