Guest list

You're very welcome Susan! Let me know if I can help

How is your guest list and search for a venue going?

Thanks... i'm still getting the hang of this site but appreciate the help and kind words.

Thanks for all the suggestions too. I'll check them out.

Hi Susan

I know how difficult it can be to find the right venue! It also depend on the style of reception and ceremony you want to hold and the feeling you want to create. I created this test to help you out:

Test: Find out the perfect venue for your wedding

Do you know what style of venue you are looking for?

To reply to a message you can reply below the line, it will make it easier to read. But don't worry, I liked that you took time to answer and comment everything in my message.

I had a look at your dress! It's BEAUTIFUL!! If you love it, I'm sure your mom would have loved it too

Like you said, I think it's a great idea to invite your mom's friend. I found different ideas you could use for you and your family to honour your mom. They could be a beautiful way to have her present somehow!

10 ways to honour a lost loved one on your wedding day

Would you have a picture of her on your bouquet?

Hi Sierra

The heritage farm looks beautiful, it's rustic but very elegant! Is that the style you are going for?

I'm sure it will be able to welcome all you fiancé's family and have a unique touch. Have you already decided on your decorations?

I'd invite who you want and can afford. If you end up below your venue's minimum, talk to them. I've heard of people being able to add extras like an extra appetizer or a chocolate fountain if they're below they're minimum.

Hi Emilie! Thanks for the welcome. We booked Stonefields, which is a heritage farm, http://stonefieldsweddings.com . It's turned out to be bigger than I had imagined because of my fiances family.

Invite your venues capacity

I'm not sure how it works, I'm planning for 100 people when in actuality we only have 85 on the list, and I've had a few people ask can I come? And I'm feeling bad saying no because we know them, but money wise it's not doable.

Firstly, I'm so sorry about your mom. It must be difficult to plan all of this without her.

Second, My fiance and I just made a list of everyone we would ideally like, and then took a look at what the budget would allow. Our list has been growing and shrinking constantly since then. Also if any family is contributing money, then they get some say in the guest list. My fiance and I made our list, then asked both sets of parents if they wanted to add anyone.

You should definitely not over-invite assuming people will decline! It's a recipe for disaster. I've seen it happen too many times that people over-invited and then everyone rvspd yes and they were stuck with a bill they couldn't really afford. But make sure to invite a bit over your minimum just in case! (for example, we're, as of now, inviting 80 people and our venue min is 60)

As for who to invite, I just think, can I imagine NOT having this person at my wedding? If the answer is yes, then they don't need an invite. It's unfortunate that sometimes you have to make some difficult decisions, but most budgets just don't allow for everyone to be able to come. Try to keep in mind that you have to draw a line somewhere and SOMEONE is always going to be on the other side of that line.

Hi Sierra Welcome to the community!!

I think you're right, it's much better to stick to your budget and invite a number of people you'll feel comfortable with. That will make your wedding much more true to who you are and also save you a lot of unnecessary stress.

What kind of venue did you book? Are you going for the big thing or a more simple wedding?

Hi Susan Welcome to the community!

I'm happy you started this discussion, I think making a guest list can get very tricky and it's always helpful to have people's opinion

I think you'll find this article helpful to break down your guest list into different parts and make sure you have everyone you would really want to be there.

How to Build Your Wedding Guest List

Do you know how many people you'd like to have at your wedding?

I agree with Sierra that it might be a bit risky to invite more people than you actually want or can afford. They might all say yes!! A safer option would be to have your first list and then a second list in case anyone cancels.

If you're worried about having to invite to many people, I just made this discussion for you. I hope you'll find it helpful!

10 questions to cut down your guest list

I'm very sorry to hear about your mom. I'm sure she will be missed at your wedding. Will your other family members be there? Do you have brothers and sisters?

I think it's wonderful that you'd think of inviting your mom's friend, but just make sure this is what you want and don't feel pressured by other people to do so.

Have you booked your venue yet? How has been wedding planning so far?

My Mom passed away with an agressive cancer last year so it's hard for me to not pick a few of her close friends/co-workers as they knew me and seen me grow up. I guess I need to make the list and decide who 'has' to be there and go from there.

Thank you for your replies.

My Fiance comes from a huge family, meanwhile I do not. So if we invited every single person that was in his family we had outrageous numbers and it just did not work with the budget we had agreed on. We need a minimum of 110 guests at our wedding, we are trying to have our guest list stick around 120 because that is doable for our budget. We decided on immediate family, so aunts, uncles etc. and stuck to only 1st cousins that he actually speaks to on a somewhat regular basis. There will be no 2nd cousins, children of children, if he hasn't seen or spoke with them in years than they had to be cut. We really wish we could have everyone but it's just not possible.

It is highly unlikely that there will be more than 10 people who decline to attend. I have heard that it's something like less than 3% of the people you invite will actually decline. So I feel like you are probably better to find a number that works for you and your budget and go with that. I personally wouldn't go too much higher than your minimum just in case all the people you invite actually agree to attend and then you are stuck with the bill for all those people if you go a lot over. Hope this helps.

We made a guest list of everyone that we would want there