How do i choose my Moh?

Your dilemma seems to have great pros and cons for each person to know what they can handle and can't. You have the choice to make based on who will be the best person to stand and help in what you need with suggestions to make upon your options. It can be hard though you will know that family is there for you and not necessarily part of the wedding party.

I know in our Indian culture, we choose family to help where ever we can with anything to offer of having in our homes for weddings. We didn't choose to have family part of our wedding party except for the kids as flower kids from my side for the procession and then seated with their parents. We had friends we knew extremely well and to know they are there for us anytime. One BM (Best Man) didn't make a speech though I did forget about my BM to make the speech when asked I had anyone else.

Honestly, you gotta do what the best fit is for you. If someone you don't choose get's a little pissy about it then it probably worked out in your favour that they aren't you MOH because they're forgetting this is about you, not them.

That said!! I was in the bridal party for one of my besties, and she basically didn't have a "MOH" in those terms. She lived in MB as did the other girl so admittedly it just made sense that a lot of things I wasn't there for. That said, no one held the title of MOH and we all took part in planning things out for the bride etc.

Realistically, in this day and age you don't NEED to have someone with the official title of MOH. If that's something that's causing you some anxiety, nix the title and just ask people to be a bridesmaid. If one of them is more comfortable than the other of making a speech, then perfect!

Not sure how helpful this was but hopefully it gave you another way to look at things

Do you think your sister would be pissed if you chose anyone else? If not, then go with #3

I'm close with my sister, so it was an obvious choice for me. But if I didn't have her, then I would defs go with the closest girl friend I have at the moment and you know will do a good job of being MOH.

Sounds like #3 is the best option. I went through the same thing as you when deciding. I have a sister who is 7 years younger than me, still in college, shy and not really the organized type of person to be able to help me with all things wedding and because she is so much younger she really does not know much. Whereas my best friend of 16 years is a hair stylist, done numerous weddings and also much more organized where I know she would be able to take the burden of things if I needed any help.

Go with your gut on who will help you with the experience best other than those you have known for longer and/or are blood relatives.

Hey Anya! I would say if you are having a hard time just picking one, would it be a little easier to potentially pick 2 maid of honors? This could allow the both of them to help each other out and you, for example when the other is busy. Plus they might be able to compliment the other - where one MOH might not be able to do a speech, your other MOH might be able to pull it off without a hitch (just an example). I hope this makes sense and helps you out!

It seems to me like you think of #3 as your MOH. I am super to close to one of my sisters but not the other one. Neither are in my wedding party. We decided to have just one person on each side. Luckily for me it was an easy choice. That being said I'm not having a bridal shower or stag and doe or any of the prewedding parties. Our wedding party is there just to sign the licence. I'm not making my MOH buy a dress (since I only have one) I literally went in her closet and picked one of her dresses even changed up the wedding colours a bit to accommodate her. The FH's BM will maybe need a tie if he doesn't have the correct colour. Your wedding party is whoever you feel is the best for the job.

Sounds like you'd like #3. Do it! It's your day! I wouldn't be choosing based on who can speak though... That shouldn't matter. No one should be forced to speak. If it helps, my two sisters are much older than me, also with two kids each, and I chose my best friend (who lives five hours away) because we have been best friends since we were 3. I told my sister's in advance because my mom wasn't happy and they were not surprised at all. They said it totally makes sense.

I'd go with #3. I'd explain to my sister that I chose someone else because I didn't want her to have to worry about all the additional MOH duties or subject her to a speech when you know she wouldn't enjoy doing a speech. 5 years is a long time to loose touch with someone. I'd explain to #2 that she is still a really close friend of yours and it was such a difficult choice to make!