Can you believe it! "gate Crashers" problems

It’s too early in our planning process for it to happen, but I’d be livid.

Hang in there!

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This reminds me of what our Bestman/Groom's brother did at our wedding.

He's off and on been dating a girl for a year who we ALL know. I had to chase him at the RSVP deadline who he was bringing to the wedding cause he just kept not confirming a name.

He then gives us a RANDOM girls name - who he was bringing as a first date to our wedding.

Apparently 4 days before the wedding, she backed out (which he didn't tell us), and I only found out by accident at the rehearsal dinner the night before.

The night before the wedding he then (without telling us) tried to invite (he did invite her - she just couldnt make it thank god) the girl he's been dating for two years! My husband LOST it on him. So rude not talking to us about anything and the original girls name was on all the seating charts! (he told us just make a new seating chart.. THE DAY OF THE WEDDING)

People are nuts. That's the moral of all these stories.

This is my biggest fear as only about half our guests are invited to the dinner as it is limited seating. I have already delegated my parents to kindly ask them to leave and return for the dance.

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100% agree!!

Wow never thought someone would actually do that! so NOT OK!!

I've had a problem similar with a bridesmaid who doesn't want to take her BF of 4 years and wants to take her "friend" i have never met!

I don't understand why on earth someone would think its OK to bring an uninvited guest OR someone you don't even know that's NOT a boyfriend/ spouse!

I am just sitting here totally shocked that anyone would ever think that is ok???

Only reasonable explanation I can come up with is that your guest was totally joking and that the tone just didn't come through via text?

Did you respond immediately or are you waiting to decide how to respond?

If you haven't' responded yet, I'd suggest responding with a "haha, very funny! In all seriousness tho, I hope they enjoy their time in __. Do you guys need any suggestions for fun things they could do while you're at the wedding?"

Then, if it turns out they are very much not joking, I'd tell them in very clear terms that if they attempt to enter the venue with non-guests in tow, neither they or their "gate crashers" will be allowed in.

***RAAWWWRRRR**** (that's my bridezilla roar... fyi, haha)

Um. No. Heeeeellllll to the no. Tell that "friend" (I'm using the term loosely now because that's so f*ing disrespectful) that if those "crashers" show up, they will be thrown out, along with said friend.

It's your WEDDING. It's not some birthday party at a club and everyone can just crash and hang out... You've spent months, if not years, planning it, you've spent probably 10's of thousands of dollars on it... Gate crashers are NOT OKAY. Especially when they know they've asked and been told not to... GRRRRR.

Be FIRM! Be RUTHLESS! Tell that person you will NOT tell them again, and if you have to deal with that on your wedding day, they will be removed.

That is completely unacceptable and this person clearly doesn't respect you! I don't even know how someone can think that is an acceptable thing to do! I get going to a wedding solo isn't the funnest thing but you gotta respect the bride (and groom)! I don't anger easily but I am PISSED for you girl! I can't believe they had the NERVE to say they would be coming anyways, even AFTER you told them no!

In all seriousness, they need to know that they are NOT allowed to attend. Even if they show up, they won't be served since your caterer has limited amounts of food for actual invited guests. Same thing with booze. If some of your FH's groomsmen have experience as security/bouncers, give them the names/photos of the "gate crashers" that aren't allowed in! Hell, maybe look in to actual security for hire to keep a lookout for uninvited guests. I would uninvite the guest too, I wouldn't want someone like that at my wedding!

I would be uninviting the friend who texted you. That is so disrespectful. I cannot wrap my head around that.

OMG - that is utterly unacceptable! It's completely and totally disrespectful and selfish of your friend to try and pull that - I agree with others. I would be telling your 'friend' that they are welcome to spend the evening with their friends, as now they are free that evening since they are no longer welcome at your wedding either.

We are inviting 'wedding crashers' to our reception dance, but they will have formal invitations. I can not even imagine how I will react if someone tries to pull this at my wedding - my fiancé is a former bouncer and MMA figheter, several of his groomsmen were former bouncers, and yeah - they could (and would!) throw the uninvited 'guests' out!

Sounds like someone needs to be uninvited!! We are experiencing something similar, but they said “she’ll come to the party after” what makes you think I want that woman here drinking our booze and eating our food??? You’ve got another thing comming!!

Have you told this invited guest that this is absolutely unacceptable? Or does this person not give to Flying f’s?

That is completely unacceptable!

If I were you I would tell your guest who invited them that they are to tell these "gate crashers" that they are not welcome and there will be no place for them at your wedding. I would also say that if this doesn't work for them then all 3 of them can find something to do for the evening as they aren't welcome at your wedding.

You could also have someone be an usher and have a guest list to check off names and if they show up and their names aren't on the list, turn the people away.

I would have lost my mind had this happened to me.

