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T
Newbie July 2022 Newfoundland and Labrador

Which one do I pick for my MOH?

Tanya, on August 11, 2019 at 11:03 Posted in Before the wedding 0 13

I've started the wedding planning process little over a month ago and I've come to a crossroads. My sister has "claimed" the title of bridesmaid ever since we were children. BUT my best friend has already contributed to my engagement/wedding planning more than anyone, she hosted a massive engagement party at her house, invited and planned it, surprised me with it. I really feel like I want my best friend to be my MOH, shes my rock and I am hers. I don't want to destroy my sister but I feel lost in this decision.

Any advice is super appreciated - or if anyone has ever had two MOHs I want to know how that went haha.

13 Comments

Latest activity by Tanya, on September 11, 2019 at 19:35
  • T
    Newbie July 2022 Newfoundland and Labrador
    Tanya ·
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    Thanks Rayanne! Going with my gut and having to MOH's support me on the day!

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  • T
    Newbie July 2022 Newfoundland and Labrador
    Tanya ·
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    This is the plan! Thank you for your advice Smiley heart I'm planning on my sister being second

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  • Ashley
    VIP August 2020 Ontario
    Ashley ·
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    Pick none! you dont need a MOH and you can assign them both tasks. but it seems like your friend is goig above and beyond already when your sister hasnt done much....

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  • Rayanne
    Master June 2022 Ontario
    Rayanne ·
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    I'm not having either of my sister's in my wedding party. I'm closer to one than the other and rather than have hurt feelings I chose to have only one MOH. You have to do what works for you. If 2 MOH works go for it.
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  • Tori
    Top October 2019 Manitoba
    Tori ·
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    I would say to have 2 MOH's!! I will only be having one (my sister), but my FH is having 2 Best men and so far the only speed bump is basically deciding who will stand directly next to my FH and who will sign the legal papers.

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  • Miav
    Devoted September 2020 Alberta
    Miav ·
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    2 maid of honours sounds fun! I agree on all the previous suggestions 😄
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  • Tamara
    Frequent user July 2019 Nova Scotia
    Tamara ·
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    I would have both. My husband didn't even pick a best man for our ceremony. He just had three groomsmen and each one picked something different to do. One signed the marriage licence, one planned the bachelor party, and the other made the speech at the reception. You cold do the same with your girls. One to sign, one to speak, and they can both plan any parties or showers they want to throw you.

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  • Michelle
    Expert October 2021 Nova Scotia
    Michelle ·
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    I've been to weddings where there are two MOHs, and personally I am having two "of Honour"s

    I think if you can't pick why not have both?

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  • Amanda
    Super June 2019 Ontario
    Amanda ·
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    You can definitely have 2... or your friend can be MOH and your sister can still be a bridesmaid. It's a hard decision, but you need to pick based on what you want, no one else.

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  • Casey
    Master October 2019 Ontario
    Casey ·
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    You can for sure do 2 MOH’s, it is your wedding you make the rules lol!
    When my sister got married I was a bridesmaid, and not even the one beside the MOH. If you have other people you are closer to or that you want, then go for it!
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  • Hélène
    Devoted September 2019 Alberta
    Hélène ·
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    Congratulations on your engagement!

    It sounds like your best friend is MOH in your heart. Your sister doesn't get to claim that title by virtue of being your sister. For me, I would go with who you'd pick up the phone and call first if things are going sideways in your life and your marriage and who would support you through the rough patches. It sounds like that's your best friend. I'd sit down and explain to your sister that you're honoured having her standing with you, but that your best friend holds that honour position in the wedding party..and why.

    If you still ultimately can't decide, I did have two friends who were 'honour attendants' at my first wedding. It wasn't too much of an issue as we all lived in different cities so not much pre-wedding stuff was required. (My MIL & SIL hosted my shower and we didn't do a bachelorette.)

    Good luck with it!

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  • A
    Super September 2020 Ontario
    Amelia ·
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    I'm having my two sisters as co-MOHs. One of them is local and will be of more help leading up the wedding while the other lives in Calgary so I'll give her more responsibilities the day of. If your friend and sister will be comfortable sharing the duties and you're happy to have two, I say go for it - especially if it will save you some drama! Otherwise, go with your gut and choose the one who will be your 'person' and just explain to the other that they've been more of a rock to you. My FH chose his best friend as his best man over his brother and it hasn't caused any problems - but maybe that's just because they're guys lol.

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  • Chelsea
    Super June 2020 Alberta
    Chelsea ·
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    I have two MOHs and neither of them is my sister! my sister is a bridesmaid, and although we are close and get along great, we’re not each other’s “person”, ie. she’s not the one i would call in a crisis. she understood and was happy to just be a bridesmaid! when she gets married someday i’m sure i will be a bridemaid and not MOH then as well, which works out great!

    I chose two MOH as one of my girls is living in Australia and it would be too much for her to do the MOH things from that far away! Having two has been AMAZING! they both knew that they both have the title, and that i wanted them to work together and everyone is happy!
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