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Jessica
Beginner August 2018 Ontario

Inviting people in the workplace

Jessica, on February 21, 2017 at 15:22 Posted in Wedding reception 0 22

I work in a small office, about 20 people. However, I don't want to invite EVERYONE to my wedding. Is it rude to only invite some people?

There are just some people I've only ever had small talk with, or people I just don't vibe with and wouldn't want at my wedding. Some people tell me I should invite everyone in the office, but I'm trying to cut down the amount of guests to the most closest. So am I doing the right thing by only inviting those in my office I would want there?

22 Comments

Latest activity by Natasha, on February 22, 2017 at 11:35
  • Natasha
    VIP August 2017 Ontario
    Natasha ·
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    exactly and they all need to respect your decision because I am sure if the tables were turned you probably would not be invited to their wedding ... lol

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  • Jessica
    Beginner August 2018 Ontario
    Jessica ·
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    I agree, thanks so much! I've narrowed the numbers down. I definitely don't want someone there that I wouldn't even want to talk to very much at work!

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  • Natasha
    VIP August 2017 Ontario
    Natasha ·
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    I am only inviting a select few from my office that I am close with and actually have spent time with outside of the office, its your day do what is going to make you happy !

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  • Simone
    Master August 2017 Manitoba
    Simone ·
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    I feel that this is at your discretion as we are only inviting a select few to our wedding. The I need we invited are based on close we are on a personal level.
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  • Stephanie
    Devoted June 2021 Ontario
    Stephanie ·
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    I work in a call centre, so no way am inviting 200+ people, lmao. Just like others have said, I'm only inviting those I socialize with outside of work.
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  • Katherine
    Super September 2017 New Brunswick
    Katherine ·
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    Our co-workers didn't survive the first guest list cut... Except for his boss we don't socialize with any of them outside of work.
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  • Cynthia
    Curious August 2017 Ontario
    Cynthia ·
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    I'm in the same boat! I'd love for the majority of the ladies in my office to attend the wedding but there are some that I'd be...Indifferent. An option I was considering was just inviting them to the dancing part of the reception (not dinner). We're big on dancing so I think it will be a good option!
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  • Kacy
    VIP February 2019 Quebec
    Kacy ·
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    Amazing, I'm going to use this for sure!! Smiley winking
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  • Valerie
    VIP April 2017 Ontario
    Valerie ·
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    Personal version... "so weddings coming up, you must be excited! Have you picked a venue? " "oh yes, very excited! Ya, a winery out by Niagara. omg did you see the newest episode of [show you both watch]? I CAN'T BELIEVE THEY KILLED [beloved character]!!!! And OMG I binged that new Netflix series on thw weekend... you need to watch!!" BOOM! Distractions!!!!! HAHA I use TV to avoid so many uncomfortable topics! And it's the easiest segue because no one thinks its weird when you randomly talk about tv all excitedly (or at least not me because I do it all the time)

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  • L
    Expert August 2018 Ontario
    Linzer ·
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    So, I'm a terrible person and inviting essentially half my floor at work but not the other half. I'm really close with most of them, but some of the girls haven't really made an effort to befriend me beyond a superficial level . I try to minimize the wedding talk in front of them, but we're a smaller office and we all talk a lot. I think that some feelings may get hurt but the reality is I can't have EVERYONE there (I'm only having 75 guests total).
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  • Chelsea
    Master August 2017 Ontario
    Chelsea ·
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    I am only inviting 3 staff from where I work right now and then 4 previous workers. My work has a lot of new people so they don't expect to be invited when I barely know them. Also my work is all girls except for 1, and so it is all clicks and drama anyways and so for me I wouldn't want to bring that to my wedding or have my job be awkward when I go back! I see these people often but I mailed my invitations to them just so nobody was upset by this even though everyone there knows about my wedding as they do like to ask about it!
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  • Kacy
    VIP February 2019 Quebec
    Kacy ·
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    LOL that was PERFECTION! I am good at this 'art' for my job, with my patients... but in personal life, ddayyuuummmm! lol But in general, those who ask about it are those who will be invited, and those who won't be invited will ultimately understand I think Smiley smile

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  • Valerie
    VIP April 2017 Ontario
    Valerie ·
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    Haha! The art of deflection. Like, "so weddings coming up, you must be excited! Have you picked a venue? " "oh yes, very excited! Ya, a winery out by Niagara... omg did you see that email from Sarah? That deadline is crazy!" BOOM distraction!! I like to give very short generic answers so that people don't feel like you're being weirdly secretive for completely avoiding the question.
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  • Jessica
    Beginner August 2018 Ontario
    Jessica ·
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    I thought the same thing. I'm the administrator so luckily I have all their addresses so that won't be an issue. Smiley laugh
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  • Jessica
    Beginner August 2018 Ontario
    Jessica ·
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    I agree! Hopefully I don't run into very many of these situations lol
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  • Kacy
    VIP February 2019 Quebec
    Kacy ·
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    Great question, I am in a similar situation, so thank you for posting this! I am planning to do as the previous posters suggested: inviting those with whom I am close with, such as those with whom I have gone out for weekend trips or done activities with on our own (i.e. outside of the 5 à 7 we organize fairly often), chat semi-regularly with via phone or text.

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  • Erin
    Master September 2017 Ontario
    Erin ·
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    I agree with what's been said. I would also suggest sending the invites to their home address if you're concerned about what other co-workers will think if you hand them out at work. I had a co-worker who got married a few years ago and he only invited a few people from the office and only to the reception. No one who wasn't invited made a fuss as far as I know.
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  • Jessica
    Beginner August 2018 Ontario
    Jessica ·
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    Yes. I have thought of no co-workers all together but there are a handful of people I do actually want there. Other people will just have to understand. Thanks!
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  • Jessica
    Beginner August 2018 Ontario
    Jessica ·
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    Thank you that's very helpful!
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  • Kacy
    VIP February 2019 Quebec
    Kacy ·
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    I am so not good at this.. I find it so awkward to change the subject, I must learn from you! lol

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  • Valerie
    VIP April 2017 Ontario
    Valerie ·
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    I think it's totally fine to just invite the people you are close with. I would just avoid talking wedding at the office so that people don't feel excluded. If anyone asks, just keep it short but polite (like when people who aren't invited ask me when the wedding is I always reply, end of April. If they ask what day I tell them, it's not a state secret! But I try not to give any details and I try and change the subject quickly without being rude and abrubt). And if the people you did invite try to talk wedding I would just steer the conversation away from the wedding whenever possible (they'll likely get the hint).

    People will understand in the end that you just can't afford to invite everyone.

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  • Samtam
    VIP November 2016 British Columbia
    Samtam ·
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    If you do want to include some people from your office, I think it makes sense to go with those that you are close with. There may be some gossip though over who is and isn't invited so just be prepared for that and how you will address it! There will always be those people that think they should be invited and inside you're like "why?..." If you are really concerned about space, it is easier to just make a "no coworkers" rule. If you hang out with them outside of work, then that's a different story and I would consider them friends not coworkers.

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