I might elope

Thank for your input everyone! We've decided to keep it simple and have an intimate and casual wedding! I think the only reason we were considering Glendale was to invite those to satisfy when I would not be satisfied with out bill on that one! So everyone not invited to our ceremony will get a nice elopement card!

When I was younger I always thought that I would do the destination wedding thing...shell out for the honeymoon, tell everyone where I was going and invite them to come and whoever shows up great and if not that is great too!

Now that I am actually older and getting married my priorities have shifted and I have to consider the FH's priorities as well. I really want to have a big party with family. I prioritized what was really important to me, beautiful ceremony location, good food, photography and a beautiful dress. This is where I spent money like a crazy woman (not as crazy as I could have been - some of the quotes for photography were over $12,000 - um no thank you I will stay under $5K so a little crazy) and I have cut back in other areas. Real flowers are also really important to me so I am spending a little more there than if I did silks myself with the help of my MOH. I did decide that a planner was outside my budget but I had considered it initially.

It seems like getting married is a lot like being married it is all about deciding what is important and compromising on the rest...I am being all philosophical today.

Also lightsabre duels are awesome!!

I've honestly had these thoughts too, and whenever I did I would ask myself "Will you look back and regret not having a traditional wedding and all the experiences that go with it?" A part of me was like heck no, as long as at the end of the day I'm married to my Fiance, it doesn't matter. But then I'd see pictures of a pretty wedding or a beautiful cake and think, OK maybe I would regret not having those experiences. As stressfull and expensive a wedding might be, I've honestly had SO much fun planning it with my Fiance. We had a BLAST searching for venues and made a whole day date out of it. I can't wait for things like menu selection and cake testing

But it's ultimately your decision! A wedding's about you and your fiance, so whatever makes you guys happy is what you should do.

Think outside the box! I thought of eloping, but I do want some sort of wedding with nice photos and some friends and family... so instead of traditional we picked something we, and our family all enjoy doing... We rented some log cabins (all 6 on the property) and are having the ceremony on the dock followed by a BBQ, lawn games and a bonfire... simple, cheap, no sit down meal to pay for etc.

I think it depends most on what you and your fiance want to do. Everything you mentioned can be changed to be less expensive (if that is the goal). You don't need certain things just because it's expected. Unless you really want a 3 course meal at Glendale personally, you can find less expensive venues and have a buffet (or family style). Glendale is lovely, but it's pricey!

I am a very stingy person and I start to sweat anytime I have to spend money. A small, intimate wedding sounds ideal to me. However, I really wanted to have a bigger wedding (100 people) because my family does not get together often and that was more important to me personally.

Keep us posted on what you decide

I wanted a ferry small affair, with close family only, but that's not going to fly for him and his family. If you're comfortable with it, and your spouse is, do your own thing. I think part of it is people do give $$ that offsets the cost of the wedding after the fact, but yeah, it's all pretty burdensome. I don't know if people don't realize or they don't care, but they do seem to expect the whole big party. We're trying to keep things like attire and flowers to a minimum, since food and drinks tend to be what people remember most. The best advice I saw about this was having you and your spouse right down the top 3 things that matter to you in a wedding, and then discussing how those work. Also, no one said it has to be your wedddimg for you to have a lightsaber battle! Just enjoy it all. It'll only happen once.

Elope! But i still think you should have a light sabre duel cuz thats just awesome. Your wedding should be about you and it sounds like what you have planned if you elope would be more about the two of you than putting on a party for the guests which is awesome in my opinion. AND if it would allow you to save a couple bucks and extend your honeymoon thats a bonus too

I would elope if he would... He wants the large family wedding... I intend to have a good time but would prefer to save that cash... If you can get your fiancee on board I say elope.