Hey ladies, I have one of those venting feelings today, just need to get some stuff off my chest.
For context - One of my bridesmaids is also getting married this year, and I'm in her wedding party. Her and I have been childhood friends for 17 years now and so our parents know each other.
So my bridesmaid is having a backyard/garden wedding and is on a strict budget since they are paying for the wedding themselves. She was looking to do something more casual anyways and overall she's happy with her plans that are coming together. My parents are paying for a part of mine, to which I am grateful, but my mom keeps making comments about my bridesmaid's wedding and how her parents aren't pitching in, which doesn't always happen. The type of comments are along the lines of how casual it is, this isn't how a wedding should be, mine will be better, etc. It's causing a bit of a rift between our parents' relationship to each other and I'm worried my parents aren't gonna go to hers/my parents try to veto my guest list to get her parents off.
The thing is, if my parents weren't contributing financially, I would have to do a more casual wedding myself since I could not afford the more formal one I'm having. I would totally be okay with that, since at the end of the day, I'm getting married no matter what. My bridesmaid and I have talked about how we are equally excited about each wedding since they will be so different, but my mom is putting a damper on my excitement for her wedding. Whenever she pitches an idea, I hear my mom's voice in my head: "I can't believe her parents won't help out so she could do x,y,z differently!" or "It's not a wedding since she's not doing x,y,z..."
I'm more frustrated at my mom and her comments and how if her and my dad didn't contribute, this is the way they would be talking about my wedding. I want to be supportive to my bridesmaid as she plans, but my mom is getting in my head. Whenever my mom talks to me about her wedding, I try to put a more positive spin on it like: "More people are going casual and don't want to be in debt after a wedding" or "I like how she's DIYing x,y,z..." but I still get met with my mom's opinions. It hurts that if I chose to pay my own way, my mom would find a way to voice her negative opinions and make me feel bad.
To anyone who's planning a more casual/backyard/DIY wedding; you are awesome and I hope your wedding is the way you've envisioned it! 
and thanks to everyone who took the time to read this, not looking for solutions, just peeved at my mom.
