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Hank
Featured September 2021 Ontario

Wedding Superstitions

Hank, on September 19, 2022 at 11:54 Posted in Before the wedding 0 24
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A lot of wedding traditions are not based on any formality but rather a set of silly superstitions. What things are you keeping in the wedding due to superstition and what are you skipping?

- Not seeing the bride prior to the wedding: I personally skipped this. Our wedding started at 5pm - that's a long time of not seeing my partner on a day meant to celebrate us. Plus, I know a lot of couples who opt for a first look nowadays.

- Wearing white to signify purity: My wife wore an off-white dress and it looked awesome! She also wore a red dress throughout parts of the event. Plenty of cultures don't use white as their traditional wedding garb. And the whole reason white was started in the first place was because the queen wore it and it somehow got co-opted into this purity nonsense.

- Getting married in unlucky months: Some Catholics don't like getting married in May due to Lent. Chinese and Indian couples may look at auspicious and non-auspicious dates for their wedding. Did you pick or avoid a date based on superstition? We sort of did this to appease parents from freaking out but we set a limit lol. If my mom had it her way, we would've gotten married on a weeknight in February or something Smiley xd

- Not allowing guests to wear black at your wedding: It's supposed to be a colour for mourning but we didn't care. For our wedding a few guests wore little black dresses that looked amazing on them.

Wedding Superstitions 1

24 Comments

Latest activity by Jenn, on September 22, 2022 at 11:50
  • Jenn
    Devoted August 2023 Ontario
    Jenn ·
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    The getting ready was also a factor on our end!

    Haha I am not musically inclined on the instrument front, but I may ask one of our groomsmen to help on the music front (as he is a singer and guitarist)

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  • Hank
    Featured September 2021 Ontario
    Hank ·
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    My wife and I didn't stay together the night before as well because it was easier for both of us to get ready separately. Had to drive two cars just to lug all the stuff over.

    Are you busting out the guitar as well? Smiley smile

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  • Jenn
    Devoted August 2023 Ontario
    Jenn ·
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    We will not be staying together the night before the wedding, but since we have lived together for a while now, we are okay with it.

    We don't know if we are doing a "first look" or not yet, but I kind of hope it's what he opts for, as I am going to sing I Choose You by Sara Bareilles (he obviously doesn't know), and I think that is the best time to do it..otherwise, not sure when it would make sense!!

    I am leaning towards NOT doing the garter or the bouquet toss, but am doing the something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue

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  • KELLY
    Featured October 2023 Ontario
    KELLY ·
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    Yes exactly
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  • Hank
    Featured September 2021 Ontario
    Hank ·
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    That's awesome! Were there any debates on his choices vs yours? Smiley xd

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  • Carling
    Newbie November 2023 Ontario
    Carling ·
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    My partner actually came to a dress shopping appointment and was there when I chose my dress! I wholeheartedly agree that tradition can be nice, but shouldn’t dictate your whole wedding (or life). Having him there was great because he has excellent taste in clothes and he makes me feel beautiful; and besides, it’s the magic of the wedding day that makes seeing the bride special, not the dress itself. (He’s usually more enthusiastic but I caught him off guard here 😅)Wedding Superstitions 2

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  • Brittany
    Featured August 2023 Alberta
    Brittany ·
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    Wow, it is so interesting to hear about different traditions for different cultures. Its fascinating really. I am trying to pin down which culture the one I found goes with.

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  • Hank
    Featured September 2021 Ontario
    Hank ·
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    Something like this.

    Wedding Superstitions 3

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  • Hank
    Featured September 2021 Ontario
    Hank ·
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    Another option if the weather is nice is to find a corner of the building so that you can be outdoors. As long as each of you stay on your side of the wall outside and only stretch out your hands toward the edge, you can still get a photo together while preserving the surprise for him. It's also easier for the photographer because it's less constricted.

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  • KELLY
    Featured October 2023 Ontario
    KELLY ·
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    That is so sweet Hank, I agreed to it because he hasn't asked for anything during the entire planning process. There is a chance I will convince him to take one of those pictures where we are on opposite sides of the door...

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  • Hank
    Featured September 2021 Ontario
    Hank ·
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    That's a sweet gesture.

    I also didn't do a sneak peek of my wife in her dress not for any tradition's sake but because I really wanted that genuine look of surprise as she walked down the aisle.

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  • KELLY
    Featured October 2023 Ontario
    KELLY ·
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    Hi Hank,

    My FH doesn't want a sneak peek because its "tradition" and I am doing the other because it's not common to wear coloured jewellry. I had fun playing with my mothers jewelry as a child so I am incorporating it into my wedding. It will be like she's walking with the down the aisle with me as I had always planned...

