how much should we spend?

True!

I think you should ask them what they would be ready to pitch in for.

Yea that definitely helps x

My parents are helping with dress and venues and his are paying for dj and catering, which helps a loooot!!!!! we pay the rest ourselves.

Maybe this can help? https://www.weddingwire.ca/wedding-ideas/your-wedding-budget-breakdown--c22

Or have a look at the vendors to have a better idea of how much they would cost?

My parents want to help and my bf's parents too, but im not what they should be paying for?

I agree, it really depends on many things.... like your savings or if your parents and family will be paying for venues, dress, etc. We figured we didn't want anything too extravangant, since we're also saving for a house. Hope this helps!

Depends how many people you want to invite. My fiance and I are paying for most of the wedding ourselves. We're trying to stay under $6k. His family is not helping with the costs since their from out of town and will cost them a lot of money to come to our wedding. And my family offered to do the catering and make most of the accessories ourselves, so it helps us a lot to reduce the costs. It's a lot of planning but everyone contributes in their own way which is fine for us. It helps us lower our budget and makes everyone be part of the wedding. I'm also going to rent my dress and shoes.