Sharing a Bachelorette Party…

Oh that would not sit well with me! I would tell her straight up no I don't want to share my day with someone else! Don't beat around the bush tell her how you feel!

That is obscured...I personally wouldn't want to share my bachlorette with someone else either, even if this person was a good friend of mine. Just simply tell her no...she should be understanding!

Maybe it was just a random thought she had in her head that after she thought about it she kind of felt like it wasn't the best. You would think anyway. Hope your talk goes well. I'm sure just letting her know that it wouldn't work for you, she'll understand. The other person might not want to share her day with you either 😆

View quoted message Right? I couldn’t believe it either! I was so shocked like I didn’t even know what to say and all I wanted to do was cry lol.

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That's really the only way she's going to know lol and btw I can't believe she would even ask you to do a joined party I would totally be like ummmm ya no lol

View quoted message Oh gosh! That was like this one bachelorette someone planned it was so much money as a bridesmaid that I was like ummm this is a bit much (I did it because I was in the wedding party but even I was like why?). My fiancé is the no type lol I always want to please people but I obviously have to learn to not say yes to things for my wedding. I also have to stick up for myself I have a feeling this bridesmaid may be a bit much for me to handle! Yeah I feel like bachelorette parties should be on the cheaper side. Most of my bridesmaids have kids and don’t have a ton of money so o legit don’t want it to be too much on them and within everyone’s budget! And thanks ugh I’m dreading it already lol

View quoted message I’m going to ask her why she wants to have them shared and just tell her that we should have our own parties to make us feel special and have the people we want there. And I get that it would be easier but 3 of the bridesmaids don’t really know her that well so it’s like it would be weird for them 🤷🏻‍♀️ I’m just going to be honest but very polite about it

View quoted message Oh I get it! So it's kind of like the bride that's already married didn't get a bachelorette because of covid, or something, so she's wanting to make up for it kind of thing? That's actually really sweet, but it definitely doesn't have to be some crazy all out party where you're doing dozens of things that adds up to hundreds or thousands of dollars. So yeah, definitely tell her that, because as a thoughtful friend they might think that's what you expect of them, and in a lot of cases that's not everyone's mindset. My MOH wanted to do like 6 different things in one night and I'm like "uh no. I appreciate all the thought that went into all of that, but I want a chill night with my girls with just 1 or 2 of the things you picked out." She literally had an itinerary written out down to the minute (because she's type A😂) and it just wasn't what I wanted and not within everyone else's budget either.
So yeah, honesty is the best policy and while planning my wedding was actually the time where I stopped being a chronic "yes" person and learned to say no when I felt I needed to. Valuable life lesson there lol but good luck! 🤞

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Yeah seems weird. I would talk to her and ask why she feels the need to have combined parties? It could be a financial thing or could be she genuinely thought that since everyone knows each other that it would be easier to do one party.

View quoted message Oh I was off put when she asked me I legit wanted to cry. I and a very generous person but with wedding stuff I’m with you it’s a hell no I am not sharing anything. For me I would like some aspects a surprise but my fiancé already said he would be happy to let us have the beginning part at our place and he would make us appetizers and my brother said he would be one of the DDs like there is so many ways to make it affordable if that is the case! She may have to miss mine if that is the case which I am okay with! Because she was the MOH for the other bridesmaids. I also don’t even know if the one she wants me to share with is wanting one since she is already married 🤷🏻‍♀️ I am hanging out with the bridesmaid (who wants me to share) on Thursday and I’m going to discuss it with her and just be very nice about it. This is the first time she’s done anything like this to me but it definitely is going to be the last!

Ok, this bothers me. I'm a very sharing and generous person by nature, but that's with things like food or sharing alcohol that I brought to a get together or my clothes, etc. But events having to do with my wedding?? Not a chance! The fact that she even asked is odd and off putting. Does the other bride know about this shared bachelorette request yet? I'm with Brittany in that it sounds like she's trying to save some money by combining potentially 2 events into 1. If that's the case then she needs to plan accordingly and if that means having to miss 1 for the other then that's just how it has to be, as unfortunate as that may be. But that's part of the responsibility in accepting to be in a wedding party, so I just think she may not have thought through being in 2 parties thoroughly enough.
Whatever the case may be, you should be truthful with her and she should be just as truthful with you if it is a money issue so she can work with your other bridesmaids (and you, if it doesn't have to be a surprise) to make it a fun night while also making it work for everyone's budget.

View quoted message So I love both of the girls I’ve known them both for a long time like 20 years or so so I do like them both. Just I feel the same way that the bridesmaid is trying to save money and I get it but like I don’t expect anything elaborate for my bachelorette party! I just wanna have fun! We could do the other bridesmaids( who just got married) bachelorette this year and do mine next summer or next September! Their cousin is getting engaged so now I’m worried to save they are gonna want me to share something else and it’s just like no I would NEVER ask someone to share any part of their day including the bachelorette, stag and doe or bridal shower 🤷🏻‍♀️

View quoted message Thanks girl! I’m gonna do that! I am hanging out with her Thursday so I’m gonna just politely tell her no to sharing it

GIRLLL this is celebrations for YOUR WEDDING DAY. Do not conform to anything you don't want to do. The fact that she would ask is weird? Is she concerned she won't be able to afford both parties? If that's the case she needs to be honest with you and be able to budget the two parties or not go to one. I find that weird. Especially since it seems that you do not like the other person that much, so I assume that this is not something the other girl planned or has brought up and the bridesmaid is asking to make it easier on herself.

Don't beat around the bush. Just tell her the truth that you don't want to share your bachelorette party with someone else. You want to have your own night.