Overwhelmed and a bit Deflated

Thanks Ladies! I ordered my ring off amazon, decided that the Mothers attire has no effect on me! The best man's Tux isn't my problem either - he know he has to wear one and sizing is his issue! Where people stay - once again isn't my issue!

Thanks for all your support! This is the best webste for weddings!!

Vent away!! I'm sorry people are throwing so much negativity your way Candice!

I would definitely take a deep breath and let it go. As the previous posters have said - people will always complain about something, just to complain!

Ok so I completely understand your feeling frustrated but I think with a few of these you need to try and just let it go as best you can and move past it.

People are always going to have something negative to say (especially around how you choose to parent) so just try to ignore it. Also, I would let the mom's wear what they are comfortable in. If for one that's a pant suit then let her wear a pant suit. Offer to go with her to help pick one out that makes both of you happy. If a new dress isn't in the budget for the other Mom you may need to be willing to help pay for it if your set on it needing to be a new one.


For hotels if they have a problem provide them a list of other hotel options in the area and let them know your block is at abc hotel but if they would like to stay somewhere else these are the other options in the area.


Get your fiancés help to get on the groomsman about his suit. It should really be him putting the pressure on his party members and help back you up on this.

I would not try to force my fiancé to spend $700 on my wedding band. If I'm the one picking it I better be willing to pay for it myself. If he set a budget of $60 then I would either accept that $60 towards it or just each pay for your own rings and then take cost right out of the equation. This is what we did because we both felt strongly about picking our own rings to be our own symbol of our commitment. I wasn't expecting him to spend another $1000 just because it's the ring I want when his was only $200.

MIL wanting different meal: your rehearsal - your choice. Stand your ground or offer to let her have a separate meal compared to everybody else give that that choice is equal or less money.

Parenting - you will probably run into this regardless of a wedding. Everybody has an opinion so unfortunately it's one of those things that you have to turn the other cheek about unless they start interfering with your kids and how they perceive you.

Mothers and outfits - I would allow one to wear a pant suit but that just may be me. I would have her wear the colour I chose so that it matches how I invision the day but if she wants to wear a pant suit then I would be fine with that. As for the other one wanting to wear one of her dresses that she already owns; I understand that you may not want to shell out more money than you already have but it's your kids wedding.... c'mon, dresses are as low as $100 or less if second hand.

Hotel - why? What the heck? Are people off their rockers? Just because you get a hotel block at a certain hotel doesn't mean that they have to go to that said hotel. Surely people can't be that upset about this?

Best man - ya... I feel ya on this one. We aren't that far into the wedding planning just yet but I can tell that our two best men will probably be like this... Not much you can do other than get your FH to go to his best man and tell him what's what.

Fiancé $$ - I know that it will work out in the end, I am in the same boat but my FH is in debt from school and whatnot so I understand that he is doing the best that he can while trying to resolve his debt issue. As long as you have a talk with your FH before the wedding and make a plan as to how you will both be contributing financially from then on you should be fine. Still a bit frustrating though.

I know you were just venting and not looking too much for solutions so I hope this long reply wasn't too long. I was pretending that we were having a heart to heart and read each point and responded how I would had you been talking to me in person.

Hope everything works itself out!!

It's so disappointing when people can't keep their negativity to themselves. Everything will surely come together in the end, but you need to put people in their place and tell them to stop dragging their feet (the moms should dress appropriately and the best man has to go get fitted ASAP!). As for your FH not contributing financially, that's a big issue. Is there a reason why he's so reluctant to help? It's not fair of him to put all the pressure on you, but is he promising to pay you back after the fact for the wedding?

That's a lot of negativity before the big day. I'm so sorry you have to deal with this .

I can't believe your finace hasnt contributed financially as of yet. That's nuts (but you go girl for doing it all yourself up until this point!).