Are you Eloping if Cancelling?

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Thank you! This is exactly how I feel! We have been together for 5 years and have had an 18 month engagement as well. I just don't want to have to wait another year for this day to come. In the end, neither of us is big on having a large wedding, we originally even talked about just eloping with our parents, but our families really put up a stink and we ended up with a guest-list of over 200. In the end I just want to marry my FH. I don't care (however selfishly) who gets to witness it, as long as we're together. I like the idea of having an event next summer when everything is cleared back to normal - maybe just a social or reception. I think we will elope, just the two of us on our date. Thanks so much for your insight - you looked gorgeous btw!!

Hey Marcy!


I had the same questions and my main concern was whether or not I would regret getting eloped and not waiting to get married in front of all of my friends and family. We ultimately decided to elope on April 18th (the original date) because the date itself is very significant to us. Honestly if the date wasn’t important we most likely would have waited until our new date (April 17 2021).
I have no regrets about getting married and we’re both so happy that we did. We also had an 18month engagement and were together for 4 years prior so we couldn’t bare the thought of waiting any longer to start our future. Our original officiant said if we got eloped we wouldn’t get the whole “announce you as husband and wife”, or ring exchange next year as it’s already been done but it’s our wedding so we decided to drop her and go with someone who embraced our elopement and have a friend perform the ceremony next year to our specifications (especially cause we’re already married so we don’t have to worry about legalities).
We had only a few family members tune in via Zoom because we still want our ceremony of vow renewal next year to be special and the first time most will see us exchange vows.
99% of people were excited for us but you always have a few who feel as though they are the most important part of the day and those people were not hesitant to voice their frustrations. I just remind myself that they do not play a big part in our marriage and that’s what getting eloped was all about.
My FH had no idea I was going to wear my wedding dress and I think a little surprise like that made the day even more special. I wish you the best of luck deciding and hope that I helped!
I found in the end what helped us make a decision was to remember what was most important to us.
Cheers! 🎉🤍

We eloped on our front lawn with just our 2 witnesses and officiant. Our family watched from their cars since they were against an online wedding. We also provided lots of entertainment for the neighbours - some how most of them found out and were watching with beer and lawn chairs in their own driveways. We decided we're going to have the reception in a year or so and renew our vows then for everyone who missed it in person.

Our date is the same as yours. We are holding out things will give soon. The hall is a limit of 15 during all this so if anything it just limits us to close family. Which is fine but it's not ideal. We are more nervous about the officiant cancelling or the hall remaining closed like it is right now. More so the officiant because it's very very important to me that everyone witnesses the signing. I'm trying hard not to focus on it too much until the summer. I'm still going forward with everything like normal. I'm lucky it's very lowkey and small to begin with but I know others arnt as lucky. If the officiant is still willing but the hall isnt then we will probably do it in someone's backyard or house but I really dont want to do that haha

These times are hard to tell what's bound to happen. Postponing the wedding date seems right if you want to have your family and friends present and the marriage certificate that time available.
Eloping is a great alternative though not knowing if the church or Officiant of your choice will want to take the chance at this time and no marriage license to sign due to city halls closed. Its best to check in your area if your marriage license is available to get first. Celebration later on the year with family and friends can take place as they will be present.

Our date is at the end of September and we're holding off making any decisions yet. Our first round of invites were supposed to go out soon but I think we're going to scrap the second round so we can send out one round later. Regardless though, we'd actually prefer a smaller wedding so I think we're going to do our best to keep our date and just reduce our guest list as needed. Just close family would be about 45 guests and if push comes to shove, we'll try do it with like 12.

Our wedding was end of May, we’ve postponed it to Sept for now hoping things improve. We still want to keep our date so we are “eloping”, just doing a quick thing and sign the papers. But we’ll have a ceremony and reception, I still want it all...even if it comes later.

View quoted message That’s too bad! But it’s nice that you were able to find a new date that worked with with your vendors. All the best to you guys!

View quoted message That’s a great idea! Love the thought of an anniversary reception.

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I know what you mean! FH and I will have been together for 13 years this July 25th and it just happened to land on a Saturday this year, so our date had some real meaning. But our new date will be June 12, 2021 which doesn't have any special meaning, it was just the date that worked for all my vendors to be re-booked.

Ours is planned for October 2. I'm hoping we can elope, but if we need to wait it won't kill me.


If we do elope we have talked about having an anniversary reception next year to get everyone together. We can have a symbolic ceremony for our parents and friends to see and have the traditional trappings like cake, toasts, and dancing. I fell in love with 2 dresses and part of me is saying "go get dress number 2, one for each day!".
You could do a small ceremony if you want people there, I would hope that those who can't be invited would understand that there are government restrictions on how many people you can have gathering (I know with some people this is asking a lot!) And then do a bigger party later.

View quoted message We’ve thought of that also. It’s so hard because we were so looking forward to the day. Have you picked out a new date?

FH and I were supposed to be getting married at the end of July, and eloping was the first thought we had when all of this started escalating. But when we thought about it more, it just wouldn't be the wedding we had envisioned. Being married is important to us, but it's more about our families coming together in our eyes and we can't imagine getting married without our families and friends being there. So we decided postponing was the better option for us and what we wanted. So just keep in mind what you and your FH want and what's important to you.

We postponed from May to November... but I have little faith it will go as planned. I think if we are able to secure a marriage license by then and there are still restrictions, we will likely get married before the end of the year. I am not keen on postponing the celebrations AGAIN and rather cancel, but my FH would still like to hold a reception to celebrate with family in the future.