My church does not fit the guests we wish to invited. Solutions?

I would keep the numbers in the church small, maybe immediate family only, and I like the option of having a livestreamed overflow option.


The more exclusive you make the list of people in the church the easier it will be to explain to anyone who asks why they aren't on that list. We did this with our whole wedding this year and it was so much easier to tell my aunts and uncles that "because not all of our immediate family can be there we are only having our wedding party and immediate family attend" (I had an uncle who was quite upset until my mom explained that my husband's parents weren't there so it wasn't fair to have a huge party without them).

I think I would go with just family for ceremony. I'm sure people would understand if a church had sentimental attachment for you and there just wasn't enough room. I would go to a reception if I was not able to go to the ceremony.

The church capacity should be the guest list invited than what your planning to do for the other guests not present. The reception can have the rest of the uninvited guests present there for the celebrations. You do have the right idea of live streaming though its not the same as being present in the room itself. Its best to ask your videographer about setting up zoom for your guests at home to watch the ceremony.

View quoted message Agreed. I know I’m in the minority but I don’t find other people’s ceremonies all that exciting lol. If I knew I wasn’t even in the same room as the couple but I still had to travel to a location I probably wouldn’t go. The exception to this would be a zoom wedding or something where I can’t attend due to the pandemic or other extraordinary situations.

What I mean by that, is you might invite 150, but a lot of those people won’t attend the ceremony. That being said, it’s absolutely not a guarantee. I personally wouldn’t want to attend the ceremony if I was asked to sit next door and watch the live stream. So, you might have to cut your guest list down to 100.

To be honest, more people don’t go to the ceremony if it’s at a separate location...

I third the idea of trying to keep it under 100 people. If you're using a videographer with day-of-edit services, show a ceremony highlight at the reception instead.

I agree that I would just try to keep it under 100 if I wasn't willing to compromise on the venue.

But if you absolutely can't, I would do a family only ceremony - no exceptions - and then have the full guest list for the reception. If you explain it's due to venue capacity and it's family only I think friends will understand. But you have to be firm in that distinction and not make any exceptions if you don't want much backlash.

Or I guess you could do what you suggested. People probably won't be happy about it but it's your wedding so do you.

I think your options are kind of limited if you are dead set on getting married there. Are you planning on using the hall next door for the reception? I personally think it's a little tacky if I had to go next door and watch the wedding from a livestream there, but that's my thought.

If you could get the guest count under 100, that would probably be best.