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Colleen
Newbie June 2022 Alberta

2021 weddings. Plan for best or worst case scenario?

Colleen, on August 12, 2020 at 10:09 Posted in Plan a wedding 3 20
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Hello everyone Smiley smile
I don’t typically post on group forums but these discussions are so supportive and informative, that I don’t feel intimidated !

I got engaged last month and I feel like it’s been very tough (and a little depressing) to plan in light of COVID..
My question to the 2020 brides who are postponing and the 2021 brides - are you planning your wedding assuming COVID will still be here ? (Ie 50 person limits etc) or are you planning assuming restrictions will be lifted by this time and we’ll be back to “normal” ?
If the first is true (planning under worst case scenario) - how do you stay positive ? My family has been wonderful at helping me still plan the day of my dreams and I realize I’m already so lucky and fortunate to be able to plan a wedding in the first place ! Just wondering how you ladies (or men!) are keeping your spirits high in the current circumstances Smiley smile

20 Comments

Latest activity by Tiara, on October 14, 2020 at 16:38
  • T
    Newbie October 2022 Ontario
    Tiara ·
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    We're getting married then too! (October 23rd, 2021)

    Don't worry though, OP, I know it is super stressful but take the COVID time as a way to enjoy the planning process. Best way is to get a venue, etc. that can accomodate all of your scenarios just so you feel less stressed if things change. Take it one day at a time and don't forget to enjoy the little moments. With covid, I basically have everything planned and tucked away in waterproof containers. You got this! Be sure to celebrate each and every little moment, you deserve it!

    I'm a "worst case scenario" planner. What we decided to do was have a Group A and a Group B. A being your absolute mandatory people for worst case COVID- 50 people indoors) you would send save the dates and invites to them. If covid restrictions aren't as heavy in 2021, then we would send invites to Group B. We minimized our numbers for the worst case scenario by not having kids (for covid safety reasons) and plus ones (for friends and family friends).

    I also opted for electronic Save the Dates- using the weddingwire website that you can create, that way we can email everyone directly and they can check the website for updates for COVID.

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  • Alyssa
    Curious December 2021 Alberta
    Alyssa ·
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    We became engaged and start planning right away in late 2019/early 2020 - so initially we were going to have a "smaller wedding of 80 people" - I laugh cause this is a big wedding now! Anyways, we are continuing to move forward as planned. We likely won't make a guest list cut down till closure to sending invitation (in December) and after that we'll try and keep guests updated as much as possible.

    Currently, are plan is to get too December and based on the standard in December send out invites based on the government guidelines. Then continue to plan food, drinks, etc. based on that number.

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  • Audrey
    Frequent user July 2022 Ontario
    Audrey ·
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    Congrats Colleen and everyone on your engagements. I just got engaged last week, and am excited to start planning but also feel like my hands are tied a bit. I have immediate family living in the US and Nova Scotia, and close friends in the US and Montreal areas so there will be a good amount of travel on my side of the guest list. I feel I can't pick a date or even a season (which would influence my colours and fashions) until we see how the pandemic evolves in the next 3-6 months, especially after kids go back to school. For now I'm holding off, and just creating pinterest boards of things I love so when the time comes I'll have inspiration to draw from and a more clear idea of what I want. It's hard though, I want to start picking venues and building a wedding website (but my colours and season influence that too) and all that fun stuff...

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  • Olivia
    Frequent user October 2021 Ontario
    Olivia ·
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    Congratulations!!
    My wedding isn’t until October 23rd if 2021, with it being so far away we are planning our wedding as normal. We have a guest list of approx 130 people and we plan on inviting all of them. I am quite optimistic when it comes to planning, I really try to think about the fact that so many things have reopened and the gathering number has already increased, I really think by the end of next year everything will be fine!! It is very difficult to remain positive when you constantly hear the pandemic will be around for a long time, but I just avoid those conversations. Being engaged and planning your wedding is supposed to be a super happy time, don’t let people’s negativity or pessimistic views ruin the fun of planning!
    Of course with all that being said if the restrictions have not been lifted then of course we will re-look at things but as of right now I’m planning for best case!
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  • Kim
    Frequent user June 2022 British Columbia
    Kim ·
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    Congratulations on your engagement!

    I am very recently engaged as well (as of a week ago), and we are completely going into it in the mindset of covid restrictions - our guest list is 30 people, including us. I've had a friend who had to postpone their wedding to next year, and I'm stressing out for them! The thought of having to either completely abandon plans for a large wedding or postponing again sounds awful.

