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Devoted June 2019 Ontario

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Monica, on September 18, 2018 at 14:24 Posted in Wedding reception 0 15

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I asked my fiance’s sister (future sister-in-law) for help with finalizing their side of the family’s guest list. She mentioned if we would be inviting her husbands parents, brother + wife (+1 kid), and sister (+ 2 kids).

I thought this was completely silly and was kind of taken back as to why I would even consider inviting them? I mean, I would obviously be inviting my fiancé’s sister and her husband along with their 3 children, BUT to invite the husband’s side of the family?!

Am I the only one who seems to think this is unnecessary... or should I reconsider?? To be honest, I’m not particularly fond of these people - even when I have to see them once a year for holiday season, I’m super peeved by their presence... it’s my wedding and I can invite anyone I want, but is this offending anyone?

My fiancé does not want to invite them either - he is not a fan of that side of the family...

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Latest activity by Monica, on September 19, 2018 at 18:32

Devoted June 2019 Ontario
Monica · On September 19, 2018 at 18:32
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Nope! Groom’s mom isn’t overly close with them - they’ll see each other on the odd weekends here and there, but not because it was planned. Just so happens future mother in law lives with future sister in law for the time being, and so her in laws visit on the weekends.
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Expert December 2018 Ontario
Emma · On September 19, 2018 at 18:21
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Usually no the in laws of your future sister in law wouldn’t be invited. But is the grooms family really close with them? Are the grooms parents friends with them? If they are close with the grooms parents then it would be reasonable. But if you guys are paying for the entire wedding then it’s up to you.
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Frequent user September 2018 Quebec
Melissa · On September 19, 2018 at 14:51
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No, you don’t have to invite them. But I have heard of this before, I think it may be an older tradition/etiquette thing.
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WeddingWire Admin October 2016 North Carolina
Lynnie · On September 19, 2018 at 14:44
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Totally unnecessary... that's her family, not yours!!
To gracefully negotiate the conversation I'd say something about "wishing you could invite everyone" but do to the budget or venue capacity you'll need to stick to "my immediate family"!
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Master July 2018 Alberta
Stephanie · On September 18, 2018 at 21:38
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You are under no obligation to invite them. They have no relation to you. If neither of you want them there, just let her know they aren’t close enough to you to invite and you have to limit the guest list somewhere.
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Master August 2019 Ontario
Bianca · On September 18, 2018 at 19:51
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Ugh, I am literally in the same situation as you are where we are obligated to invite FH's brother-in-laws family. It's honestly odd and will end up being costly. FH and I are honestly unimpressed that this is expected by us, but unfortunately it's something that we have to do.
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Master October 2019 Ontario
Allison · On September 18, 2018 at 19:20
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I wouldn't invite the husbands side, especially since you are not close with them!
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Top August 2017 Ontario
Vinod · On September 18, 2018 at 17:19
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No to inviting them since your relationship isn't solid and good. She should know better than asking you instead of her brother.
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Devoted June 2019 Ontario
Monica · On September 18, 2018 at 17:06
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Haha love all your replies!! Thanks ladies for all your input - I kind of threw a fit when my fiancé’s side of the family mentioned it more than once, so I thought I was the crazy one being totally unreasonable.. but thank you for all of your confirmations
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Expert April 2019 Alberta
Michelle · On September 18, 2018 at 15:40
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They really do not need to be invited, especially if neither you or your fiance like them. Put your foot down.
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Super July 2019 Ontario
Jennifer · On September 18, 2018 at 15:37
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I personally wouldn't invite them either. unless he had some sort of relationship with them. however. I have seen it happen at weddings LOTS of times because the parents wanted them invited.
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VIP September 2020 Ontario
Geneviève · On September 18, 2018 at 15:29
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I agree with you, that's does seem like an odd request! If neither of you want them there, then it seems like an easy answer.
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Top October 2019 Manitoba
Tori · On September 18, 2018 at 15:12
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No invite for them. In what world would they ever get an invitation? IMO that is absurd unless you see them multiple times a year and even at that there is no relation to them.
Keep it at just her and her hubby and kids.
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Expert January 2019 Alberta
Maya · On September 18, 2018 at 15:04
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Absolutely not offensive at all. I mean that’s his sisters inlaws family and they have no relation to you and your husband. Especially if their attendance would cause friction then it’s alright to leave them out.
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VIP May 2019 Ontario
Stephanie · On September 18, 2018 at 14:31
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If you and your FH are not a fan of them then dont invite them! Just mention to her that you would like to keep to more immediate family and friends due to guest list limitations! I'm sure itll be fine! I think it's a bit bizarre for her to ask to begin with....
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