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Tyanna
Super June 2019 British Columbia

Vows

Tyanna, on December 11, 2018 at 02:04 Posted in Wedding ceremony 0 19
My whole life I've been what my mother likes to call "an emotionless rock" because I'm just not much of a crier (😂). That being said, I'm probably going to cry like a little baby during the ceremony and during our vows. I'm a pretty private person as is, but not really with my FH.


We have pretty much decided that we will read standard vows during the ceremony in front of everyone, but we will each write our own and give them to the other person to read, or find time to read them to each other at some point.

I'm not really sure when the best time would be. Please help us with the following options and which you think would be best, or if you have a better idea please let me know Smiley smile

1) give vows to each other at rehearsal dinner. Read before bed that night. (We will be staying with our wedding party, separately and wont see each other)

2) sneak away between rehearsal dinner and going to our cabins to read them to each other

3) meet up in the morning and read them to each other (we would have to see each other, obviously)

4) our photographer wants sunset pictures, so we read them then and risk me ugly crying on film, but have a romantic setting with just us, and we don't have to say loud vows before the wedding.

19 Comments

Latest activity by Brittany, on December 12, 2018 at 16:55
  • Brittany
    British Columbia
    Brittany ·
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    As much as I love a good ugly cry... I think if it were me, it would be #1. I'll be doing something similar. I received a series of cards in one of my bridal subscription boxes, they have mushy love sayings on the front, and then blank inside. It came with 6, so I've given my FH love notes on "4 Months to the Big Day", "3 Months", "2 Months"... He'll be getting 1 month next week, then a "night before" and a "day of". So he'll get vow-type love notes both the night before (maybe with me there), and one in the morning, while he's getting ready.

    We're also doing a Wine Box ceremony, so we'll have vow/love notes for each other, but they'll be stored away for us to read on our first anniversary.

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  • Chelsea
    Super June 2020 Alberta
    Chelsea ·
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    Were doing the same thing! we’re planning on getting our photographer to capture us reading the vows separately, before the ceremony while we’re getting ready
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  • Hélène
    Devoted September 2019 Alberta
    Hélène ·
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    Although 4 is my favourite, I've seen some cool shots of couples reading vows before the ceremony on either side of a door or corner so you can hear each other and hold hands if you want, but not see each other.

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  • Stephanie
    VIP May 2019 Ontario
    Stephanie ·
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    Yes I agree!! Also a lot of the things I want to say in them contain a lot of inside jokes or secrets so others really wouldn't understand!
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  • Allison
    Master October 2019 Ontario
    Allison ·
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    I'm thinking about that too! We might do standard vows at the ceremony and then read more personal ones alone with our photographer after the ceremony.

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  • Rachael
    Super October 2019 Ontario
    Rachael ·
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    I agree with the former!

    I'm contemplating my fiancé and I reading our vows privately too and having standard ones for our ceremony as I'm a private person and they seem too personal. The thought of reading them aloud seems forced and corny to me.

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  • Allison
    Master October 2019 Ontario
    Allison ·
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    I love the idea of getting photos captured with the vows! Those are my must-have shots even though I'm guaranteed to ugly cry.

    I'm the exact opposite of you and cry at every single wedding/anything sad or happy lol but you will get candid shots of you and your (new!) husband sharing a intimate moment.

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  • Jennifer
    Super July 2019 Ontario
    Jennifer ·
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    I love love love the idea of #4. get some of the posed photos with sunset first. and then read the vows.

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  • C
    Beginner August 2019 Alberta
    Charissa ·
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    Do it either 4 or 1 before bed. If you're looking for a beautiful, intimate moment i think those would be best. Maybe get a few pictures in before reading if you're worried about crying lol
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  • Peggy
    Super May 2019 Alberta
    Peggy ·
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    I would chose the sunset pictures - after some lovely posed pictures, do your readings. There will be something special about the pictures of the vows. It's like a reverse-first look!

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  • Tyanna
    Super June 2019 British Columbia
    Tyanna ·
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    Steal away! I've always felt strongly that during the ceremony I'm already making vows to commit myself to him and that its not really anyones business to hear our actual vows hahah
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  • Tyanna
    Super June 2019 British Columbia
    Tyanna ·
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    If I can get rid of my double Chin by then I am okay with ugly cey photos 🤞🏼😂
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  • Tyanna
    Super June 2019 British Columbia
    Tyanna ·
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    We are not doing a first look. I like the idea of doin it during the photos, but not about having to read them in front of anyone, lol! I've known my photographer since elementary school which is both a blessing and a curse when it comes to that! I am leaning towards option 4 though
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  • Robyn
    Super June 2019 Ontario
    Robyn ·
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    Option number 4!!! Get those ugly cries on camera, that's the good stuff!

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  • Casey
    Master October 2019 Ontario
    Casey ·
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    I agree with #4! That would be amazing to have a beautiful background, and then a little bit of alone time with each other.

    You could also give them to each other at the rehearsal dinner and read them alone the morning of your wedding.

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  • Stephanie
    VIP May 2019 Ontario
    Stephanie ·
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    We are doing the same!!! We are getting married in a catholic church so we get to choose some of the readings and passages but we cannot fully customize our own vows! I love the idea of doing it after the rehearsal!! I am going to steal that idea hahah!! But omg letting each other read them after you've left or to each other that's a hard choice.... I'll cry so much with either hahah!! But I vote do it the day before somehow! Just thinking about doing the vows then gets me more excited about the actual wedding haha!
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  • Tori
    Top October 2019 Manitoba
    Tori ·
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    I like option number 4! Get some pictures before you read them - but being able to see your true emotion in pictures would make them your favourite for sure! (If not you can later laugh at your ugly cries Smiley tongue )

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  • Maegan
    Super July 2018 British Columbia
    Maegan ·
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    #4! Having that moment caught on film is priceless. I ugly cry but my favorite pictures from the whole day are from reading our vows to each other. I tear up every time I look at those photos because it just captured so much emotion.

    Also so I think sunset photos would just be nice timing. The nerves will be gone by that point and you can just relax and enjoy the moment. It would be so romantic!
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  • Leah
    VIP April 2019 British Columbia
    Leah ·
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    I love the idea of private vows.

    I think options 3 and 4 are divine times to do it. I know you’re worried about ugly crying on film but imho candid raw photos are the better than posed photos so you may appreciate having it captured.

    Alternatively - are you having a first look? Could you read the vows to each other then?

    Please let us know what you decide!
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