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Curious September 2019 Ontario

Bridesmaid's Guest Dilemma

Kait, on September 13, 2018 at 17:01 Posted in Wedding fashion 0 7

I have selected my bridesmaids dress colour and the groomsmen's are wearing navy suit with Burgundy tie and tan shoes. My one bridesmaid is making her boyfriend colour coordinate with her which is normally fine but when she told me he will be wearing the same thing as the groomsmens (same suit, shoes and tie) which kind of put me off....what would you do?


Latest activity by Kait, on October 14, 2018 at 15:14
  • Kait
    Curious September 2019 Ontario
    Kait ·
    • Dispute

    Thank You everyone! It all worked out as I asked her to have him wear a different colour tie as she's not attending the wedding as a guest where most people coordinate with their significance others. Thanks for all the advices!

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  • Catherine
    Frequent user July 2020 Quebec
    Catherine ·
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    Ouf that is a little delicate, but I agree with what the others have said. However to hint at a different color suit may be difficult. He maybe only has 1 suit (navy), so unless he is renting/purchasing one specifically for your wedding, perhaps suggest that he wear a different color tie? Many men nowdays wear navy suits instead of grey or black. It's trendy now.
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  • Peggy
    Super May 2019 Alberta
    Peggy ·
    • Dispute

    Yup, Tori and Brittany have hit it on the head. You can't really tell her/him 'no' but you can try and guide it a different direction. Suggest a different suit base (Perhaps grey), or a different colour tie and shirt.

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  • Clarissa
    Expert October 2018 Saskatchewan
    Clarissa ·
    • Dispute
    Ya unfortunately you will probably have quite a few male guests showing up in that same combination. It's unfortunate but you can't dictate what your guests wear. I understand the frustration because I'm sure you put a lot of thought into it but vent here and not to her.

    Did your bridesmaid know that's what the groomsmen are planning to wear? And would her boyfriend have another suit/shoe combo to wear? Because I would not be expecting him to go buy something new just because it's so close to the groomsmen.
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  • Tori
    Top October 2019 Manitoba
    Tori ·
    • Dispute

    I agree with Brittany on this one. The most you can do is try and guide her in a different direction. Perhaps you could bring it up by mentioning something like "Oh, so let me get this straight - he's wearing a navy suit, with tan shoes, and a burgundy tie? Isn't that what the groomsmen are wearing?" and basically go from there. If she automatically gets offended then I would leave it at that and just say that you thought it was a little funny. The only other reactions that I would expect is for her to agree and not care, or to realize that it is in fact what they will be wearing and say that she will be looking at maybe getting different colour shoes or something for him.

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  • Brittany
    British Columbia
    Brittany ·
    • Dispute

    Because she is one of your bridesmaids, she should be okay with you gently guiding her towards a different colour combo. You aren't technically dictating what a guest should wear, your deterring a bridesmaid, who knows what the groomsmen are wearing, from getting her bf to match her.

    There must be another colour combo that is also complimentary with her dress colour. Start by asking nicely, and go from there. She may just not have thought it was a big deal, and hopefully can adapt. It's 2 years away, I'm sure he can find a different colour suit.

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  • Alissa
    Frequent user September 2020 British Columbia
    Alissa ·
    • Dispute
    Irritating... she should be more considerate. But unfortunately a bride can only dictate what her party wears, not her guests. I went to a wedding where the bridesmaids were in long black dresses...along with half the guests and the bride was upset. I only knew of one guest that phoned her to maken sure she wasnt showing up dressed in her BM colors. Navy with tan shoes is a pretty popular combination right now..she should really know better but i probably wouldnt say anything as i wouldn't expect him to be the only guy showing up dressed that way. As long as they have full understanding that he is not in the bridal party...
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