Yeah I’d be pissed if someone did that to me too! Especially after I already expressed myself. I did purposely invite “wedding crashers” for 9pm though, they know better not to come any earlier because they won’t have a seat.

What?!?! People actually do that?!? Tell the guest not to bother coming. Lol. Wow. I’m actually shocked at the audacity of some people! I would lose my mind on a person who texted me that

Yeah, I'm angry for you! Hey, come on the trip to Winnipeg, sure - but find something else to do the evening of the wedding!!! Totally rude and unacceptable.

I wouldn't be happy either! That is a very nervy thing to ask period. You have enough on your plate without all this added stress!

I’d be furious. My temper ain’t easy to deal with either. I would recommend telling your friend that if these people dare show up at your wedding uninvited that them and your friend will be escorted out because you’ve paid a hell of a lot of money for this wedding, and that’s completely unacceptable on so many levels. Just no. I can’t even tell you how angry I am on your behalf right now. People are just so rude and disrespectful and they have no idea how much weddings actually cost!

I'd flip my lid for sure. Youhave every right to be angry!

Girllllllll!!! Smh. No damn class... they clearly have none. Ready that I was laughing and I read it in my “oh no you didn’t” voice. But good for you. Stand your ground. The nerve of people. I would say if they come back. Unfortunately dinner will not be provided as final number are confirmed. And leave it at that. They didn’t even ask to just come to their party part. Tuh! Ain’t NOBODy got time

Wow sorry but your friend is a jerk. “Sorry, no” “well I’m gonna go ahead and do it anyway and you’ll just have to deal with it”. Some friend. I’d seriously lose it with anyone who did that. Kudos to you for dealing with such blatant disrespect diplomatically

I also love the suggestions on here about us gatecrashing your wedding to stop these gatecrashers

WOAH! Yeah i would flip ... I have no shame in telling disrespectful guests exactly how much it is costing me to host them, as well as provide them with a list of people we had to cut in order to stay on budget- spelling out clearly how illogical it is that they want you to host total strangers when you had to cut people you actually know and care about from your guestlist. That would hopefully knock some sense into them? And if that goes over their head or they dont seem to care... I would tell the invited guest I'm happy to take back their invite to the wedding so they can enjoy the entire weekend with their friends on their roadtrip together. No nonsense hereXD
Good luck!

I did bring it up to our friends and worst part is he claims he gave us $100 for the wedding at our buck & buck. Yet, nothing at the wedding itself and still fed them on our expense. Thats the obnoxious part of him.

Personally, everyone suggesting to have her escorted is right knowing she is wrong and doesn't want to admit it.

I wouldn't even feed her or her friends to be honest if she wants to behave that bad and let her feel it. The other way to get her attention is to email her and really her straight up the truth if she does show up with her friends, she will never have any contact with you after your day and not getting your time during that evening.

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Thanks Emma, I definitely was so irritated, it is very rude and offensive! Neither the invited guest or "gate crashers" will be welcomed in if that happens!

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Right Vinod, I just have a hard time understanding it! Oh my that would upset me too, I probably wouldn't speak to the guest after the wedding either, how rude and inconvenient for you and your hubby!

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Aww thanks Holly, appreciate it! This site is so supportive I love it! I definitely will have a problem if she goes against what I said, I reiterated again to her that there will be no seats available for any "gate crashers". Hopefully they don't try to come negotiate at the door, because the invited guest won't be welcomed in either if that happens!

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Thanks Megis appreciate it! The last weeks are definitely hectic for sure! Hope you have an amazing wedding, can't wait for you to share photos !

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Yasss Bianca LOL, thank you for that! I was literally lost for words!

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Right, I literally couldn't believe what I was reading, I had to check like 4 times LOL! I do have a day-of-coordinator that is offered by the venue so I will let them know, thanks Clarissa!

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Right, literally had me lost for words!!

Tell your guest that these people will not be allowed in and will be asked to leave. I would be so pissed that I would tell the guest that if these people show they (meaning the guest) will be asked to leave as well. Call them out and tell them how rude and offensive they are being. It’s not funny.

Talking about Gate crashers, its sad that people choose to do things their way and not care about friends.

I had heard on our day a guest (friend) texted a MOH he was bringing hid boyfried and mother when the invite said 1. I wad pissed when he approached me asking where his mother will sit. Since the wedding, my husband and I don't talk to him.

Okay..so I'm so angry for you! I would tell that invited guest that neither she or her friends are welcome and will receive security/police escort if they attempt entrance. That is the most disrespectful thing I've ever heard of a guest doing, and it is 100% unacceptable! I really hope you're able to get this situation under control with no issues from that guest or her friends. I'm so sorry you're dealing with this unnecessary stress so close to the big day.

I also second Bianca's idea, we will show up as security! Trust me they won't want to deal with this pregnant lady I can tell you that! Lol