sos Bridesmaid!

Maybe you can talk to her and explain what do you expect form your wedding party, after that give the opportunity for them to step down or to put some effort.

I know its a hard decision and I am going through this myself.

Its hard!!!

This situation just happened to me... except reversed.... One of my long time friends asked me to be a bridesmaid and i was thrilled !!!!!!!! .. around the same time i ended up getting engaged too! She confronted me that i wasn't putting enough effort in and told me to forget being in her wedding party. That hurt a lot because we were friends for 10 plus years. Don't do what my friend did. Ask her nicely, maybe she has a lot going on. Or maybe she needs guidance on how she can help you out !

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Thank you for your input!
I would leave that part out as well. Just going to sit her down and ask her if she is still comfortable with being a bridesmaid or if she prefers to sit it out. I am hoping it is all just a misunderstanding!

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Possibly but she is in a relationship herself that is doing well... I hope that it is all just a misunderstanding

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That's unfortunate. I wonder why she is bitter? Could it be jealousy?

I agree with the other brides, but when talking to her I'd leave out the part about wanting people who are excited and appreciative of the position. IMO, that would be a bit rude, like she has no right to be feeling a bit off. I mean, I'm sure she's excited about being part of it all, but she might be going through something and doesn't know how to talk to you about it or doesn't want to stress you out.

I'm sure she'll be grateful you took the time to listen - that's what friends are for!

View quoted message Thank you for your input Gordon! I'm going to take Daphne's advice and talk with her. See how she feels about the situation

View quoted message Hi daphne!Thanks for the advice! I think this is what I will do. No beating around the bush just straight to the point! This way everyone is on the same page

View quoted message Hi Sonja Thank you for your input. I think I'm going to sit her down and ask her if she wants to be part of the day. She's seemed a little bitter about the situation from when I got engaged and I just want someone to want the part!

View quoted message Hi Ashley Thank you for your input. I haven't asked my bridesmaids to do much yet. She's just giving a vibe that she's not into it. Whenever I've talked about the wedding she's been pretty bitter towards the whole situation and I just want someone to want to be apart of my day.

I think I would ask her if she could take on an important job. Maybe she just needs to know she is needed and that being a bridesmaid comes with responsibility. If she is touchy about things, the direct approach may not be the best. Plus we have to remember that not everyone is excited about our wedding as we are.

I don't think it's fair to put such high expectations on the wedding party. If they seem uninterested, often they just need direction or a task to focus on. Realistically, life is busy enough for people. With our wedding, if I need assistance or opinions, I'll ask. We made it clear to our wedding party that we want them to just chill, enjoy the journey with us and the wedding day as well.

I agree with everyone here that a calm and frank conversation is the only way to go.

I agree with Daphne and just sit her down and ask her honestly. I purposely chose friends that have shown excitement once I got engaged and I waited a month before asking any of my bridesmaids. Not only is this a journey for you and your fiance, but for you and your bridesmaids too. It's a chance to make memories and you are not wrong if you want someone to show some more enthusiasm for that special day.

I would just sit her down and flat out ask her if she's happy/ok with being a bridesmaid because you're getting the vibe from her that she doesn't want the responsibility and that it's ok to say that she doesn't want to be in the wedding party.

You say your friend is very touchy about things, so there likely isn't any good way to broach the topic with her, so a calm conversation letting her know she can back out, for whatever reason, is a-ok with you. Then go from there.