I've definitely ranted about this before, but things I felt have taken a turn for the worst.
ICYMI, at the start of September, my MOH started her last semester of university and it's going more stressful than planned. Over the course of those weeks, she had feeling of being "cursed" - always something going wrong. It's seriously affected her mental health at this point.
We're no longer able to road trip together. She told me she feels like she's just gonna burn out and needs more time with her family to get back on track. My mom is gonna road trip with me, so no one was SOL.
The last week really hit her hard. She's had many breakdowns about how she's not where she wants to be in life but she's so close to start achieving these goals. (i.e. finish school, get a job, find a girlfriend). I feel like my wedding is also impacting her, like it's a reminder that she's single (also, she doesn't want to burden me with her problems right now - but as her friend I'm gonna be there for her anyways). She had a similar breakdown a few years ago but made lots of progress with herself so any minor setback feels like 2 giant steps backwards.
She did do (mental health) counselling those years ago but she found it didn't really help out. I also did some counselling during university (they provide it until the health and wellness plan) and it helped me lots. I feel like if she went again, maybe see a different counselor, it could help.
I feel terrible that her fear of being a burden kinda feels true right now, but I also know she isn't maliciously having a mental breakdown 3 weeks before my wedding. Her way of coping is to ignore the world, so I feel bad when I ask her about wedding stuff, especially if it's triggering her. One of the bridesmaids knows her well and can definitely relate to her more (recently laid off, single) but I'm physically closer to her right now and feel like her primary support system.
I also feel like it might be best to offer her an out, (let her step down) but she has her dress, shoes, etc. but she wouldn't have to worry about any wedding party stuff. If I offer her the choice to step-down, I fear that she might not come to the wedding at all. I also don't want this to impact our friendship, but I feel like it already has. I didn't want anyone to be stressed about being in the wedding party nor have the wedding impact any of my friendships, but I feel like she needs me more but I have a few weeks until the wedding. I also didn't want to be that bridezilla that put their wedding ahead of their friends.
I really needed to get this off my chest, we've been friends for years but it feels like this is a real turning point that could make or break it.
