Bridesmaids help regarding dress/colour/theme

Thanks we are paying for everything ourselves but we are also trying to do everything ourselves. I am designer by trade with a project manager designation. So as I do projects for a living its all transferable skills right So I have lots of ideas and I do not like to ask others for for help as I hate relying on others for anything.

Sadly my fiance has 4 siblings overseas and none of them are going due to cost as its 7K for them to attend vs. 1K for Canadians for the exact same week. He has one brother 10km away but its a long story and as he likes to be the centre of attention and its our day he is not going. Same reason he did not go to my fiance graduation from his post graduate studies, the day he became licensed in Canada after 7 years of sturggling, his 40th birthday or the day he became a Canadian. His father cannot travel for additional reasons. He will only has his mother attending. Although we have 50 guest the majority are my friends and family, my friends from the gym, current and former colleagues of mine and my parents.

I met the bridesmaid through my fiance 6+ years ago as they are from the same country and she knew his brother. We saw here through many boyfriends, had numerous dinner parties, we were there she gave birth to her son the same day as my partner birthday.

As my parnter works 80 hours weeks, and I work 50-60 and it difficult to make time. I also had breast cancer in 2013 and have MS so we are low maintence people. We do not own a home or have a car. We do not have brand name clothes, purses or shoes etc. When you are diagosed with serious health issue one has a different outlook on life. I was blind for 3 months and I was told I would be in a wheelchair by 45 and I have spent more time in hospitals than the average person or one woudl like so we try to make the most of what we have. We travel when we can and we try to live life to the fullest. We cannot have kids due to my chemotherapy so we try to enjoy life hence a destination wedding. My parents have never been on a plane and are in their 70's and are petrified of flying but they know how imporant culture and traveling are to me.

We have a lot of stress in our life and I was hoping to have a stress free wedding or at least as stress free and drama free as possible wishful thinking.

You wedding sounds lovely... I think when you agree to be a bridesmaid you are agreeing to wear any color/style the bride wants... Are you close friends, family, is this unexpected or just how she is?

Thanks Bethany you raised a good point. If she does not like dresses in Canadian stores, does not want to go shopping with the other maid of honor then she won't want to help at all with the planning.

If she's a dramatic person in general I would just cut her out. It's nice when the wedding party accommodates to the bride and not when the bride has to accommodate to the wedding party. If it's something you're willing to compromise on then let it go, but if it's something that is bothering you that is okay too. If she's putting up a fuss now she will prob put up a fuss later about god knows what else. I cut my maid of honour out of my wedding , not cuz she was difficult, but because she wasn't interested in my wedding or helping out at all. It's okay to cut ppl.