Help! His sister wants to bring a friend

If you feel uncomfortable with it, perhaps have a chat with her and just tell her you’d really prefer to know everyone who is attending.. since it is a small and personal wedding that should help drive your point across. I find it helps to point out that, for you, on your big day you are inviting those who you will still see 15+ years down the line, people that you can actually share these memories with.

I’d honestly just let it happen. There’s been several things that come up in regards to wedding planning where I’d rather just let him win if it’s not that big a deal.

I would do my very best to turn that down, especially being a very intimate group. If your wedding was larger with a 110+ guests then I would say let it go. But for "Family Only", I would put your foot down! After all it's your day and you are paying and I would kindly say due to the "limited" space available at the venue you cannot accommodate more than what you have booked for.

Personally i wouldn't want some stranger at my wedding, i would say to put your foot down!

My reaction to this would depend heavily on my relationship with her. For example, does she do this type of thing often (try to bend the rules or change things to her advantage even when everyone else is following along with the rules/status quo?) If it is a pattern for her to push boundaries, I would make it a point to put my foot down and say no - establishing boundaries that aren't easily broken is important with people who like to take a mile every time you give an inch. If it's a one-time thing, I would discuss with your fiance and decide from there. Maybe the compromise is that she HAS to give you the name of her guest and has to stick to that so you have your final guest list and it's not just open to whoever she happens to feel like bringing at the last minute.

She definitely knows ALL the details, including how small it is, how it's just a ceremony and luncheon, and how our friends and cousins haven't even been invited. I'm annoyed, but figure it isn't worth fighting over so I'll let it go. Thanks for your input, it helps me "let it go".

I would ultimately leave it up to your FH to decide. Voice your concerns, which I think are all valid, however, if he decides to allow her a plus one, just go with it.

That one person there won't ruin your lovely day!

Weddings can be hard for some people. Weddings are all about love and relationships and if you're not in that place in your life, they make you want it even more. I think you should just let her bring someone, especially since her immediate family will all have a guest there (her children, parents, her brother and you). I don't think it's worth it to argue over. Just give her a date that she needs to let you know by either way so that you can let the caterer know to provide another plate of food. If she invites this friend's family, then you should say something, but for one extra person, I think it's fine to help keep that family relationship strong.

I'm so sorry you have to deal with that, it's definitely a tough spot to be in.

Have you discussed the details of the event with her? Just wondering if she thinks it'll be a big party and wanted a dance partner for the evening.

I'd suggest discussing it further with your FH. I mean, he should be the one to talk to his sister and let her know she doesn't get a plus one...that nobody is! I'm sure by talking to your FH, you'll find a solution that works best for both of you!!