    As others have mentioned as well, the day really is just about you marrying the love of your life, so that should be the focus.

    Keep your head up and just do whatever makes the both of you happy Smiley smile

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  • Megan
    Newbie June 2023 British Columbia
    Megan ·
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    Congratulations on your engagement !!!

    My fiance and I are planning a small wedding with about 60 guests + we will add day guests if covid allows for it, we are also having our wedding outdoors at a campsite with cabins so we are hoping it will be fine our wedding is planned for July.31st/2021, we are really hoping things will settle down by then i really don't want to have a wedding with masks i want to see everyone's beautiful faces!!!!

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  • R
    Beginner December 2020 Alberta
    Rachelle ·
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    Congrats on your engagement! Such an exciting time.

    Our wedding is August 28, 2021 in Alberta and we are cautiously optimistic that restrictions will be more relaxed although we have a plan b in place to be safe. We are having a smallish wedding (70 guests). Even if COVID is more under control, we will still be taking precautions.

    I talk to my MOH often when I am feeling overwhelmed about it all and that helps me to stay calm. I think you should definitely allow yourself to be excited (but realistic) because there are a lot of things you can do even with the current global situation! At the end of the day, marrying the love of your life is the goal and COVID or not you will get that. Enjoy this time as much as possible.

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  • Alexa
    Beginner July 2021 Alberta
    Alexa ·
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    I also got engaged a month ago, and so far I’m planning with the hope that the restrictions will be lifted. I am aware that I may have to change my plans, but so far I’m just hoping for the best.
    I also think that it’s good to be flexible, and adjust as needed. All I know is whatever happens, happens; I will adjust for what I need too! Smiley smile I think it’s great to also have a “backup” plan for if there is restrictions but to focus on what you want until you know for sure what next year has in store.
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  • Amelia
    Master October 2020 New Brunswick
    Amelia ·
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    Congratulations on your engagement! And welcome to wedding wire 🥳


    We've kept our ceremony in 2020 and right now it's just immediate family and our wedding party who will be there. Our hope for next year is to have our reception on our anniversary and have that be as normal as possible. Our province is very fortunate to have low cases and if that continues I'm hopeful for a little normalcy next year. My biggest concern if that my fiance's family won't be able to enter the country, they are missing the wedding this year as crossing the border and the 14 day isolation just isn't feasible yet.
    I have a recently engaged friend who skipped 2021 dates and is planning for 2022 in hopes that we are totally normal by then.
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  • Megan
    Curious April 2022 Ontario
    Megan ·
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    We moved our May 2020 wedding to April 2021 and we are somewhat assuming covid will still be around but will have lighter restrictions. We were originally having a destination wedding so our wedding numbers were only about 40 people or so anyway, but now we are having the wedding locally so more people are able to come but we are still keeping it around 50 people just in case restrictions are still around. I am hoping restrictions will be lowered a little by then as I have my sister flying from the UK for my wedding but we have told other family members in the UK that we will be streaming the wedding through zoom so they can still be there in some way. We are staying positive about this all but I am still asking all my vendors about any kind of covid policy should we have to move the wedding again.

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  • S
    Newbie February 2024 Texas
    Sydney ·
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    Hey there!

    Congrats on the engagement!!

    I postponed my 2020 wedding to 2021 and i felt pretty deep depression at first, but time does kind of help with adjusting expectations a little bit. For now, I am planning for the worst.

    If you haven't booked vendors yet, just make sure certain things are worked into your venue contract (such as being flexible without financial penalty if government has restrictions in place). Or if they allow, to sign initially for a lower guest count/spend amount - We are kind of locked into a minimum spend =/ so if you can avoid that situation that might be best. All depends on what you want, and your situation of course. If things improve, then you might be able to increase guest count later depending on the venue's capacity.

    In terms of trying to stay positive, I just try to think of how to enjoy the now. If you can, try to get some engagement photos, have fun with different ideas/themes even if it might need to be done on a smaller scale.

    The other thing that i try to focus on is what will be important regardless if restrictions are in place or not. For example anything that relates to the two of you, (your outfits, wedding bands, marriage license, things you might like to say in your vows), your bridal party, immediate family etc.

    Hope this helps, I know its tough but i guess we just gotta make the best of whatever we can. Good luck!

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  • A-W
    Frequent user May 2021 Ontario
    A-W ·
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    Congratulations!