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  • Hank
    Featured September 2021 Ontario
    Hank ·
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    In a Chinese wedding, a guest wearing a red dress is synonymous with a guest wearing a white dress at a wedding. It implies you're trying to show up the bride and groom or steal their good fortunes because the red colour is heavily factored in a Chinese wedding and primarily used as a good luck colour for the couple.

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  • Hank
    Featured September 2021 Ontario
    Hank ·
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    I guess it really speaks to the power of wedding industry marketing if they turned the unluckiest day to get married into the most in-demand day for weddings.

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  • Hank
    Featured September 2021 Ontario
    Hank ·
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    Are you doing the two traditions for the luck aspect or just because it's fun to do? Cuz let's face it, blue is a nice colour to incorporate, superstition or not.

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  • Brittany
    Featured August 2023 Alberta
    Brittany ·
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    My fiancé and I aren't really superstitious people so I really don't have any rules that I expect the guests to follow. But going off on wearing black to a wedding - did anyone know that in some cultures/regions that wearing red to the wedding means she slept with the groom? I just saw this last night on someone's Reddit post and it blew me away. HAD NO IDEA

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  • Hank
    Featured September 2021 Ontario
    Hank ·
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    I also said no to the first look, not due to superstition but because I wanted to be genuinely surprised as she walked down the aisle.

    And yeah, religion tends to play a big part in some of these superstitions, especially the western ones. The something blue thing apparently was to ward off evil spirits that would make the bride infertile? lol

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  • Hank
    Featured September 2021 Ontario
    Hank ·
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    Yeah, the Chinese calendar has a lot of crazy rules. Weddings on certain dates mean better luck for the marriage. You can only move in on certain dates. You can only have funerals on certain dates. There are even dates for birth, which has prompted a lot of people in China to have scheduled c-sections just so their child can be born on a "good day."

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  • Malyssa
    Featured October 2022 Alberta
    Malyssa ·
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    Well I broke the "not wearing black to a wedding as a guest", didn't even ask the couple if it was okay. I only went for black, as I primarily wear black pretty much all the time (hell people were shocked I didnt go for a black wedding dress thats how much I wear black) so I think thats a silly superstition. We don't even care what people where to our wedding. We opted for a very chill dress code, more so just let people know that they will have their photo taken, so dress as they'd like, and dress for the weather haha

    We are defineitly not following suit in some of these: we are doing first looks, as we have a later ceremony and having a fall wedding, want as much natural sunlight for photos as possible. Although we will be following the "spending the night apart" one - as we've lived together for the past 7 years, spend nearly every moment together, I dont mind spending one night apart.

    some others I have seen:

    Apparently, in english folklore, getting married on a Saturday is bad luck! WHO KNEW?! and seeing as most people go with a Saturday date, I dont think most of us follow this lore.

    Veils have alot of different lore, from keeping away evil spirits, or keeping the brides appearance a secret til the last moment (more so in arranged marriage cultures) but I opted for no veil at all. not for any superstitious reasons, more so its just not my vibe.

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  • L
    Featured May 2022 Alberta
    Liberty ·
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    My husband and I spent the night together before the wedding and did a first look so we were actually only apart for like 4 hours while I was getting ready. My dress was nude/ivory. I'd say we didn't even really think about superstitions. Just did what we wanted!
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  • KELLY
    Featured October 2023 Ontario
    KELLY ·
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    I didn't have a specific colour in mind when I went looking for my dress; the one I fell in love with happened to be white. Two traditions we are going with is my FH not seeing me prior to the wedding, and the old, new, borrowed and blue.

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  • Carine
    Featured September 2023 Ontario
    Carine ·
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    I did not know there were days that are considered superstitious, Only superstition I follow is, broken mirror, opening an umbrella in a house and walking under a ladder, seeing the bride on the day of the wedding.

    I did not know there's days that are considered superstitious. We just picked the date that was available for 2023 at our venue.

    We are not doing a garter toss but just the bouquet toss.

    My dress is Ivory with mauve underneath it, I was not a fan of the pure white look on me and I am not doing a veil, Trying both on they reminded me of the meaning of wearing white and a veil and it felt wrong, might be something that my religion passed on to me even though I do not follow my religion.

    I love the first look idea but prefer him to see me walk down the aisle first. I will do a first look with my dad to give him that extra moment.

    I am ok with anyone wearing black or a white dress as long as it has a pattern on it. It would be weird for them to show up all white, but if it's a white floral dress or white polka dot, then I have no problem with that.

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  • Julie
    Featured May 2023 Ontario
    Julie ·
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    Not wearing white. My dress is ivory/gold

    Didn't know about the unlucky dates/months - wasn't too picky when it came to the date

    Not seeing the bride - I asked FH and he was for it. Said he'd rather keep that tradition - which surprised the hell out of me LOL

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  • Amanda
    Featured August 2022 British Columbia
    Amanda ·
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    I skipped the wearing white color. My wedding dress was ivory/light gold

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