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Corinne
Newbie September 2023 Alberta

Body insecurities

Corinne, on October 28, 2022 at 21:52 Posted in Plan a wedding 1 10

I just went to try on dresses for our Sept 30, 2023 wedding and I cried, and am still crying. I've never been so upset with my body until today. At least I have time to lose weight, but it feels so overwhelming right now.

Anyone else feeling the same struggle?

10 Comments

Latest activity by Linda, on November 22, 2022 at 17:20
  • Julie
    Featured May 2023 Ontario
    Julie ·
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    So sorry to hear that. Remember that the size of the wedding dress is not actually your size. It's a "bridal size". to accommodate the average woman. When I tried mine on it said size 12 Smiley surprise but the lady reminded me of this so I felt so much better. Went home after and got back into my size 8 Smiley laugh

    Definitely don't let this get you down. Your FH proposed because he loves you.

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  • Corinne
    Newbie September 2023 Alberta
    Corinne ·
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    They did have dresses in my sizes, which was nice. It's just the fact that I am the size that I am right now Smiley ups

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  • KELLY
    Featured October 2023 Ontario
    KELLY ·
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    I am so sorry to hear that Corinne, I knew I was going to feel the same so I planned a few things and in the end I was okay. I went to my appt with all of the accessories I will wear at my wedding, and luckily had my makeup trial that morning. I kept telling myself that my FH loves me with my curves, jiggles and greying hair and he will love me on our wedding too. In the end the dress I picked checked off all the boxes but I didn't have that feeling you see on tv and according to the tag it's 4 sizes bigger compared to my everyday size.

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  • Malyssa
    Featured October 2022 Alberta
    Malyssa ·
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    The world is a pretty cruel place for women (and to men too) when it comes to our bodies and clothing. The moment something doesn't fit, we immediately feel we are the problem and that we need to lose weight, but ultimately, clothes should fit us, not the other way around. But its also a hard thing to overcome. I dont know how many times I have go into a change room and just cried because my "normal" size didnt fit. And saying "just love your body" isnt the magic words that will instantly make you feel better.

    Maybe something to think about is this: you said you were happy with your body until you tried on dresses - what was it that made you upset? did you only try on dresses that were smaller sized or based off your street size? was it the style or did you try multiple styles? (I only ask this because my heart was set on one style and made me look absolutely horrible, so I went a different route)

    sending positive vibes your way in your dress shopping task.

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  • A
    Newbie October 2023 Quebec
    Amalia ·
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    You are definitely not alone! The struggle is real!

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  • Jenn
    Devoted August 2023 Ontario
    Jenn ·
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    I hear you. I have always actually been on the smaller side, but over the last maybe 5 years, I have gained a lot of weight (think size 6 to 10/12). I lost about 30lbs in the process of trying on dresses, and picking up the one I ordered - and I was starting to get my confidence back...only to gain that weight back again, and then some. Not having sports due to covid def. didn't help, but still doesn't make it easier to come to terms with!! And when I visit my dress, I am still in love with it, but picture how it fit me the day I picked it up.

    I spent this evening looking at the gyms in my area, and their fitness classes (I need a class, I can't just go to a gym), that won't break the bank, with classes I like, that can supplement my soccer now that it is back.

    I also find FitOn a great app - the paid version is affordable, provides meal plans, and you can pick your workout based on time, target area, and style of workout (Hiit, pilates, Yoga, Barre, etc.), and you can workout with friends. Even if I only do a 10 min workout this evening, I still feel I accomplished something.

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  • Vinod
    Featured August 2017 Ontario
    Vinod ·
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    We all feel insecure with our bodies in some ways. I too feel it now than before because of the tiredness and less relaxing time. I felt great being a stick and then having to go to feeling average and out of the clothing size for my outfits. Just know you love yourself and can find something that will give your body the great outlook while dress shopping and will overcome the body in secureness. Be strong and confident to know you are going to aim towards your goal and get your dress to look great.

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  • Carine
    Featured September 2023 Ontario
    Carine ·
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    I can so relate, also we are wedding twins, I am also getting married on September 30th, 2023.

    I was always a big girl and had surgery done and lost over 100pounds, met my Fiance and well let's just say I have gained a lot of weight, trying dress made me ashamed of the hard work I went through to lose that weight, physically and mentally. Going to try on dresses reality hit that I was big again and now I have to work hard again. I beat myself up, I was small, happy confident, felt gorgeous and now I feel blah, confidence gone. Have a year to lose and get that confidence back, hoping to lose enough to the point I am proud again, lose enough to feel like a gorgeous bride. We all have those insecurities, but you have a year to work on yourself. To change. But don't let it take you over.

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  • Hank
    Featured September 2021 Ontario
    Hank ·
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    You should call the bridal shop and see if they have anything in your size to try before going there. While they can make any dress into your size, having some stock available that you can try on will boost your confidence as opposed to holding up a dress that doesn't fit you and hoping it works out without trying it on.

    It happens to men too when we try suits on. If we don't fit into a standard size, suit shopping can be frustrating. And ready-made suits are designed with perfect symmetry, something that most people's bodies just aren't, so despite being perfectly healthy or fine, the experience can make it seem like we're flawed.

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  • K
    Featured August 2022 Ontario
    K1327 ·
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    Aww I am so sorry to hear that! Wedding dress shopping can honestly not be so glamorous - I think we have all had a little breakdown in a change room at some point (wedding dress shopping or not). Just try to embrace the beautiful body you have and try and keep your spirit up, it is suppose to be fun and enjoyable : )

    Also - I am sure when you find a style that works so well with your shape, that will really help and it is out there, trust! : )

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