    We had our 2020 wedding already planned so when we moved the date back in April from June 2020 to May 2021 we kept the same guest list and everything (about 120 people) as if restrictions wouldn't be in place. If restrictions are still in place we are cancelling and having a 25 person wedding in my sisters back yard on the new date. The more I think about having a small backyard wedding the more excited I get about it, so it is keeping my spirits high since I think both of the options we have planned are really exciting.
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  • Marg
    Curious August 2021 Ontario
    Marg ·
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    Planning for May 2021. We're cautiously optimistic but are lucky enough to have a vision that might just work with only a few modifications if no further restrictions are lifted. Our venue is historical and has it's own restrictions on dancing (a horror for some I imagine, but okay by us!) so no worries there. It also has decent outdoor space, so if we need to feed everyone outside, it can work. We're keeping our numbers down, and have accepted that buffets are a thing of the past!

    If an intense lock down happens again, I think we'll just have to call it and elope, which obviously isn't the right choice for everybody. I'm still wearing my dress though haha

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  • Cindy
    Frequent user May 2021 Alberta
    Cindy ·
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    Congratulations on your engagement. How exciting.

    We postponed our July 31, 2020 wedding to May 21, 2021. As our wedding was already on the small side with only 65 guests, I am going to proceed as is for now. However we have talked about getting married next year no matter what as the disappointment of having to postpone was enough to go though only once for me.

    I am still thinking positively hoping that restrictions will be lifted a bit more but I for sure know things will not be back to normal so I am prepared for it. Hang in there.

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  • Megan
    Frequent user April 2021 Ontario
    Megan ·
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    I agree with Kelsie completely - we're planning for the worst and hoping for the best. I actually can't even confirm what the wedding reception will be like until we get closer to the actual date based on the restrictions at the time.

    I think you can still get excited about booking all of your vendors, getting a bridal party together, etc. It will still be a REALLY special day, and think of it this way - your wedding will probably be the best social event since covid-19 started, just in a 'new normal' kind of way.

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  • Kaitlyn
    Frequent user August 2022 Ontario
    Kaitlyn ·
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    Hi Colleen! Congrats on your engagement! We got engaged earlier this year right before COVID hit. We booked all our vendors during covid and have booked for the end of June 2021. That being said we are hoping for the best but planning for the worst. We have a 200 person guest list and as of right now we are planning on inviting all of them. We did however make sure that our vendors were flexible with respect to numbers in the event covid causes restrictions and we have to cap our invites. My fiance and I decided that regardless of what happens we will get married on our date, and if we have to postpone our reception we will do that and have a party at a later date.

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  • Vinod
    Featured August 2017 Ontario
    Vinod ·
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    Congrats on your engagement!

    Its great to hear your family is very supportive and giving a helping hand for your wedding. Its tough to keep calm and cool while thinking of how limited we are to have such a small wedding this year. The best thing of this is to know you can have family and closest friends in town to attend. Next year would be great to have a full celebration of your choice Anniversary, Vow Renewal, or Non-Official wedding for guests to be present.

    Covid has thrown us all off routine and alternating to just have an intimate celebration for now. Don't let the times get you down, neither the planning. Keep on rolling as they say.

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  • Hank
    Featured September 2021 Ontario
    Hank ·
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    Hi Colleen,


    First off, congratulations on your engagement! I hope you'll find the help and support you need for your wedding planning here.
    Our wedding is slated for December but it will very likely be pushed to March of next year. We're proceeding as if Stage 3 covid measures will still be in effect. We don't want to put energy into a big wedding only for it to change last minute. The last thing we'd want is to invite tons of people and then rescind the invite.
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  • Kelsie
    Master July 2021 Ontario
    Kelsie ·
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    We’re planning as Covid will still be here. Without a vaccine, and to be honest even with a vaccine, I think the measures in place will be in place for a long time to come.


    I was a really positive person thinking my july wedding was going to go ahead this year; and now for my September wedding next year I’m not having the same attitude so I’m not disappointed.
    That being said, I think the limit will be more than 50 people. I think there will be sanitizer next to every table and bathroom and door, I think wait staff will be wearing masks and gloves - I just don’t know whether guests will have to wear masks.
    It’s wait and see at this point but I think a second wave is coming this fall for sure, and until there’s a vaccine in place, these measures will stick around.
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  • Amanda
    Featured August 2022 British Columbia
    Amanda ·
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    My fiance and I are planning as normal at this moment for next summer. We had to postpone our August 8 2020 wedding to August 7 2021 back in May. We'll probably re look at everything in the new year when our date gets closer and if we need to change a few things, then we will. We don't want to postpone a second time. My fiance and I are staying positive by just knowing that we will get a dream wedding at our amazing winery one way or another and that most of our family will be there with us

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