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Lynnie
WeddingWire Admin October 2016 North Carolina

Do you check in with each other before making a big purchase?

Lynnie, on February 4, 2019 at 09:05 Posted in Before the wedding 0 27
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Do you check in with your fiancé(e) before making a big purchase and vice versa? Never, always or sometimes?


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Next Question: Do you ever creep through your fiancé(e)'s phone?

Back to the Beginning: Never, Always or Sometimes?

27 Comments

Latest activity by Brittany, on February 13, 2019 at 13:28
  • Brittany
    British Columbia
    Brittany ·
    • Dispute

    Normally I'd say always, but I put a deposit down on a mini-cruise for his 30th birthday without telling him. That was a gift though, so I don't think it counts.

    We have joint banking now, but we don't shop much at all, so we haven't really come across "permission purchases" yet.

    • Reply
  • H
    Curious October 2020 Ontario
    Hayley ·
    • Dispute
    Big purchases always, small purchases, rarely. Sometimes I need to treat myself and I don't think i should ask his permission to do so, like the other day i bought myself a couple books I have been wanting. We share a savings account but whatever is in our chequings is our own.
    • Reply
  • Vinod
    Featured August 2017 Ontario
    Vinod ·
    • Dispute

    Its important though in the beginning it never happened and I was being dragged into situations I didn't like. Eventually, he learned and was put into his place realizing how karma got back to him.

    • Reply
  • Shla
    Devoted October 2021 Ontario
    Shla ·
    • Dispute
    Always. It's easier if we both can account for where money is being spent.
    • Reply
  • Geneviève
    VIP September 2020 Ontario
    Geneviève ·
    • Dispute

    Always. We both like to evaluate decisions before making them and using the other as a second opinion; that goes for big purchases too.

    • Reply
  • Erin
    Super September 2019 Ontario
    Erin ·
    • Dispute

    Always. Even though we both feel like we don't need permission, it's a respect thing.

    • Reply
  • Monica
    Devoted June 2019 Ontario
    Monica ·
    • Dispute
    Always - because if it’s a big purchase, we both should be aware of it and have an opinion on whatever it may be. A car? Home? Even items for the wedding like our cake, flowers etc. It’s not about how much money you have or how much each other makes, it’s about respecting one another and their opinion, as well as keeping your partner in the loop.
    • Reply
  • Robyn
    Super June 2019 Ontario
    Robyn ·
    • Dispute

    Always. He bought a house once when we were dating without telling me and I explained how that was something we maybe should have talked about, so now we both make sure to discuss big purchases beforehand.

    • Reply
  • Bianca
    Master August 2019 Ontario
    Bianca ·
    • Dispute

    Always. We could make those purchases without telling the other, but we're usually very open about money and where it goes.

    • Reply
  • Kaisha
    Super March 2019 Nova Scotia
    Kaisha ·
    • Dispute

    Not really, he makes a lot more money then I do so he sometimes makes purchases without telling me. I don't mind, we aren't hurting for money so its ok.

    • Reply
  • Holly
    VIP June 2019 Ontario
    Holly ·
    • Dispute
    Always! We share a bank account so we definitely give at least a heads up beforehand.
    • Reply
  • Summer
    Devoted May 2019 Ontario
    Summer ·
    • Dispute
    Sometimes yes. I make a lot more money so I purchase what I want/need but usually check in with him first
    • Reply
  • Alexandra
    VIP November 2019 British Columbia
    Alexandra ·
    • Dispute
    Sometimes, but also not really. We still have our own money after we pitch into the wedding fund and also our bills. What happens with that money is up to us.
    • Reply
  • Stephanie
    VIP May 2019 Ontario
    Stephanie ·
    • Dispute

    Oh yeah! Especially since we are saving for wedding/new home, we will clear anything major first! Even all wedding budget decisions have been confirmed with each other (except my dress because that was all my mama!)

    • Reply
  • Kelsie
    Master July 2021 Ontario
    Kelsie ·
    • Dispute
    I think our biggest purchases have been for the wedding, so typically yes. All big decisions will be made together but we won’t be watching the pennies the other person spends.
    • Reply
  • Casey
    Master October 2019 Ontario
    Casey ·
    • Dispute

    Sometimes. I think it depends on what it is. I am in the market for a new car, and know nothing about vehicles so I will for sure check in with that.

    • Reply
  • Stephanie
    Master July 2018 Alberta
    Stephanie ·
    • Dispute
    We do. We look at it at our money so therefore we should be making purchases together. Things like clothes or hobbies we don’t but I would say once it reaches triple digits, we’re talking about it.
    • Reply
  • Allison
    Master October 2019 Ontario
    Allison ·
    • Dispute

    Sometimes, depends on the big purchase: if it's for the home/both of us we definitely check in

    If it's just for me, my FH said "it's 201_ and your money, you do what you want". When I bought my truck last year, he knew I was planning on it, but I never "checked-in" with him on it.

    • Reply
  • Valérie
    VIP September 2019 Quebec
    Valérie ·
    • Dispute

    Sometimes.
    Only if the purchase is for the both of us, we'll check-in with each other.

    • Reply
  • K
    Expert June 2019 Ontario
    Kim ·
    • Dispute
    Usually .. he did purchase a car without discussing it with me in the past and I was kinda pissed about the lack of communication. So now were pretty good about discussing prior to big purchases.
    • Reply
  • Chelsea
    Super June 2020 Alberta
    Chelsea ·
    • Dispute
    Sometimes, mostly if it’s something for the both of us. If i’m spending my own money on me, or if he’s spending his money on him, we don’t bother.
    • Reply
  • Tori
    Top October 2019 Manitoba
    Tori ·
    • Dispute

    Sometimes, but not very often. Just if it's big big purchases like a couch or fridge etc.

    • Reply
  • Amelia
    Super September 2020 Ontario
    Amelia ·
    • Dispute

    I don't think either of us have made any really big purchases. But we will if we do, going forward.

    • Reply
  • Leah
    VIP April 2019 British Columbia
    Leah ·
    • Dispute
    At this point: Always.
    In the future: Sometimes based on an agreed upon amount.
    • Reply
  • Caitlyn
    Super January 2020 Ontario
    Caitlyn ·
    • Dispute

    Always, though we haven't bought anything really big. The biggest was probably a new kitchen table from Ikea which was like $150. For things like that we always go shopping together.

    • Reply
  • Becky
    VIP September 2019 Ontario
    Becky ·
    • Dispute

    We normally do if anything over $500. Its usually something we either split or if he wants something large than he will.

    • Reply
  • Rachael
    Super October 2019 Ontario
    Rachael ·
    • Dispute

    It depends on what the purchase is! Sometimes we do, sometimes we don't. I find that we've both been cautious about bigger purchases as a result of our wedding coming up later this year, though.

    • Reply

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